#tiny songs

[tinylilhollander]

Well, I've officially written a Hollanov song. Now it's just restringing my guitars and actually recording it. ✨

[tinylilemrys]

I just spent money I don't have on new guitar strings to sunk cost fallacy my way into actually writing something. Or at least recording something. I miss being a songwriter.

[tinylilhollander]

Another Hollanov song, this time about the cruel voice in Ilya's head that sounds like his father, and the man who doesn't know that side of him at all. Fully lyrics under the cut ✨

Voices

Because you could not stop for breath you take his where you can You were told that through each conquest you'd become a man So why is it the only time you feel remotely real Is when you're lying in his arms pretending not to feel?

The dog inside you never dies, it simply slinks away And stalks you when it gets too quiet, eyes fixed on its prey And though he says he doesn't hate this weakness you can't shake You think he deserves better than this fragile thing you'll break

Don't forget you're lazy, boy Don't forget you're scared Don't forget you're such a dick That you've never really cared Don't forget that every time You've pretended you could change You've only made things worse You'll always be this way

So now you have a fixed appointment each Tuesday at two You arrive at every session hopeful for a clue Something that will point you to the thing in you that broke But I know it's a waiting game, that once again you'll choke

Don't forget you're lazy, boy Don't forget you're scared Don't forget you're such a dick That you've never really cared Don't forget that every time You've pretended you could change You've only made things worse You'll always be this—

Wait a minute, he's still here He whispers softly as he draws you near "Why'd you let his voice ever make you feel so small? I know you so well, but not that side of you at all.

I don't know you lazy, love I've never seen you scared I know that you're not a dick And I know how much you care And, baby, every time I've seen you Determined you can change You've always made it work You've always been this way You've always been this way

[tinylilhollander]

Face reveal 🫣 (on this blog anyway) and also the full Only heaven and the lilies know song. Enjoy ✨

Lyrics under the cut:

June Love The sun on the water The scent of the pines in the air Let's not head back like we ought to Stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

Your fingertips on my shoulder The cool of the lake at our feet Yes, I know it's getting colder But stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

My June Love Hold closer to me The nights are getting longer And I don't want you to leave

We're warming up by the fire As we try to steal a few hours more Yes, I know you're getting tired But stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

Your smile in the moonlight The secrets we share in the dark I wish for forever in this tonight Stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

My June Love Hold closer to me The days are getting shorter And I don't want you to leave

The last stars in the evening We knew that this summer would end Come the dawn you'll be leaving But stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

Oh stay a little longer, Love Stay here with me

[tinylilhollander]

Ahh it's finally here – the long-awaited Hollanov song. This is the first track I've recorded properly in ages and I'm just so flipping happy with how it turned out. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing and recording it. 🫶

Lyrics under the cut

Harder to Define

It's been several empty months Wondering if I'd ever be back in your good graces But here we are and all at once I find that time erased by the smile on your face

And my only thought now as our hands Bridge that mile-wide space across the sand

This is the first thing in a long time That's felt real, that's felt mine And I know we shouldn't But even you can't deny This thing between us Is getting harder to define

I was gonna tough it out Grit my teeth, grin and bear the things demanded But here you are now in my arms I'll face my fears, I'll do whatever you command

And my only thought now as my tongue Meets the salt on yours and I'm undone

This is the first thing in a long time That's felt real, that's felt mine And I know we shouldn't But even you can't deny This thing between us Is getting harder to define

It's getting harder to define

And my only thought now as our hands Fall back into place and I understand

This is the first thing in a long time That's felt real, that's felt mine And I know we shouldn't But even you can't deny This thing between us Is getting harder to define

This is the first thing in a long time That's felt real, that's felt mine And I know we shouldn't But even you can't deny This thing between us Is getting harder to define

And I know we shouldn't But even you can't deny This thing between us Is getting harder to define

[tinylilhollander]

The power is out so I can't record the first Hollanov song in full like I wanted to, but here's a snippet of a second one from Ilya's perspective in the meantime.

Lyrics under the cut

Because you could not stop for breath

You take his when you can

You were told that through each conquest

You'd become a man

So why is it the only time

You feel remotely real

Is when you're lying in his arms

Pretending not to feel?

The dog inside you never dies

It simply slinks away

It stalks you when it gets to quiet

Eyes fixed on its prey

And though he says he doesn't hate

This weakness you can't shake

You think he deserves better than

This fragile thing you'll break

Don't forget you're lazy, boy

Don't forget you're scared

Don't forget you're such a dick

You've never really cared

Don't forget that every time

You've pretended you could change

You've only made things worse

You'll always be this way

[tinylilhollander]

The power is out and trying to work on one tiny screen while hotspotting wifi from my phone is pissing me off, so instead I'm working on angsty Ilya lyrics.

[tinylilemrys]

A little unrehearsed sapphic cover of Fields of Gold by Sting because I know in my heart of hearts this should be a wlw love song