#useful stuff

[nimblermortal]

Notes on Divorce

It takes two to make a marriage work. No amount of work by one partner will make it work. You cannot simply work harder and this is not your fault.

You are allowed to grieve the marriage even if you are the one leaving. You can grieve the relationship. You can grieve the dreams you had for the partnership. That doesn't mean you have to stay.

You're allowed to feel anger.

Many people will tell you that after a divorce, you shouldn't get in a new relationship for two years. That's fine advice. What they don't think to tell you is that even after those years, your next relationship is going to be, on some level, a rehash of the last one. Your brain has some stuff to work through. Don't take that relationship seriously. Recognize what is going on and have some fun with it. Don't put any serious stakes on it.

[frivoloustidbits]

*crashes through your window* Hey, listen artists: I need you to understand that there's no shame in using stock assets in your art. It isn't lazy, it isn't stealing. Unlike ai, these are images made by artists with explicit understanding that they are going to used in other peoples art. It's the only reason they exist. It's the same way movie makers use stock sound effects instead of creating every explosion sound themselves (Wilhelm scream, anyone?)

You do not need to spend an hour in photoshop creating a lightning bolt when you can go on a stock photo site and find the lightning bolt of your dreams.

UnSplash has tons of photos, unlimited free downloads. Adobe Stock let's you have three downloads a day in the free category without a subscription. Pixabay has images, music and sound effects. Freepik can go to hell, everything on that site is ai generated these days.

Also, you don't need to painstakingly edit out the solid background on an image. Look for ones with pure white or black backgrounds and use a multiply/screen transparency filter to make that color invisible. (And don't be afraid to play with the hue/saturation sliders if you can't find an image in the color you want)

Here are some of the ones I've found most useful:

[jesuislawaffle]

Keeping your data personal: the apps and products that protect privacy b...

[racke7]

So, as I'm once again faced with the possibility that my computer-chair is getting on in years and won't last for forever, I'm reminded of my old "criteria for chair"-picture.

If you have a flat seat and a back that tilts -> You will just slide down it and sit very badly as a result.

If you have a seat that keeps the exact degree with the back as you tilt it -> Your back is now trapped and not-moving at all -> You will be in pain.

If you have an arm-rest that doesn't provide support for your elbow when leaning back -> You don't have an arm-rest, you have a weirdly positioned table, and you will hurt yourself.

The unfortunate reality with these very few requirements? Is that most don't care to meet them. And the few chairs that actually fit these basic criteria are also designed for people a foot shorter than me, so I'm getting fucked regardless.

[child-of-destiny01]

Remove your worldly desires

Desires and attachments are the roots of all unhappiness and misery. God will decide the people and things that are good for your spiritual growth, and remove the rest from your lives that will hinder your spiritual growth!

There's a huge difference between love and detachment.

[daysleftofsecondterm]

You know what? I just realized I'm hording my mom's cleaning hacks that are cheap and (mostly) low spoons.

Toilet Cleaning Hacks for the lazy/disabled/inflexible people with stiff spines (me) from my mom:

How to clean your toilet if you have no energy to scrub: Antibacterial denture cleansers.

Shut the valve close for the toilet itself. (The Little knob that attaches to your toilet behind the white throne.)

Fill that bowl and tank up as high as you can comfortably risk it with water.

Plop 5-6 denture cleanser tablets in your tank on the back of your toilet.

Plop plop fizz fizz 3-4 more in the bowl in the morning before you leave for work or a vacation.*

8 hours minimum allowance to soak and activate the tablets powers.**

Open the valve when you return.

Flush.

Enjoy the minty fresh clean bowl without scrubbing.

I do this once a week now to ease the scrubbing demand. It is still recommended to scrub with the toilet cleansers once a day, but this will take the effort of scrubbing down from Macbeth "out damn spot", to sweeping a lazy cat into the dustpan bin.

*I do not recommend doing it overnight because you'll do what I did once and go piss in your clean bowl, then flood your bathroom flushing the clean tank water, with your overfull bowl water. In your just-woke-up fugue state and have a panic.

**If you have roommates let them know you're cleaning the toilet and the time required to let the denture cleansers do their magic. Try to coordinate the best day to do it. If you have more than one bathroom, make sure to have a sign up to warn others not to use the one your cleaning.

Note: if you live in an area with hard water (scale 3 or above) the denture cleansers will also separate the hard minerals in the water. Do not be shocked or scared if there are particulates at the bottom of the bowl when you go to flush. That's not bacteria or toxins or anything. Its mostly calcium and magnesium, that's safe to drink.

How to clean your Toilet if you have Mold and can't scrub: Vinegar and Soap

Shut the valve close for the toilet itself (the little knob that attaches the water hose to your toilet)

Mix 8 cups of vinegar (distilled white/pure vinegar, apple cider works in a pinch) with 2 teaspoon of liquid soap (dawn works best).

Pour 4 cups of your vinegar mixture into the tank and 4 cups into the bowl

Fill the remaining space with additional water.

Allow mixture to soak for 8 hours.

Open the valve when 8 hours are up

Flush

Enjoy the fact that you have successfully killed the mold in the toilet

Note: This works because you're essentially changing the chemical environment the mold is growing in from an ammonia/hydrating rich paradise to an acidic grease lubricating hellscape. If there is mold elsewhere like your walls, a pure vinegar spray will work just fine. WARNING: Do not do this immediately before or after the denture cleansers to prevent chemical reactions from harming you or your toilet. Give it one day to air out.

