Shoulders & Cranberries
Whew! Well shoulder day was inspiring…at least to some one.. I never thought myself a weak individual; certainly not physically. I mean sure I’m skinny now but there was a time that I had a bit of muscle and a hard on for martial arts… at least the Steven Segal eat and flip gangsters onto buffet table kind.
Today however, I felt physically weak. I mean wow! Having a day designed ONLY to focus on shoulders seemed a bit, wasteful. Waste of time waste of money waste of energy. I’m gonna breeze through today’s work out.
W R O N G ! ! !
In the beginning: I warmed up of course as per my instructors demanding voice and flawless Asian physique: “You warm up, or you tear muscle.” this is his every day version of good morning. I’m cool with it, he’s all business and I like not having to converse about politics or the weekend, or real estate (I’m an agent) .. Work out, go home. Complete time-saving awesomeness in a 5′7″ 25 year old Asian guy who’s never had more than 3% body fat in his entire existence. Let’s Move!
So I warm up. It’s THE hash-tag for boring but I do it to appease my trainer and my ego. Yeah, my ego likes to warm up. Not to be confused w/ Eggo’s, which I would devour without uttering a single syllable in recompense.. NOM-NOM…
After the Hash-tag session, we start the systematic deconstruction of my ego.
The Workout - Shoulders
Standing Over head dumbbell press:
Set 1: 12-15 reps @ 10 lbs.
Set 2: 10-12 reps @ 12.5 lbs
Set 3: 6 reps @ 15 lbs
Rope to face pulls standing:
Set 1: 12-15 reps @ 20 lbs.
Set 2: 10-12 reps @ 25 lbs
Set 3: 8-10 reps @ 30 lbs
Standing Over-head barbell press:
Set 1: 12-15 reps @ 20 lbs.
Set 2: 10-12 reps @ 30 lbs
Set 3: 10-12 reps @ 30 lbs
Seated Over head dumbbell press w/ a twist:
Set 1: 12-15 reps @ 10 lbs.
Set 2: 10-12 reps @ 12.5 lbs
Set 3: 8-10 reps @ 12.5 lbs
Standing Shoulder Fly’s? (yes I made it up):
Set 1: 12-15 reps @ 10 lbs.
Set 2: 10-12 reps @ 12.5 lbs
Set 3: 6-8 reps @ 12.5 lbs
See? This shit is serious. That Asian is serious. I am the hash-tag for sore. There were sets that I could bury, like the overhead standing DB press and the overhead standing BB press and the rope pulls. Now the seated torture chair with a twist at the bottom….well i stopped every other rep like the ego-less sissy man boy that I am and pondered: “how did I get to be such a pussy?” …. and then: snapped back into reality by the broken word play that is my trainers English, I continued…
……then it happened: The Cranberries started playing in the gym. As I worked out my shoulders in what can be described as a form of self hatred I listened to The Cranberries and my eyes teared up as I realized: that’s it. I’ll never hear that band live again and I was sad. A piece of my life was spent listening to this band. Loving this band. They were fresh, original and lets face facts: She has/had the best Female Rock Voice ever. It pissed me off. So when that evil Asian Trainer of mine nagged to keep my form proper, I shot him a look of complete hatred and I pushed that fucking barbell through the ceiling and thought: “when I get home I’m gonna wake the world up with some Cranberries….and i might eat one, just one ego.”
