#urine sample

[deeps-repus]

[jevilowo]

MY OPINIONS ON VARIOUS TF2 SHIPS

For funsies

SCIENCE PARTY:

fun ship, but they're GodComplex4GodComplex and I fear that would only end in disaster

TOASTED SANDVICH:

if there is one heavypyro fan on this stupid baka planet it is me. shout out to menacing quiet individuals who like violence but have a soft side fr.

BLOODY SUIT:

literally The Original toxic yaoi rivals to lovers red blue combo ship. speeding bullet and napoleon complex fans WISH they had our shared update and corresponding voice lines

BATTING HELMET: (scout n solly)

i just think it's really funny trust me on this one guys. have you seen them in the fourth comic it's a constant "yes, and" bit between the two of them. soldier's love language is choking people out.

HIT AND A MISS: (scout n pauling)

like most ms pauling ships, i'm only into it if scout's a cool lesbian. which he is not most of the time.

RED OKTOBERFEST:

AAAAAAAAAAAAA literally the ship of all time save me heavymedic save me. if they don't smooch in the next comic i will become jay pinkerton's personal sleep paralysis demon.

SPEEDING BULLET:

my feelings on it are Complicated. twas my first love (otp) in this fandom, but the overabundance of twinky uwu scout and daddy dom snoipah has built up some resentment on my part. call me back when people stop making up imaginary life problems for sniper to comfort scout over.

NAPOLEON COMPLEX: (Spy n Engie)

literally just rarjack if they were boys and not horses to me and i'm not even an mlp fan. it's alright, just doesn't really stick out to me.

SPYMA:

LITERALLY THE POWERCOUPLE EVER TRULY A LOVE STORY FOR THE AGES or at least the version that exists in my head is. i have so much made up spyma lore it's crazyyy. bonus points if they're polying up they cule with sniper it's quickly becoming my favourite genre of fanart (i have seen at maximum three)

SUPPORT SANDWICH: (spy n sniper n medic)

in my opinion, it is healthy for everyone to have at least one ship they just like bc they think it's hot. for me, that is support sandwich. not much else to say on that the fics are all banging go look them up.

SNIDOS: (sniper n GLaDOS)

hell yeah.

ADMINPAULING:

i used to like it a lot, but timelining implies ms pauling's been working for helen since her mid teens at the latest so i no longer like it. 4chan leaks my beloathed pleaseee don't make them kiss i think it would kill me in a bad way

URINE SAMPLE: (medic n sniper)

there's a lot of werewolf and vampire stuff for these two on ao3 which is pretty fun. and i'm way more likely to find sniper angst under the medicsniper tag than sb and bs which is always a plus.

FRENCH TOAST: (spyro)

have you seen that one animation where pyro gives birth to spy's child and gordon freeman is there at one point. yeahhhh. the ship's pretty cute tho spy would be sooo soft for pyro they'd light his cigarettes for him.

BOOTS AND BOMBS:

THE FORBIDDEN RED/BLU ROMANCE GOES CRAZY I ADORE IT. same team bnb is pretty banging too. bonus points if they're polying up they cule with zhanna.

SPYPAULING:

HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE. imagine. spy x pauling. yuri. that will be all.

SWORDVAN:

SWORDVAN MY LOVE!!! idk what it is about demo and sniper together but HELL YEAH TOP 5 SHIPS FR FR. shout out to the guy still writing monsterous intent, they're like single handedly carrying the swordvandom.

TEXAS TOAST:

I used to think "this is cute" but then my friend got really really into it and that hyped me up into "THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST SHIPS OF ALL TIME" territory. bonus points if they're yuri! shout out to Technicolor California, my current favourite fanfic of all time (it overtook running blind in the interal rankings). oh yeah insert mandatory "no hate to engie and pyro father son dynamic preferers" message here lol.

Ok that's enough I will cover more at some point maybe.