HEALTH SAFETY NOTICE: If you have to do this more than once every other month (bi-monthly), you should consider replacing your toilet and getting a mold specialist in your home, to investigate the source and to decided how to tackle a mold problem that could be making your home a fungal danger.

How to clean the lid/seat without too much scrubbing: Disinfectant spray or alcohol/bleach.

No need to turn valves off for this part

Just grab a disinfectant spray like the one pictured above.

Spray every surface of the toilet (soak the seat and lid).

Make sure to get underneath the seat/lid good.

Leave for one minute.

Wipe with a warm washcloth.

If you're using alcohol/bleach:

Get your 90% proof or higher alcohol (I use vodka personally) or bleach

Mix it at a 1:9 ratio (one part bleach/alcohol : nine parts water)

Fill a squirt bottle and make sure to label it as "disinfectant" witht he ratio you're using for safety.

Spray every surface of the toilet (soak the seat and lid).

Make sure to get underneath the seat/lid good.

Leave for one minute

Wipe with a warm washcloth.

Again like mold: this works because your changing the environment from friendly to hostile for any bacteria/virus/mold that may have been moved by the vacuum forces the toilet splashes up and out. It's not clean if you don't address every part of the toilet that comes into consistent bodily contact. The back of the toilet tank you can spray and let it air dry. The external part of the toilet bowl too. It's the internals that collect the bacteria and mold the most, which requires more effort to clean using the tricks listed above.

If you are at all sensitive to chemical smells wear a mask when you do these things. Keep the fan in the room on at all times to ventilate the space. Open a window if possible. Time it so you can leave to do work or shopping while the chemicals disinfect your toilet for you.

Go now my peeps, and clean the most transferable disease spot in your home with the confidence of a 1960's housewife with an MRS degree!

WOOOHOOOO!!! THE TIME FOR CLEANING IS NOW!!!! Thank you so much I’m not GREAT at cleaning but this is gonna help a LOT!!!

[prismakinddesign]

BF *Unsponsored* Creative Resources Roundup

Before we start — quick note: this post includes a few affiliate links, meaning I’ll earn a small commission if you buy through them (at no extra cost to you, of course). Think of it as buying me a cozy matcha (or hot chocolate if you wanna get fancy) for curating this little creative care package. 💚

Now that we’ve all survived an inbox avalanche of “one day only!” deals (for now at least 😓 😮‍💨), I wanted to do something different. Instead of pushing limited-time sales (especially since I don't have any offers for you yet), I’m sharing a few resources that genuinely helped me grow as a designer this year — tools that feel more like gifts than gimmicks.

🎨 Color Palette Pro

If you’ve ever found yourself awake at 2 AM Googling “is this green too green?” …yeah, same.

Color Palette Pro, created by Sam and Chris at The Color Palette Studio, has completely changed how I build accessible, balanced palettes. It instantly checks contrast, pulls colors from moodboards, and even lets you test readability for real humans — because your audience deserves better than squinting.

🆕 Bonus: During their Black Friday sale, you’ll get 25% off your entire order with code RAINBOWFRIDAY (until Dec 1) + early access to 3 unreleased tools launching next year: • Color Palette Generator – Shuffle, lock, and shop random palettes • Brand Color Database – 600+ brand colors to browse and filter • Color Code Converter – Instantly convert HEX ↔ RGB ↔ CMYK for print or web

And if you use my code SPECTRUM, you’ll get an extra 10% off automatically when you click this link. Honestly, it’s replaced my old messy palette process completely.

🦋 Social Butterfly Club

I joined this Skool community thinking I’d cancel after the trial… and never left.

Inside, you’ll get: ✅ A 30-Day Client-Getting Content Playbook to post 3×/week and land your next $3K+ client from Instagram ✅ Bi-weekly coaching and content audits from six-figure designers who give real feedback ✅ Templates and DM scripts that turn “posting just to post” into actual inquiries

It’s made for designers who keep putting off posting (hi 👋🏽), want structure without burnout, and crave accountability without fake-hustle energy.

Membership is $29 a month — less than I’ve spent on pens and markers at Michael’s 😭 — and you can cancel anytime. Join here to get the playbook, live coaching, and templates that help you actually grow on Instagram without cold pitching.

✍🏽 Kind Copy Movement

If traditional “bro-marketing” makes your nervous system twitch, this community will feel like a deep exhale.

Run by a 25-year conversion strategist who’s helped write multiple 2 Comma Club funnels, the Kind Copy Movement teaches how to use AI ethically while keeping your authentic voice intact.

You’ll learn how to: ✅ Use AI without losing your tone ✅ Attract aligned clients who actually want to work with you ✅ Sell with integrity and still make money

Members unlock coaching calls, conversion-tested templates, copy reviews, and community support from 800+ thoughtful entrepreneurs. It’s free to join, with optional paid tiers for deeper support (Premium or VIP). Join Kind Copy Movement

📬 Flodesk

Real talk — I’m migrating here myself before their Unlimited Subscriber feature disappears for good.

If you’re ready to build a gorgeous, minimalist email list without getting charged more as you grow, Flodesk is it. It’s flat-priced (no tiered fees), visually beautiful, and built for designers who want ease and aesthetic to coexist.

Click here to get 50% off your first year if you upgrade before the trial ends (ideally before tomorrow 👀).

🌱 Skool

If you’ve ever wanted to create your own community like the ones above, this is where they all live. Skool makes community building fun and intuitive — great for coaching, creative collabs, or accountability groups. Create your own Skool community

Whether you grab one of these tools or just bookmark them for later, I hope something here helps you breathe easier in your creative process.

You deserve support, sustainability, and systems that make your magic shine — all year long. 🌈✨

— Sha’mya