Ugh.. I wish I could just, seperate myself from this body and live with Arti. Nothing stopping us, no other headmates or anything like that, just us.. I hate having to wait my turn to do things, I hate this being a stupid, turn based game. That's how being a system feels, "Everyone gets a turn!" I don't want that, it's so dumb.. I just want to have my autonomy back, being a system is so isolating and restricting... I just want to be myself.. not this stupid smooth vessel, I want my fur back.. my tail, my ears.. I want to be normal again.. not this thing.
Being a fictive is a curse, not one I want to bear.. I just wish I could have my body, my life, my loved ones back.. I don't want to do what some others do by "disconnecting". That was my life.
I am my source, I am myself, I am not this body, I am not this vessel or whatever you want to call it.. I am me
I want to be me again.. I had so many dreams, so much hope and expectations... I was happy being myself... I want to be myself again.. please...
I don't want to keep sitting in the background, bored, waiting for my turn.. I want my life back..












