I drew a silly meme, though I want to see y'alls art aswell! So if you have a fave mugman ship (canon x canon, oc x canon) feel free to join! Same goes for Vixy! (it can be platonic or ship, your choice lmao, this is just for funsies! nothing serious. I WANNA SEE YOUR MOTM OCS or your mugman aus!) Just please tag me, I wanna see it! Hope your day is awesomesauce!
things like suicidal thoughts, self harm, swearing, and other things along these lines will be discussed in this fic, viewer discretion is advised(?) (is that how you say it? Idk)
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Why do these thoughts keep coming back? I mean.. I wish they could stop. I’ve been clean for about six weeks. Which is the longest I’ve EVER been clean in my life since I ever started.. this anxious habit I could say.
Ginny is my new mom now! I mean.. it’s kind of hard to even call her “mami” since it feels like I’m replacing my actual.. mami. I mean.. I miss her. I miss her so much. I keep telling myself she’s at work right now.. that she’s still.. alive. When in reality she’s dead. I.. saw her. Get eaten alive. Even heard her yell out my name.
Cuphead’s my new dad too.. it’s even harder to call him “papi” since it genuinely feels like I’m replacing.. my actual papi. It’s the same as with mami. The same thing happened to him. They got eaten alive both by a searcher.
It hurt. Seeing all of it happen. Celestials. I can’t even FORGET how their voices sounded when it all was happening. How their blood was on my hands and face. It was honestly.. a lot?
I mean. Yeah. They died in front of me and their blood got splattered all over my face, clothes, hands, and even some went into my eyes and mouth. It was.. uhhh.. traumatic? I guess? I don’t know. Never been good at this “feelings” thing.
Vixy is a whole lot like my Tia Valentina! Both are so bubbly and extroverted! And also both love baking! But the only thing is that Tia Valentina.. oh dear.. she got taken by some stupid assholes. Those fucking “policemen”. All because she was in the background of a photo of people protesting. God forbid her trying to go back to her home safely so she could be with her family. I hope nothing like that happens to Vixy though. I mean, thank the celestials that the policemen here aren’t like the ones from Venezuela.. still am scared of them though. Vixy’s so nice. Her hair smells like bubble gum! Or maybe that’s just me.. yep. Just me! Well she does own her own bakery so I wouldn’t be surprised! lol X3.
Teddy is such a nice plush toon/person! They always let me sit down in the back of their classroom while they teach. They even make me some hot chocolate and pancakes with a BUNCHH of butter on the top! They even let me paint on their patches sometimes <3 which is so fun to do. I even put some references here and there Ehehe, they’ll neverrrr know what ANY of those mean.
Mugman is now my uncle! I love him so so so much! My personal favorite uncle.. he’s so nice and has good tastes in books! He also lets me borrow his scarf for whenever I get cold, and likes seeing every single one of my drawings! He reminds me a bit of my dad more than Cuphead does to be honest.. my dad was very kind in some ways. <3
Shelly is my aunt now too! She’s so so sweet and energetic! She even does DIY stuff with me! Last time she came over to babysit she and I made Kandi bracelets/cuffs and also drew together some art! She also reminds me of Tia Valentina with how she acts..
Boris is also my uncle! He’s my second favorite uncle! He bakes and cooks for me every time he babysits me, he’s very responsible and stuff. Kinda reminds me of my mom with how he acts sometimes.. she was very protective in a good way!
Bendy.. I guess he’s technically my uncle too. He’s fun to piss off! And the hate is a mutual thing between us at least. I love pulling pranks on him and jumpscaring the hell out of him, and you might say.. “but Azul! That’s so mean of you! He has the blot!” Well.. BITCH I DONT GIVE A SINGLE FUCK. THAT HE HAS THE BLOT. IMMA KEEP ON PESTERING THE GUY TILL HE DIES! HELL, I’LL EVEN PESTER HIM AS A GHOST!
Everyone who are now my new family members are so nice!
Yet..
I miss the feeling of the rope being so tight around my neck. The sight of swirls coming to view while my vision gets blurry from loosing consciousness. My face getting all purple and the feeling of blood circulation being cut. Not so long ago I grabbed my belt and put it around my neck and just pulled and pulled until I felt it all again.
And just when i felt myself slip.
I remembered that Ginny was waiting to see more of the tricks i learned to do in my skateboard and scooter.. Cuphead was waiting to play games with me.. Vixy was waiting for me to bake with her at the bakery.. Teddy was waiting for me to give them my homemade cookies so we could both go on a read a silly book.. Shelly was waiting for me to make some more art and bracelets with me.. Mugman was waiting for me to show him more of my drawings from my sketchbook.. Boris was waiting for me to eat more of his food while I yap to him about something I read in a book.. and Bendy was waiting for me to piss him off with one of my pranks.
They are all still waiting for me.
I can’t leave them yet.
I can’t leave the ones who are waiting for me.
Even if I can’t actually die because of that stupid potion I drank so long ago. It will hurt their feelings.
I don’t wanna hurt their feelings.. I hate seeing them all cry. Damnit all. I couldn’t forgive myself when I saw Ginny cry when I woke up from my so called week coma.
So i won’t kill myself.
I won’t do it.
Not until they all forget about me. Not until it won’t hurt them all to see me gone. Not until.. they won’t care that I’m gone.
…
GOOOOOODDD I SOUNDDD PATHETICC!! Aughhh! I hate myself even more for just yapping about absolute NONSENSEEE! like.. who would even care about even reading this shit?
Long story short. I won’t kill myself. Not until they don’t give a fuck if I do so or not. So imma stay. Just for them.
…
I love them a lot. But.. the only I can show that I do. Is by staying alive for them.
Would you like to turn this crack ship into a canon ship?
(Vixy couldn't wait anymore, so she would be the first to ask! She's SUPER NERVOUS, back in the day 1920-1930s, women rarely were the ones to ask out men)
(ITS A-OKAY IF YOU DONT WANT TOO!! I just think itd be fun ^^)
FFFUCKING FINALLY. I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK🥹/silly
Of COURSE I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE IT CANON!!!
Don't mind Andy just standing there like a dumbass, he'd been planning on asking HER for a while but she beat him to it💔💔 just a little caught off guard is all!!
The stars would be on the Ceramic family's tail, putting them on edge. Dandy is the head of the department of health, Jessica is the chief of justice and hunts down dip operations, and Mickey is the mayor. Read @myth-of-the-machine if you haven't!
Augustine and Ángel, two of Vixy's friends. She adores them both but feels a huge sense of guilt for keeping secrets from them.
Augustine by @itskindafunky and in the blog @ichor-isles-cinema , he works at a detective agency and police unit!
Ángel by @vioofc and in the blog @taste-of-divinity, does good deeds and works alongside a detective named Rodger!
(OOC: Please note that the ceramics have no involvement with Motm, Ichor Isles, TOD! PLEASE let me know if you dont want your characters/ocs involved with ceramic blog)
