#this is so--

[jennrypan]

"Heres this app you need for specific functions! But!! Oh they dont fucking work!! The modern age is so amazing! It doesnt matter if it might charge you twice and not refund the money or if the app always crashes!"

...I hate modernized technology so much Im actually shaking.

[goopeculiar]

the most wonderful time of the year johnny/taeyong, NC-17, 9910 words. johnny prides himself on being a nice, calm, level headed alpha, but in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to revert to his base instincts, to bend taeyong over the railing and shove his face into taeyong’s pussy right there on the front porch. 

“yeah, he’s super nice,” yuta agrees, pulling johnny back to the present. “i still can’t get over how good looking he is.”

johnny lets out a hysterical laugh before he can help it. “yeah, that’s–he’s definitely, uh, attractive.”

yuta snickers, rolling his eyes. “you don’t have to be coy about it,” he says. “at least to me. just don’t let mark catch on to how bad you wanna bone his mom.”

“i don’t–i don’t want to bone his mom,” johnny nearly wheezes. “i was just agreeing with you!”

“sure, jan,” yuta says. “whatever you say.”

[goopeculiar]

Password Protected chanyeol/everyone, NC-17, 12000 words. Chanyeol wonders, who else got a text this morning? Who else knew? It could be.. it could be half the team. There could be four or five guys in this room wandering around with texts on their phones, right next to their hotel key cards, just as if Chanyeol is an electronic lock and they could open him up, too, whenever they wanted.

[goopeculiar]

four minutes away from a heart attack soonyoung/wonwoo/junhui, NC-17, 10246 words. For some reason, Soonyoung’s really starting to think that all those times he’s walked in on Wonwoo and Junhui weren’t accidents after all.

[goopeculiar]

Halloween taemin/jonghyun, NC-17, 14936 words. Taemin dresses up as a catboy for Halloween. As a joke.

[bellasdumptruckass]

This is how tumblr showed me your blog and it cut off the word "pregnant" and the phrase too and what I'm saying is that the cut word and phrase are so funny and reminded me of the "can u get pregante" video with the yahoo questions where they misspell the word pregnant anyway that's all have a nice day

LISTEN WHEN YOU GET PREGANTE--

sdaljkflksadjflk im crying, thank you for showing this to me lmaoooo

[goopeculiar]

Highway to Heaven wonwoo/nonbinary!soonyoung, NC-17, 5122 words. Nothing was far from whatever was going on—which was absolutely, so blatantly something, especially after Soonyoung so brazenly downed three glasses of Coca-Cola, fascinated by the concept of complimentary refills, and kept matching each glass with water to balance out all the sugar.

“Do you need me to stop?”