#uniuniuni

[athousandraindrops]

Apparently this is what happens when your boyfriend over orders uni at work and you both show up for lunch the next day. #uni #unitoast #iswearitsafulltrayofuni #uniuniuni #cooksdayoff

[sonus-silentii]

me: has a report due in like 10 hours, that I haven’t started yet, and I need to sleep

me: ignores everything and has sex with a friend for three hours

[sonus-silentii]

my room stinks of weed and pizza and my new flatmate just arrived and is judging me so hard rn

[sonus-silentii]

i'm so tired my whole body aches and my head is thumping with all the stress of today because i'm now homeless next year and there's nowhere to live and i have a group project in for tomorrow at 9am that isn't even fucking finished yet and god i want sleep

[sonus-silentii]

I have to write a Psychology research proposal plus 4 other forms in a group with 4 other people and no one has done anything... it's for Tuesday... looks like I'm going to be doing all the work which probably won't be good enough :((

[sonus-silentii]

I finally did it!

After years of avoiding it and not taking myself seriously and being scared about it and ignoring it and thinking everything was fine and I was just being silly, I've finally been diagnosed with depression.

I've been put straight on medication and told to go to counsellors/ get help at the Uni too. I cried through the whole appointment, and had luckily written a list of why I thought I was depressed before so I could just give that to the doctor and not have to express it in words, which I could never do. The doctor was really lovely and understanding and talked me through everything and was just incredible, I'm so overwhelmed with everything I was an absolute wreck earlier but now am pleased I've finally done something. I think. 

I just really hope I find myself again, I don't even know who that is anymore because I haven't been myself for so long. Although I don't feel like I can or want to tell my family, I've told a couple of my closest friends in St Andrews and feel good about that, they're so supportive. I feel like I may be able to cope with things, or now at least I'm trying to help myself. 

I can't believe I've waited this long, why my school never helped me with it is appalling and I wish I'd gotten some help years ago when I knew something was wrong. But, I'm moving forward. I can do this.

[sonus-silentii]

To watch Cap 2 tonight, or do philosophy notes?? or both?

[sonus-silentii]

I'm meant to have done a chunk of my english essay but my friend came over for coffee and cookies and whoops 2 hours has gone by and fancy that, no essay!