Here y’all filthy sinners. Also, warning: if complete and utter fluff is not your thing, then I advise against reading this post. Also includes PDA and height headcannons because I have no impulse control.
~Sans~
-Soft and gentle. Almost like a face-nuzzle. With his teeth. Because... no lips... He’s actually kinda surprised that you don’t dislike the feeling of literal teeth against your skin, but he doesn’t really complain since, well, you like them.
-Too lazy to always go up on his toes to smooch your face or wait for an opportunity when you’re down to his level (his level is 5 foot. He smol), so you find that he has a fondness for your hand or, if you’re minuscule enough, your neck. Also, he never asks to kiss you. It’s spontaneous and kinda jarring because, y’all could be doing nothing when surprise motherf*cker you just smooched the skeleton.
-Caution: he might fall asleep half-kiss if you’re lazing around during it, and/or there is a 99.99% chance he’ll follow the display of affection with a display of puns on said affection. Bad puns. Stop him.
-Likes to receive kisses on the cheek. Not too much effort, but he knows you love him. Plus, you’re lips are soft, and he enjoys the feeling of them on his bones. They’re nice, but he doesn’t want to abuse his privilege, so he won’t demand much of you.
-When you lounge around with him, there is a high percentile chance he’ll nudge your temple once or twice. It’s lethargic and faint, but you know it’s there. He just wants to make sure you still tolerate his presence, no biggie.
-Overall there isn’t a lot of kissing initiated by him, but he’s contented with you just being there, and he makes sure his lethargic opposition to PDA and/or excessive apathy doesn’t get in the way of you fully understanding that.
~Papyrus~
-Boisterous, and usually painful because his overzealous nature can get in the way of the common sense that his teeth hurt like balls clunking against your comparatively squishier lips that exuberantly.
-But sweet and genuine kisses nonetheless, swollen bruises aside.
-Picks you up in a swinging hug almost every time without fail. Will make you feel fairly dizzy by the end of it, and not just because of the affection. Will also trigger fear of heights if you have it, probably. Because, I don’t know, a 7 foot something monster is picking you a few feet off the ground? He might accidentally throw you once in a while. Whoops, nope, he didn’t mean to do that. Forgive him.
-Likes to proclaim his uttermost feelings to you in-between smooches. Even in public. PDA to him has no bounds. If you’re uncomfortable with that amount of... zest being shown to others outside of your home, he will pitifully attempt to restrain himself until you get back to the house.
-He just loves you too much, dammit.
-He likes any and all kinds of kisses, but has a squeamish dislike for French-kissing. It isn’t because of you, or anything, of course. He just feels as if it’s too... scandalous to be doing on a normal, everyday basis. Also, the tongues. Why. It just doesn’t look like a good time to him, and he’ll be hesitant on trying it.
~Undyne~
-Fuhuhuhu kissing is for the weak, nerd!
-She is weak. She is very weak.
-Passionate as all hell, she’ll pick you up and proceed to nearly cut your face into slivers with her sharp teeth. If she isn’t able to lift you (which would be a very rare occurrence, since she’s strong AF and 6′ 5″) or you’re just that much taller than her, she’ll wrap her arms around your neck to plant a few than just one on you.
-It usually ends with a kind of breathless ‘Fuhu! Love you, babe!’
-She doesn’t mind PDA, but she is very respectful of your boundaries and will even stop being so brash if you kindly ask her to subdue her muscles, because they’re hard and painful and she often underestimates her own strength. She might be a little downtrodden that she’s accidentally been hurting you, but she’ll take whatever measures it takes for it never to happen again.
-Like Papyrus, kissing with her has no bounds. But, unlike Papsicle, she can 100% do French-kissing and will. She enjoys smooches on the lips or anywhere on her neck, and she will just melt if you start to kiss her scars or gills.
~Alphys~
-Chaste, shy, and barely-there. She’ll also stutter out many apologies afterwards, or, if not that, you’ll hear a quiet ‘hhhhnnnnnnnn’ when she hides her reddened face in her claws.
-Very smol at 4′ 4″, you can lift her and smooch her at the same time.
