Dec 13, 2019
Harley Quinn (S.1 Ep.1) Till death do us part
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Harley Quinn (S.1 Ep.1) Till death do us part
cuando juego con enchufes
Nunca pensé que volver a escuchar tu nombre me derrumbase no .
Me derrumbase como si una corriente de electricidad me recorriese todo el cuerpo quemando cada parte de mi sistema nervioso, provocándome corto circuitos que hacen que me estremezca de placer. Porque hoy me he vuelto a sentir como la niña pequeña que se dedica a jugar con tenedores y enchufes. Esa niña a la que todo el mundo ve, pero que nadie tiene ni el tiempo ni las ganas de apartarla y explicarle que en una de esas puede que no vuelva a abrir los ojos.
Pero si te tengo que ser sincera, ni mucho menos llegue a imaginar que un lunes a las siete de la mañana tendría que cambiar las sabanas. Porque tú has decidido volver a aparecerte por mis sueños. Y me has desvelado. Y lo peor de todo, es que no me puedo controlar. Que no se si las sabanas están mojadas porque me he corrido por que aun no te puedo olvidar; o porque me he meado.
Si me he meado encima como una niña pequeña. Del miedo.
A que no vuelvas. O a que lo hagas.
A que no vuelva a sentir tus manos.
O a que las sienta demasiado.
Te tengo miedo y te quiero.
Me tengo miedo y por eso me odio.
TOXIC RELATIONSHIP
Hello everyone! After a really long break I'm back with a new post based on my personal experience with a toxical relationship. If anyone of you is not interested in this kind of information, please just scroll down and have a nice day :)
I want to share my experience there because I believe I'm not the only one who may have encountered with that. If this post helped or inspired even just one person, I would be very glad. <3
The first half of this year was very tough for me. After I finished exam period in February, I felt a relief. At that time I had a boyfriend and we were almost 3 years together. We had some problems but we were always able to solve most of them. I believed that those unsolved ones will become solved thanks to moving together we had been planning for a few months. Moreover, I had such a bad relationship with my parents that I started to consider moving together as a way to escape from that. My boyfriend didn't like my parents and they didn't like him for some reasons. I didn't take their opinions personally, because they never liked boys I was in a relationship with. I thought my parents didn't like me neither and most of the time I felt like a black sheep of my family.
We were searching for a suitable apartment. Fortunately we found an ideal one in the same city my parents live in. At the beginning of March, we started moving there. We were happy, worked on it and did everything was needed to make that place feel like home. One day I just came home, packed all my things, farewelled with my parents and left.
First month of living together was lovely. After that, everything started to become as shitty as possible but we were trying to work it out. For instance, I love roses and was wishing to get a rose as a gift from him, no matter if for birthday, anniversary or just to make me happy. He knew about it but didn't do it. So I told him it would make me really happy to get a cute lil rose but we got into a terrible row because he got terribly angry about why to do give me such a thing that "doesn't last long"... A few days later he actually suprised me with a rose. However, when giving me it he said with a terribly emotionless voice "Anyway, it will die."
Another day there was an incident between us that left me speechless: I was preparing lunch in the kitchen while he was unpacking shopping bags full of food and other supplies. I was talking about my friends, how they helped me with some kind of a thing, what were their opinions on that and so on. I mentioned unintentionally a name of my friend he was jealous of. At that moment he was holding a bar of soap and asked me.
"Do you know what I'm holding?"
"Umm, yes, a bar of soap?"
"Well in the past prisoners were beaten with that..." (I was shocked and didn't know what to say but he continued) "Yeah, people put it in a sock, spun it like this (demonstrated the move to me) and beat the prisoners' heads"
"Umm, okay. " He then came behind me and beat my head 3 times with it.
"What the hell are you doing?! It hurts!!"
"That's just for you to know." And then he left to our bedroom.
I was shocked and couldn't believe that. I was able to talk about that again two days later when I confrontated him with what happened during those two day. To my surprise he denied he had done that and claimed he remembered only that he was holding a soap and nothing more...
You can't imagine how frightened I started to get. Normally I would probably leave it as it was but he was a person really interested into guns who also was a legal owner of five various ones. It was and still is his lifestyle and he subordinated everything to that. I was scared he would hurt me one day or sth like that and I wasn't feeling safe at all during his presence because he behaved really weird and argued a lot with me after the incidents. Moreover, my family was scared as well and wanted me to return no matter what.
Two and a half months after moving in I left him and returned to my parents while he was at work. I couldn't stand any longer and I was so tired of living in a fear. He behaved like an emotional freak when he returned home and realized there was no trace after me and all my things were away. A week later I collapsed and ended up in a hospital for a few hours because of a severe tetany seizure. Three weeks later I am here and I'm so happy because my relationship with parents is on its best, I finished my exam period even if with not so good results and nobody limits me and treats me the way he did:
He was too focused on money and rather bought himself a new expensive gun than make me happy with sth little and cute.
Argued with me many times because I wasn’t able to give him the certain amount of money he wanted (as a double major I wasn’t able to work so much and pay half of the apartment expenses as he wanted; he earned about 13 times more than I did)
When sth happened between us and he was the gulity one, a few days later he distorted what happene and made me overreacting and psychically unstable person
His parents mustn’t have known about my illnesses and the medicine I was taking because “I don’t know how they will accept it”.
The same happened with my family background. Moreover, he was the only child and the only grandson for both his grandparents, so he got everything and all the attention he wanted whereas I am the older child from a family that sometimes struggled to make ends meet. Nothing to be ashamed of, it can happen to everyone.
He hated some of my friends and made a bad fun of them. Sometimes he even wouldn’t let me go out with them because he was too jealous he doesn’t have so great friends as I do.
