fight or flight
Well hey there misfits and lost souls does anybody else in recovery ever have the feeling of complacency when they stay still for a while? I mean not that it's happening at the moment luckily I've been doing quite well over the weeks leading up to and following the recent holidays. I'm curious though if it's a particular amount or lack there is of the 12 step program. I've benefitted in the past from doing the steps but to be honest never really could get on board with being "powerless” or giving my self will up to a so called higher power. Maybe the fact I fell victim to seeing myself as one and found it hard to blindly believe in something that's allowed me to go through the amount of hardship I had to.
So I'm curious I guess about if others have the same feelings or have had. What has previously worked in my life has been just simple support. I'm a firm believer that when an Addict feels they won't be shamed or made to feel like they are hurting everyone around them, they're more so likely to come clean about the hurt they're dealing with and trust they'll be loved anyways, supported anyways, and have a place to rest their head and try for recovery. Though people don't understand that when an addict comes clean or at times get caught red handed (sometimes that's the extreme needed, for them to be honest) and whoever loves them and reacts in a way that is either attacking them or attempting to get through by saying things like “"how could you do this to me, and your family how can you live this way you're cut off until you're clean etc” that immediately creates *flight mode* that addict will react back, likely shut down feeling anger and their demons will likely cause them to run. Not only does that cause them to spiral out and hide but they definitely won't come to you for help ever again. So yep you'll possibly lose them which isn't what you wanted of course and you're left without.
I guess I just need to try new things and keep an open mind I believe in a greater power I just have a hard time feeling connected. Anyone else get that?