𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐋𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐜 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬
(From Misc. Songs! Feel free to change any pronouns as needed!)
HIT ME WITH YOUR CAR ❝ Can't handle the heat of the city. ❞ ❝ Hit me with your car. ❞ ❝ Hit me with your car, so I can collect disability checks. ❞ ❝ You'd be my shinin' star if you'd fuckin' break my leg with your motherfuckin' car. ❞
MISS YOUR FRIENDS (EXTENDED) ❝ I feel alone at home. ❞ ❝ Swipin' through faces that I used to know. ❞ ❝ Truth is, I just miss your friends. ❞ ❝ I fuckin' miss those guys! ❞ ❝ Do they miss me too? I hope so. ❞ ❝ I oughta buy a plane ticket. ❞
TELL ME YOUR NAME AGAIN ❝ Is it my fault for forgetting you? ❞ ❝ I can't always pick what sticks inside of my mind. ❞ ❝ Please tell me your name again. ❞ ❝ Please give me one last sign. ❞
FISH HUNT ❝ Not a great car, but it's a good car. ❞ ❝ I brought CDs! ❞ ❝ Listen here, look me in my eye. ❞ ❝ It wasn't hard to find! ❞ ❝ I'm only one man and I live at home. ❞ ❝ That's a story for another time ❞
REALISTIC LOVE SONG (FOR AVERAGE FOLK) ❝ Other boys you talk to just don't know how to treat you right. ❞ ❝ You're still a seven at least. ❞ ❝ You can have whatever you want- within reason! ❞ ❝ We're not the kind of folk who get nice things for free. ❞ ❝ Baby, I will do my best to spoil you. ❞
SEND THIS TO YOUR EX ❝ You just don't understand. ❞ ❝ I see through your clever disguise. ❞ ❝ You manipulate your friends' insecurities and you talk shit behind their back constantly. ❞ ❝ How does it feel, knowing someone like me can find you out so easily? ❞
THE BEST AT SEX! ❝ I'm the best at sex! ❞ ❝ I'm the best sex man in all of the land. ❞ ❝ If I don't answer the phone, they come and break into my damn home. ❞ ❝ Then they hit me with the tranq' dart. ❞ ❝ Thursdays, am I right? ❞