If you’re aroace - does your asexuality impact your aromanticism? Which did you arrive to first, and which do you prioritize?
If you’re allo aro - did you realize you were aro before or after discovering your sexuality? How does being allosexual affect your interactions with the aro community, and vice versa?
If you don’t use the Split Attraction Model and/or don’t have a sexuality - how did you arrive to that conclusion? Do you feel like your aromanticism “replaces” any sexuality you might have had, or something else?
Discussion basics under the cut!
These questions are only to jump-start your thinking! Feel free to talk about anything and everything related to the topic, or to branch off in your own topics. We want you to discuss this, not keep within any set of guidelines.
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Happy discussion! ♡Mod A
het-aro here, and I discovered being het way way before aro. In a way, I always felt it, possibly because I grew up in an open and accepting yet still hetero-normative environment where het was the deafult. And because there was zero talk about rom-attraction being diff to sex-attraction, I always thought I was 'broken' for not being able to truely fall in love, and later on a 'slut' or immature for having casual sex and actually enjoying it. in fact my first time was with someone I knew (1/?)
for less than a day. We ended up dating and it was horrible. But, I thought I had to, I'm attracted to him sexually, so there's no way I could want only that, that's wrong, that's a sign I'm not well mentally. With regards to the community, it has been very hard since my country doesn't really have an aro community, we only have ace-com that also accepts aro but it's very aro-phobic at times or simply ignoring the fact not all aros are also aces. (2/2)
Discussion Prompt 037: I'm aroace, and I feel like the aro & ace parts of my identity are inextricably intertwined. I arrived at asexuality first, and because of that I identify myself as ace or aroace more often than just aro. But when I call myself ace, I sort of feel like I'm also calling myself aro, because they're so connected for me. I've found that which one I prioritize depends on what external pressure I'm feeling most keenly at the moment - sexuality or romance.