He even wouldn’t let me go to a cultural event where could be many people because he was afraid sth would happen to me and he was seeing danger everywhere and tried to protect me even when it was absolutely unnecessary. He was absolutely obsessive about it and I felt like I had no freedom.
He told me not to wear floral dresses because “You would look like an old farmer’s wife”. However, everytime I wear a dress like this these days my fiends and family call me pretty.
Two weeks after splitting up with him he told me I’m not able to find anybody new because nobody would accept me. “But I will do it for you, please return.”
He called me silly and stupid then because I changed my opinion of him fast.
He confessed he knew about the incidents actually, he was just too ashamed to tell the truth. However I still don’t believe him enough and I blocked him on chat. Even though I am thankful for all the help I got from him during those 3 years, this isn’t the man I would like to spend the rest of my life with.
Thank you for reading and plese reblog if you find this post helpful <3
Love, Jeri
I have got to stop giving mental resources to family who don't really care for the ME that I am. I'm tired of being nothing more than this vague concept or placeholder for them. The most draining and least productive "conversations" I have are with family who ask about me only so I can fill the empty space when they take a breath or search for something else to talk about that actually interests them. I can be a sympathetic ear only so many times before I need to retreat to cleanse my brain. Everyone needs to vent, ideally to someone who actually LISTENS and cares. I get so tired of being the only one to bring that to the table. This is why I get quiet and stop communicating for a while. But they don't notice or care. By the time they start to wonder why they haven't heard from me (or, rather, had me to talk at), I've moved on to try to find a tiny slice of inner peace. It eludes me a lot, especially with the "downpour" the Universe is currently hurling at me (that I'm NOT sharing with said family because I've learned that they don't care).
I'm tired, so tired. Family is more exhausting than strangers for this flaming introvert.
টক্সিক রিলেশন: কিভাবে বুঝবেন আপনি টক্সিক সম্পর্কে আছেন? | Toxic relation...
টক্সিক রিলেশন: কিভাবে বুঝবেন আপনি টক্সিক সম্পর্কে আছেন? Toxic relationship
আপনার জীবনে কি এমন কোনো সম্পর্ক আছে যা আপনার মানসিক শান্তি নষ্ট করছে? টক্সিক সম্পর্ক আপনার জীবনের অন্যতম বড় চ্যালেঞ্জ হতে পারে। এই ভিডিওতে আমরা আলোচনা করেছি টক্সিক সম্পর্কের ৭টি সাধারণ লক্ষণ, কীভাবে এটি চিহ্নিত করবেন এবং নিজেকে রক্ষা করবেন।
একটি টক্সিক সম্পর্ক শুধু আবেগগতভাবে নয়, শারীরিক ও মানসিকভাবে আপনাকে ক্ষতিগ্রস্ত করতে পারে। আপনি কি জানেন কিভাবে এই সম্পর্কগুলো আমাদের আত্মবিশ্বাস কমিয়ে দিতে পারে এবং জীবনে নেতিবাচক প্রভাব ফেলে? এই প্রশ্নের উত্তর এবং আরো গুরুত্বপূর্ণ তথ্য পেতে পুরো ভিডিওটি দেখুন।
এই ভিডিওতে যা যা থাকছে: টক্সিক সম্পর্কের লক্ষণ চেনার উপায় টক্সিক সম্পর্কের কারণ ও প্রভাব টক্সিক সম্পর্ক থেকে মুক্তির সহজ উপায় সুস্থ সম্পর্কের জন্য করণীয় টিপস কেন এই ভিডিওটি দেখবেন?
আপনার জীবনে সম্পর্ক একটি বড় ভূমিকা পালন করে। টক্সিক সম্পর্ক থেকে মুক্তি পেতে সঠিক তথ্য ও পদক্ষেপ জানা অত্যন্ত গুরুত্বপূর্ণ। এই ভিডিওটি আপনাকে সুস্থ সম্পর্কের গুরুত্ব সম্পর্কে সচেতন করবে এবং জীবনে নতুন আশার আলো জ্বালাবে।
ভিডিওটি যারা দেখলে উপকৃত হবেন: যারা মানসিক চাপ বা হতাশার মধ্যে আছেন যারা সম্পর্ক নিয়ে সন্দেহ বা উদ্বেগ অনুভব করছেন যারা নিজের মূল্য বোঝার চেষ্টা করছেন এই ভিডিওটি শেয়ার করুন আপনার বন্ধু ও পরিবারের সাথে, যারা এই বিষয়ের সম্পর্কে জানার প্রয়োজনীয়তা অনুভব করছেন।
#ToxicRelationship #RelationshipTips #MentalHealth #SelfCare #RelationshipAdvice #ToxicSigns #বাংলা_ভিডিও #টক্সিক_সম্পর্ক
🔔 আমাদের চ্যানেল সাবস্ক্রাইব করুন এবং নোটিফিকেশন অন করে রাখুন, যেন পরবর্তী ভিডিও মিস না করেন।
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why was I so stupid
to believe
Anything
other than my heart.
People who are toxic to your wellbeing...let them go.
Not just physically, but even mentally.
You should know that their emotional experiences has nothing to do with you. It reflects nothing but their issues and insecurities. It doesn't reflect anything about your worth or value.
Outgrow them once and for all.
No, don't tell me: "you attract what you are" What if you are good and attract bad guys? What if you are honest and attract liars? What if you are loyal and attract those who deceive? What if you're good at heart and attract the tough? No, you don't always attract what you are... Sometimes you attract people who desperately need who you are. Nashiha Pervin but they will NEVER become like you are, I add