[emilythedog661-tf2]

Sniper Snoozing while Medic does his Work

Medic doesn't mind sniper using him as a pillow which he does often 🙂

[borkealis]

somethin a little different today :3

[princessacexsnake]

Ace about to take a drug (pee) test for illegal drugs here!

Made by me! (x)

[excitementshewrote]

[nonobadcat]

A Blistering Affection - Yandere Dr. Chisaki Kai X Nurse Reader - Real World AU: Chapter 9 Excerpt

Reader discresion advisory:

This particular chapter contains collection of a urine sample in a medically inappropriate, dubcon creepy manner. Full story contains graphic depictions of skin disease and intimate partner sexual violence.

Read the full story at Archive of Our Own

Maybe… Maybe if you told whoever it was about your situation...

You paused at the door, hand hovering above the handle before you looked down at your clothing. While you had managed to wash your face this morning and change out of the hospital gown, you’d still selected oversized sweatpants and a soft, ratty t-shirt to wear while reading. As you heard a third man’s voice, you shook your head and quickly retreated to your stockpile of clothing. A simple pair of slim fit canvas slacks and knit blouse later, you looked in the mirror and found yourself mildly presentable. Cautiously, you made your way out to the living room, unsure of what you’d find.

What you found was Dr. Chisaki Kai, sitting on the couch, holding your cell phone long ways with a model worthy smile on his face. As you froze in the door, he turned his head to face you. As soon as his face was turned away from the camera, the genteel expression became a shit-eating grin.

“Oh! Welcome back, beautiful. Did you have a good nap?” he asked.

“Kai…” you asked in a low questioning tone. “Who are you talking to?”

The grin on his face could have lit an entire city block. His eyes were curled into a full-tilt wrinkled smile “Your parents of course. You forgot to call them this morning so they got worried.” He turned back to the phone and shrugged. “I apologize that I may bear some of the responsibility for her poor sleeping habits.”

“Oh no, no Kai sweetie!” your mother practically cooed, waving him off. “She’s always been a bit forgetful. I do hope you’ll forgive her for that.”

Your jaw dropped.

Kai… sweetie?!

WHAT.

THE.

FUCK.

“Yeah, seriously,” your brother teased. “Not too late to change your mind and bail, Doc.”

Kai shook his head. “It was too late the first time I saw her at the practice.”

Your mother let out a squeal of delight and started to fan herself. In the background, you could see your brother rolling his eyes.

“My goodness!” your father exclaimed from somewhere behind the other two. “Honey, come look at this!”

Your mother’s face retreated off the screen and the phone jumped as she passed it to your brother. “OH MY!”

“What?” your brother demanded, walking over to where your parents were.

“You really own the entire practice?” Your father’s voice was breathless as if he might faint. “All ten branches?”

“Well, a sixty percent share of it," Kai added. "There are other owners."

“The number one dermatologist in Tokyo for five years running!?” your mother gasped, reading the news article.

Kai waved his hand as if to dismiss the claim. "That article is a bit biased. I helped the newspaper's owner's wife with some wrinkles and she's been talking about us ever since."

“Twenty-seven published papers?!” your brother exclaimed. He turned back to the phone in shock. “How on earth did you find time to do all that?

Kai’s grin turned sheepish. He scratched his cheek. “I really wanted to impress my father.”

“Damn,” your brother groaned. “I am so not the favorite anymore.”

Your father gave your brother a rough slap on the back. “Better step it up or he’s getting your room.”

Your mother’s smile was cat-like. Her eyes rolled upward and she bit her lower lip. “Nonsense darling. He has his own house in Setagaya. He wouldn’t want that dumpy little room.”

Somehow, you had expected your family would come up eventually. Deep down, you’d been waiting for some sort of “what would happen to them if you tried to leave me?” to rear its ugly head from the moment you woke in his t-shirt. However, not in a million years had you ever anticipated this turn of events. The doctor had got to your family all right, but not through threats. No… This was far worse.

He’d ensnared them with his charm.

Read this chapter at Archive of Our Own

[butterrfingered]