-Very embarrassed and blushy but loves you very much and will take all of you abuse undying displays of your utmost love and cherishing with minimal internal death.
-That being said, she will flush and bear it through PDA, but you’d have a pistachio-sized brain to even imagine that she’d return the favour outside of closed doors. The second you get home, she might be comfortable with a few kisses, but before that she Suffering.
-Likes all kisses that don’t involve the lips or anything below the neck. Cheeks, foreheads, noses, ears, even eyelids are all acceptable places to smooch her and she will 100% appreciate.
~Toriel~
-Motherly and... you have to remind her that you’re her S/O and that she can kiss your lips, otherwise she’ll just be very self-conscious about it until the day she dies.
-Very fluffy and tender. She usually bends down to plant one on your temple or on your head, but when she’s sitting with you and your heights are then similar, she goes for your cheeks and nose. And what I mean by similar heights, I mean she’s 8 foot something and she’s almost 99% of the time taller than you.
-Nose-nuzzle champions 20XX, no effort required. None.
-PDA is a bit stilted in public, both because of awkward height-differences and awkward social situations. She is usually surrounded by children 24/7 and would rather not be a bad influence upon their behavior... but she is more than willing to hold your hand in her paw or nudge your temple once in a while.
-Likes ear-kisses. They tickle both you and her, sure, but if you want to see her begin to giggle semi-immediately, just attack her floofy ears with smooches. (You also might get some hair stuck on your lips, please pardon her).
~Asgore~
-What kiss? I’m allowed to kiss you? Since... when?
-You have to tell him that you like him very much and that he 100% has permission to smooch you to get him to even attempt stealing one.
-A bit gruff because he underestimates his enthusiasm at times, but his big muzzle and heaven-sent beard make up for it. It’s so s o f t. Literally God’s gift to your face. His beard feels like it’s made of the inner layer of fur off of a Siberian Husky. And, if you know what I’m talking about, you know that that shit is fluffy.
-Has a weakness for your cheeks and jawline because you complain that it tickles. He will tease you to no end about it and there is a 1000000% chance he will continue to pester you with his floof.
-PDA is... inelegant, per say. He’s most likely way taller than you (nine foot something, anyone?), so it’s much more noticeable than if he was about your height, and people are watching, and he’s worried you’ll get bullied because of him being your boyfriend, and- save him.
-His favourite kisses include nose-kisses and cheek-kisses. Smooch this man on the nose. Become the next nose-nuzzle champions. (Although he might be insecure about doing it again; it brings back some bad memories for him).
~Grillby~
-He’s a literal kitten when it comes to this. He becomes really cuddly and giggly, and you can almost always tell when he wants to kiss you because his flames flare a bit and he adjusts his glasses, not looking at you straight in the eye and crumpling his posture.
-Very warm, genuine, and wholesome, just like him. If he gets permission to kiss you, he tries his best not to let his shyness get in the way of giving you the best smooch he has to offer. It feels as if you’re being enveloped with a fresh-out-of-the-dryer blanket and you’ve just stuffed your face into it, although with the literal Godsend of a ginger, loving, utterly sincere kiss.
-Not gonna lie; he’s the best kisser out of everyone on this list, and is the only person to truly treat kissing as a Big Deal, besides Nabstablook. Also, his first kiss was likely you, as he did not have any prior relationships Underground. Every kiss is treasured with him and he will never forget a single one.
-PDA is a bit overbearing, to be honest. Like Grillby, please, for the love of God, stop hanging off of my arm-! He just loves you too much, dammit. Whenever you enter the bar, whenever you’re on any public dates, whenever anything happens, you will most likely get a face-nuzzle and a few kisses on the cheek from your favourite, six foot fiery boyfriend. If he wasn’t such a kitten, he’d be scary as hell at that height and with that amount of fire (pun intended).
-He likes any kind of smooches, really. As long as you’re willing to provide them then he is Down.
~W.D. Gaster~
-You thought Grillby acted nervous when asking for a kiss? Ha!
-He wrings his hands together, sweats, stutters and almost gives up because he finds that he looks pathetic like this. Pick up on the slight changes in his mood or habits and you’ll know when he wants something like this, saving you both the ungraceful dancing-around-each-other.
