#vmarsandsitcoms

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Logan: Duncan, is that scotch?

Duncan: Scotch with Splenda. Tastes like Splenda; gets you drunk like scotch.

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Logan: It's like this, Wallace. I love Veronica. I love her. We're a team. That's why eight times a week, I go to the strip club. It gives me energy, which I bring back to her.

Wallace: And doesn't Veronica get jealous?

Logan: Nah! She likes it! Makes me feel strong, like a Samson.

[Dick enters]

[Logan shoves him]

Logan: SAMSON!

Dick: Great shoving, Mr. Echolls!

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Logan: I'm so desperate I even brought in my dream journal, hoping it would inspire me.

Veronica: [reading an entry] "I married Alf and we're pretty happy." That sounds nice.

Logan: It was.

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Veronica: Dick, shut up. I can't hear myself not talking to Logan.

Logan: Wallace, can you tell me why Veronica is mad at me?

Veronica: Wallace, can you tell Logan...?

Wallace: Logan, she's mad at you because you said "awesome sauce" instead of "I love you, too." Veronica, he loves you. Stop being a child.

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Happy birth moment, Veronica.

Duncan, creepily, “Normal Is the Watch Word”

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

Let's all pretend Beaver was never born.

Dick Casablancas at some point, probably.

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

I reported Weevil to the INS. Turns out he's clean, but I'm glad I did it.

Logan

[vmarsandsitcoms-blog]

I can convince small children that I'm a witch.

Veronica