Oh my god yeeess! Who walks out of the movie theatre after a movie and suggest they watch another movie straight after?Uncle Lies - and because he refuses to pick a movie, he’ll let Aunt Despair pick it, spend the whole movie criticising it and then say afterwards “we should watch this movie because it’s better.” Who swears like a sailor when driving?Aunt Despair - she has her windows wide open so she doesn’t have to listen to the kids in the back and she shouts at over cars not caring if they hear her. Who is always ten minutes early to appointments?Uncle Lies. Then he’ll make the receptionists life hell if the appointment is even a minute or two late. Who swears they can set up the new home entertainment system without any help?Aunt Despair. The inevitably one of the kids will try and help and she’ll blame it on them if it goes wrong. (Although tbh she’ll do that anyway.) Who can spend five hours straight in ikea?Aunt Despair - and only partly because most of her dead drop things happen there. The other reason is she just likes dropping her kids at the play area and then hiding in one of the set up living rooms to read a magazine and drink. That way it’s quieter than her house and she doesn’t have to deal with bullshit when her neighbours inevitably complain about Francis. Who buys things online & returns them a few days later?Aunt Despair, mostly because she has a scam going. It’s gotten to the point where the phone operator know she’s scamming them somehow but they can’t figure out how. Who plays the music so loud that it basically ruins everyone’s hearing?Aunt Despair, she uses it as a punishment method. Who is more likely to spend money on unnecessary things?Uncle Lies, in fact he spends more money on them than on his children or on Aunt Despair. It helps that he’s run god knows how many credit card scams. Who stays up until 5am reading?Aunt Despair, Uncle Lies tells her to turn the light out because he can’t sleep which makes her aggressive read and stay up for longer. Who has a strict “no shoes” rule in the house?Aunt Despair, it was implemented because Francis has a habit of dragging mud, blood and bits of poor animals into the house and rather than deal with the issue Despair decided to just stop them wearing shoes in the house.Who complains about not having a bathtub because they can’t buy bath bombs?Uncle Lies. He’s obsessed with bath/shower stuff, like he has so many various things that he never even uses. It started as a way to torment Hyper when she was younger but now it’s just become a habit. Who’s the more competitive one?Aunt Despair. Sure Uncle Lies is competitive but he eventually gets bored, Aunt Despair never gets bored, she will never stop. She will keep going until she wins and she destroys you.