-Gentle, a bit shaky, and dry because goddamit, Gaster, can you just take care of yourself and drink water like a normal person but otherwise very heartfelt and sweet. Kinda tastes like cherry lollipops or sriracha sauce but shhh accept it.
-Has to bend waaaayy down to smooch you, but he can and will do it. It’s kinda funny to see an 8 foot monster basically at a 90 degree angle, and you better tease him about that because it gives his face the most adorable dusting of lavender you will ever witness.
-PDA is everywhere. He loves to hold your hand, link arms with you, and, if you let him, he’ll kiss the literal hell out of your face. Loves to rest his head on yours or have you lean up against his chest because then he knows you’re there, you’re his, and you’re not going anywhere.
-He enjoys whatever kisses you’re willing to give him. Just... smooch his entire face. Return the favour. Assert your dominance. Start a war.
~Burgerpants (Felix)~
-He won’t initiate kisses. He just won’t. Too nervous. Too insecure. What if you don’t want to be kissed? What if you don’t like smooches? What if you actually don’t like him? What if- save him.
-His tail swishes, his ears flatten, his fur and paws get hot, and you can hear the faint rumble of a purr in his chest when you lock lips. It’s an unsure AF kiss, but you know he loves you when he goes as far as kiss you when you ask. He also tastes like cigarette smoke and fruit-flavoured vape, but don’t mention it if you don’t want an even more self-loathing kitten on your hands. You’ll also probably get cat fur on your lips and in your mouth. Sorry ‘bout that.
-Is a bit short at 5′ 9″ (well, at least, to him he’s too short), so there’s a chance that he has to physically move more than he’d like to in attempt to smooch your cheek. It makes it 100000000% more embarrassing, and gives a thousand more situations that won’t go wrong, but he thinks they will anyway.
-PDA is stunted. There is none of it. He’s too Anxiety-Ridden for that. He’s also terrified that Mettaton will see you hanging around the burger joint and fire him as well as give you both bloody ears. He might hold your hand in his paw or wrap his tail around your legs if he really likes you enough, though.
-He’d be surprised that you’d want to kiss him, so he’s accepting of all smooches. But don’t be shocked when sometimes he doesn’t want one. He’s a cat. What do you expect? Cats are assholes sometimes, live with it. You’re the one who went so far as to find a boyfriend in a cat, so accept the consequences of his moments of being a prick.
~Nicecream Man (Nicey/Bleu)~
-This goober loves you so much. Too much. He’s all over you at all times during the day, and he doesn’t ask for kisses before he initiates them. They’re all just sweet nuzzles with his velvety-soft nose with the ‘mwah!’ sound effect afterwards, but he’s too much of a cornball to care how sappy he is.
-You know the Thumper thing? Yeah. When you smooch, his ears twist like pretzels and his foot involuntarily thumps against that ground. He probably won’t fall to the ground every time you two snuggle each other’s faces, but the first time you two kiss, he’s definitely falling to the floor in a melted, lovestruck puddle of joy.
-He tol at 6′ 3″, and he’s very lanky so he most likely is gonna lean down do that he can smooch your cheek. And, even if he is that much of a tower, he still hangs off of your arm (like a child) and wraps his fingers around yours, letting his head rest on your head.
-PDA is everywhere. Like, gross, get a goshdarn room. There are no limits to him, but he will be respectful of your boundaries if you set any. He gives you personalized Nicecream messages within the wrapper, and most are so bad. ‘Love you, beautiful!~~~’ ‘*Kiss* >//u//<’ ‘You’re the light of my life and you should never forget that. If you do, I’ll give this to you again.’ ‘You’re the most perfect person to ever-’ I think you get the point.
-Likes the kind of kisses that are light but chaste. The cheesier the better. He’s not really the passionate romantic, he’s more of the ‘buy them dinner and take them on a moonlit walk in the park’ kind of guy than the ‘butter then up so they’ll screw me’ douche. So his romantic advances are mostly just in hope of cuddles and sweet words.
