Real Moms Don’t Let Them Watch TV - Ugh FU!
I haven’t been diligent about writing in 2016. I take that back, diligent isn’t the word, I just literally haven’t written anything in 2016. I started this post in my mind over a hundred times - but, as time went on and I got farther and farther away from the last time I posted, I felt that there was just too much to cover to ever begin writing again.
Why because like most artists I am insecure and mask those insecurities with excuses, a part of my personality that I am trying to overcome. Therefore, here’s the last six months in a nutshell.
Since the last post on New Year’s Eve, the twins turned one year, we went back to visit the amazing doctors and nurses at the Mount Sinai NICU (Exhibit A), we threw them an amazing first birthday party (nautical themed, ridiculously cute and most elements custom Etsy creations - Exhibit B & C), my freelance job officially ended, both twins crawled, cruised and now genuinely walk (we lovingly refer to them as “Frankenbabies”), we started looking for a house in Bergen County, NJ, then we signed them up for a pre-two’s program and decided to stay in the city until next May (search now on the backburner), the twin’s appeared in episode 17, season 6 of Blue Bloods as crying baby (Exhibit D), I started working on my small business venture and was promptly thwarted by another freelance opportunity (I shall return to it!), Spencer became a full-fledge toddler, tantrums and all, Miriam discovered and immediately started her love affair with watermelon (Exhibit E), we welcomed our wonderful new nanny into the family, we started swim classes - and didn’t cry (Exhibit F) and last - but definitely one of my biggest accomplishments - I took the twins to the Central Park Zoo to meet our besties, by myself (it’s the farthest I’ve ever taken them without an escape root, meaning on foot and with no one to help me there or back in case shit went down!) All-in-all a hell of a six months!
Well...now that we’re caught up, it’s time to delve in to TV, an acronym that scares a lot of parents - and I don’t know why. When I’m home, the TV is on if not all, then most, of the time. I watch so much Bravo that I thought at least one twin’s first words would be “Andy Cohen!”
When they first came home, TV was a way for me to keep from going insane. I felt, like I’m sure a lot of new parents do, that not only was I alone with companions that couldn’t communicate, but that if I didn’t have ambient noise the voices in my head telling me to go to sleep might take over. Also, I have to say that NICU babies are different, they’re used to, and even crave, a certain level of noise and light.
Even now, the kids need noise to feel comfortable. They sleep with noise machines and night lights and we’re in a small apartment so they can pretty much hear everything that goes on around them all the time.
When they were six months old we let them watch a children’s show for the first time, Daniel Tiger. They were thrilled. We sat them in their Bumbo seats, since at six months they both still couldn’t sit up, and plopped them in front of the TV.
Both Jeff and I had grown up with TV as a mainstay in our households and for me it didn’t seem so wrong to expose my children to educational television - but in the back of my mind it did lead me to question my parenting skills.
There are so many studies and theories and “parenting styles” and some say it’s ok to integrate educational TV - honestly how do we really know. Frankly speaking everyone I know loves TV and we’re all really awesome with high IQs, great jobs, loving families and acceptable levels of physical fitness. One of the biggest conclusions the whole TV debate has led me to is that I’m going to fuck up my kids in one way or another - it’s literally inevitable.
As they’ve grown we’ve integrated TV into their routine more and more, mostly because it calms them. The repetitive nature of children’s television together with the valuable lessons on letter, numbers, colors and friendships keep them entertained and allow us and their other caregivers to catch our breath. They love shows with lots of singing - Baby Genius nursery rhymes, Daniel Tiger, Sesame Street, Bubble Guppies and The Fresh Beat Band.
So to each his own, but honestly if you don’t let your kids watch TV, you probably shouldn’t come over… :)