Not the beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees~!
Legit, yo. Bees, even though they create a magical substance that is amazing in peanut butter sandwiches, are freaking <i>everywhere</i> and I can't get away from them or flip
out because people give me enough funny looks for avoiding flowers and bushes as it is.
I will walk a good 4 feet or more around a bunch of flowers or a bush for fear of the
flying monstrosity that is bees and wasps.
I'm not entirely sure what to call this stupid phobia, because it's more a mix of 3
fears into one, apiphobia (fear of bees), vespaphobia/spheksophobia (fear of wasps), and
the fear of hornets (I couldn't find the actual term for it because it kinda gets mixed
with vespaphobia, which I think is a LOT easier to say than "spheksophobia" btw's )
I'm really just scared of anything with a stinger and wings.
Because childhood trauma is like some douchebag who punches you in the gut and then
stabs your pet and kills the rest of your family.
Don't you just love my analogies here?
Having a sister who's proffession in life is an entomologist (that's an insect
scientist for those who may not know) doesn't make life any easier. My sister had to
fill up giant boards of styrofoam for her entomology classes and to help with that, my
entire family started collecting bugs for her while she was off at college.
One of the most memorable bug collection moments I've had the joy and pleasure of
experience of enduring, was on a family vacation/ stopping by my sister in Texas to see
how she's doing during her summer courses. We stopped in Mobile, Alabama on the way to
College Station, Texas because it takes about 3 days to get from Florida to Texas for
us (because the speed limit is a thing my parents are like "Dude. We are not a family
that goes 80 on the highway." Fun fact: they actually yelled that at me when I started
driving on the highway one time. Gosh, ain't they friendly?)
Anywho, so we were leaving our hotel and as we walked outside, we noticed these giant-ass
hornets and their freaking nest right underneith a bench outside. The cleaning people were
too scared to go out there. So what does my badass mom do? Struts on outside, styrofoam
cup and lid in hand, and just scoops up one of those muthafuckas.
I was hiding in the car after running for my life, praying the hornets hadn't see me.
Here's a fun question: Where do you put the captured giant freaking hornet in a car when
you've got another several hours to spend in a vehicle on the highway?
Answer: In a lunchbox that sits in the back with the only person in the car who is absolutely
terrified it is going to learn how to escape it's foamy prison capsule and somehow
figure out how to undo a zipper on a lunch box and then procede to attack the closest person
in proximity, which would be the person curled up as far away from the side of the car
with the lunchbox as they can manage.
I still give both of my parents crap for that.
Because WHYYYYY would you put the object of your child's phobia RIGHT FREAKING NEXT TO
THEM IN A CLOSED ENVIRONMENT?!
Because logic. That's why.
Something that is the stuff of nightmares for me is being held down and having someone
push an angry wasp at me. That and being locked in a room covered floor-to-ceiling
with bees. Yay for nightmares~!
Oh phobias. You so silleh.