~Mettaton~
-This darling loves you, don’t get him wrong. He adores every piece of your body and every fragment of your SOUL. He’d trade the rest of his life for another day with you if you were on your deathbed. But he cannot give up his fame. His stardom. You will be all over every media whether you like it or not, and there will most likely be no privacy in your relationship.
-When you kiss, he tries to do it as far into solitude as he can get you two. He wants your behind-the-scenes to be remotely between you and him, because, as you stepped into his life and made him feel things he had never felt, he became annoyed with the fact that paparazzi followed your every movements. It finally got to him with you around.
-He wraps his robotic arms in a burrito around your body, squeezing every plausible area of your outer self with those metallic noodles, picks you up, and then plants one on you; passionate and utterly dramatized, just like him. It’s warm, despite it being metal, and surprisingly malleable. You don’t know how, but okay. You’ll roll with it. Either that situation, or you both are basically trying to meld bodies whilst dancing, hands knowing no boundaries, faces locked in a battle of domination. Pick your battles. Win the wars.
-PDA is a bit of a bitch with the public always trying to breathe down your backs, but Mettaton will always make sure that you’re as comfortable as he can possibly make you when camera flashes begin to stalk you as their prey. It’s not all day every day that the paparazzi tail you both, and only on those days does MTT smooch your cheek and wrap an arm around your waist. Otherwise, he will limit himself to modestly holding your hand or having an arm snugly around your shoulders until you get home, where you’re (hopefully) alone.
-He’s eccentric. He likes kisses with energy, with movement, with... uh... something else going on. He’s a man of passion and vigor, and he strives on dancing and play-wrestling. He also won’t argue if you pin him down and kiss his neck.
~Nabstablook (Nabstabot EX)~
(Background- I headcannon that MTT convinced Blooky to meld into a robotic body once they reached the surface so that he would be more physically pleasing to their new fanbase of humans. Nabstablook wasn’t keen on the idea, but fell for his cousin’s pleads and did it so that MTT wouldn’t be disappointed in him. He never fully became corporeal, though, and can exit his body whenever he pleases).
-Hahahahahahahahaha save him. He doesn’t understand what romantic love is, to be honest. Why does he feel hot in his chest, why is his SOUL feel like its trying to break out of its glass casing? He doesn’t know how you make him feel that way, but he knows that he cares about you and that he feels good in your presence. (MTT soon tells him that he’s fallen deeply in love and suddenly he feels as if he hasn’t done enough for you so cue anxiety).
-His kisses are small and timid, much like him, but you can sense the meaning behind them. He doesn’t take things like that lightly, and you have to respect that about him or else you could very well make him assume he’s inadequate or, even worse, break his heart. He’s also 5′ 3″ in his robot body, so he is smol and adorable and please smooch this bean’s nose because he will blush really hard.
-He shakes when you kiss on the lips, his fans whirring to try and cool his robotic body so that he doesn’t overheat and his hands trembling against your shoulders. He cries a bit every time (and he profusely apologizes) and, the first time you smooch his face, he ends up aborting mission. He n o p e s right out of his robot and that’s probably the first time you see his ghost form. He starts sobbing because he thinks you’ll think he’s appalling and he’s sorry for making you see something like that, so you have to sit him down and go on a spiel that he’s beautiful, no matter what form he takes. Then he cries because he loves you and he’s never heard someone say that about him before.
-PDA is awkward. MTT wants you on every magazine, every TV program, every DJ Napstabot merch item, everything. Blooky gets really anxious when in the eyes of the public, so you both decide that you’d give each other space outside of your homes. Not that he doesn’t love to hug you (because you’re soft and warm and beautiful and he doesn’t know why’d you love someone like him) but he’s bad at life. He has too much social anxiety for that.
-If you want him to blow a fuse, kiss him anywhere but his cheeks. Smooching his neck will cause the most embarrassed squeak you’ve ever heard in your life, his fans buzzing so loud that everything else mutes. He likes being kissed on the cheeks, head, and, once he gets used to it, the lips.
I think that, overtime, you can tell when I got to my favourite characters. Whoops, sorry about that. If you want more in-detail headcannons or fanfiction requests, please don’t be afraid of asking! I’ll happily write you an indulgent fic, if you so desire~
