“the only thing more dangerous than loving me is trying to leave me.” + seonghwa (self indulgence is real)
We're both self indulging dw
Seonghwa x Reader // WC: 1.1 K // R: 16+ // G: vampire!Seonghwa, Dracula!AU // TW: implied kidnapping, mentions of slaughter, abusive behaviors (hair pulling, insults)
The growls and howls echo behind you as you run through the forest with all the strength you can muster. It surely can’t be that far now – you still vaguely remember your way there, although your memories seem distorted at this point, manipulated. But you remember the direction you came from, so you force your way through the snow, praying so that you’re actually on the path and haven’t strayed from it in the rush.
The adrenaline is pumping through your veins, making you feel invincible. You know you’re anything but. Your body is weakened, and the past weeks spent in the castle without ever going outside make the physical effort all the more exhausting.
You don’t feel scared. Not now. Not while it’s just the wolves chasing you, no matter how far behind they still are. But you see the sun nearing the horizon, the orange hue reflecting in the snow as it hides behind the trees, and you know that soon, the wolves will no longer be your only worry.
Instinctively, you already know it’s too late. There are no signs of civilization ahead of you, no trace of other humans you could hide among.
And as the hope leaves you, so do your strengths, and you stop in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by trees and snow, your legs aching, your breath uneven, your heart still beating so fast you think it might burst. You force your feet to move forward, but it’s slow, just so you don’t stay in one place, just so you don’t freeze to the ground.
You don’t hear the wolves anymore. Maybe it’s because the sound of your own blood rushing is filling your ears. You don’t believe you could have lost them behind – their persistence is unmatched, and they will die before they give up on their master’s order. You’re most certain about that.
But the orange light disappears in the distance and, soon, the night falls upon the forest, engulfing you in silence even deeper than the daytime one, especially now that your breath has calmed down and you find yourself shivering from cold as you stop in your tracks, eyes trained on where the horizon, somewhere behind the trees, should be.
“What have you been hoping for?”
You flinch at the voice coming from among the trees. You whip your head around, trying to find its source. The snow does a good job reflecting the scarce light of the moon hanging above you, making the night lighter by a notch.
“Lamb.”
The name sounds like a mockery. You pull the coat tighter around yourself protectively, still looking around.
“Are you really a lamb? Time has passed, and I haven’t managed to domesticate you. What are you, then? A bunny, perhaps? Running on the first chance you get as if you haven’t even acknowledged your master.”
He emerges from the shadows, blending with them, as if he’s made of the shadows themselves. You tremble. Not just from cold anymore.
The words of defiance push at your tongue. I have no master, you want to say. But the words get stuck in your throat.
He stalks to you slowly, his face – unreadable. He’s tall in front of you when he finally closes the distance. You don’t look up – not until his gloved hand grabs your chin and forces your head upwards. You have half a thought to still look away, but your body obeys before you can make the choice, tears prickling in the corners of your eyes.
“Or are you nothing but a pig, only useful once it’s slaughtered?”
His fingers tangle in your hair and pull, and you let out a gasp. He forces you on your toes, eyes like steel, taking in your struggle with cold indifference.
“I told you already. The only thing more dangerous than loving me is trying to leave me…” His voice trails off and he releases his hold on you, making you stumble. “But I already know you don’t love me. Then why would you risk leaving?” Tears run down your cheeks and he coos, brushing them off with the cold fabric of his glove. You don’t think you have it in you to fight anymore.
“You know I had to try” you whisper.
He nods. His demeanor is calm now, almost unbothered. It always changes so quickly, you ponder.
“I suspected as much.” It gets to you now. He left the door unlocked on purpose, not by accident. To test you. To check where your loyalties are. “So, tell me, should I treat you as a stupid animal, or as an equal?” The touch on your cheek doesn’t falter. It intensifies. Becomes more intrusive. Intimate. He cups your face like a lover would. “It’s the only choice I will give you, so think it over well.” You thought the question was rhetorical, but now that you hear him say it, you feel yourself shudder.
It can’t mean anything good. Not when coming from him.
“I can treat you as a lost animal, too dumb to think for itself, led by instincts and nothing more. I can take you back to my castle, feed you well, keep you warm, and make sure no harm comes to you. Because you’re too stupid to know better. A half-brained creature.”
There’s a hint of mockery in his words. It’s not a bad promise, you think. No harm. No worries. But what would your fate be if you chose it? Isn’t it him that said pigs are only good when slaughtered?
“Or I can treat you as an equal, and acknowledge you chose to leave me out of your own will.” His touch falters, eyebrows coming together in a look of what you would describe as pity if you didn’t know better than to expect it from him. “And for that, my lamb, I would have to punish you. Severely.”
The choice sounds so simple. To avoid a punishment entirely, or to live through whatever he’s prepared – who in their right mind would choose the latter when the first option seems so mouthwatering in comparison?
And that’s exactly why you’re more than certain it’s a trap of sorts. Because Park Seonghwa’s mercy always has a price – it’s just a matter of the currency it will be paid in. Are you strong enough to endure the pain that would come, or is dignity a price not too high for staying intact, if only for the time being?
Or is it all another game, and no matter what you choose, the outcome will not change?
You eventually give in and tell him your choice.
And only the time will tell if it was the right one.
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