I don’t know how many people on my blog know about
But let me tell you. I’ve been a Christian my whole life.
And I’m only just now realizing how much TEA is in this ancient book.
I beg of you to hear me out
So. Short summary for context.
My man Isaac asks God to help his wife Rebecca to conceive.
God’s like “ight. I gotchu bro.”
Right at the birth, it’s a race. Whoever is born first will inherit the blessing. It looks like it’s going to be a close one.
The midwife sees the baby and is Esau. But just as Esau was being born, Jacob was right on his heel.
So Esau is going to be the man of the house right?
Esau gave up his birthright to his brother Jacob, FOR A BOWL OF SOUP.
This wasn’t any birth right by the way. This birthright was for an ENTIRE NATION.
So Esau comes to his father’s deathbed and he’s like “So Dad, where’s my birthright.”
His dad is like “Bro I just gave it to you already?”
Esau gets furious realizing what his brother done.
THIS ISN’T EVEN THE TEA GUYS.
So Jacob’s on the run. Cause Esau over here trying to kill Jacob.
Jacob runs through the desert till he comes across these Sheppards. And among them is this gorgeous girl.
Jacob is head over heels for her immediately. So he comes to her father and is like “Please let me marry her.”
The father of Rachel, Laban, was like “bro I ain’t gonna give you my youngest daughter for nothing!”
So Jacob’s like, “Fine. I’ll work seven years for you. Then you shall give me your daughters hand in marriage.”
Y’all, this man was so in love that he did it. He worked his butt off for seven years for Rachel.
By the end of it, Jacob comes to Laban and is like “Okay. I did the work. Now let me marry Rachel.”
So Laban smiles and throws a feast. The bride is dressed up in clothing. Her face is covered in a veil. Jacob gets married.
Jacob wakes up to see he didn’t marry Rachel. HE MARRIED HER SISTER, LEAH!
Jacob storms to Laban and is shouting.
“YOU GAVE ME THE WRONG GIRL!”
Laban plays coy. “It’s disgraceful for the youngest to be married before the eldest,” Laban tells Jacob. “But I’ll tell you this. If you work for me for another seven years, I’ll give you Rachel.”
He worked FOURTEEN YEARS FOR HIS GURL.
But low, this is only the beginning of the drama. Because now Rachel and Leah were living under the same tent.
This is why I love the Bible. Yes it can sometimes be boring. But if you choose to realize these were real people, you gotta imagine outside the words.