Dabi has been sleeping on Hawks’ couch for a few days without the hero’s knowledge as he tries to beat an illness without help. What will happen when Hawks finds him?
dabi being insecure and suffering while hawks tries to chase him down and force him to take some love
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Dabi kneeled right in front of Hawks’ balcony door, hand poised upwards as he struggled to pick the lock. Usually the number two hero would leave a door or window open for him if he was expecting Dabi but great care had been taken to make sure that Hawks wouldn’t see him today or even know he had stopped by.
Finally hearing the tell tale click of the lock, Dabi let himself into the apartment carefully. He had been inside enough times to not be put off by the lack of decorations or general personality in Hawks’ home.
Besides he wasnt here to admire the hero’s interior design choices, instead looking for a place to crash for a few hours while Hawks remained busy at work.
He had been dealing with a minor headache for the past few days but it had quickly spiraled out of control, mutating into a gruesome fever accompanied by body aches and worsening congestion. Hawks got off at 10pm, giving Dabi the chance to sleep for a couple of hours in peace.
Collapsing onto the couch, the arsonist blearily set an alarm on his phone, praying that it would be enough to wake him up when the time came.
This was the fourth day that he had snuck into Hawks’ living room to take a nap while the winged hero presumably saved civilians outside. The alarm wasn’t even necessary until now but he had barely gotten out onto the balcony yesterday before Hawks was walking into his own house. Way too close of a call for him to take the same risk and Dabi would rather let Toga braid his hair again than allow Hawks to see him like this.
So here he was, breaking and entering the apartment of a top hero for what? A couple hours of sleep? No it was more than that but Dabi wasn’t ready to face the truth, especially not in this state. He had worked through enough fevers and illnesses on his own, asking for help or even letting one of his friends? Fuckbuddies? Lovers? Know about this sickness that had rendered him useless was way too much.
A burning sensation traveled through his nose, peaking as Dabi turned his head deeper into the pillow he was lying on.
“hh’etsh, etishh’uh, hh’ktshh” Three sneezes were muffled into the soft cushions, leaving the villian more exhausted in their release. His head pounded as he thought back to the bird hero who was probably out being way more productive than he was right now.
Surely they couldn’t be just friends anymore but the black haired boy laying on another mans couch just to feel closer to him when he was unwell certainly wouldn’t be the one to bring their relationship to the next level.
Groaning Dabi turned onto his back. He couldn’t get comfortable anymore and had long since given up the idea of it getting better for him. In this moment all he wished for was for it to not get worse.
He knew how this worked. A few miserable days in the beginning where he can pretend its all fine, a simple headache or sore muscles, then the unrelenting burn of a fever, and hopefully recovery if he makes it through this stage. He’s shivering again, logically knowing he isnt cold but struggling either way.
As Dabi’s eyes close he feels a single wet, bloody tear drift down his cheek, sticking in the strands of hair that have managed to curl in front of his face.
Hawks unlocks his door quietly, he can feel a heartbeat through his wings as soon as he opens it. Cautiously, and weilding a sharpened feather, he rounds the corner to his living room, sighing in relief as he notices its just Dabi.
Having not heard from him in a couple days, a smile jumps to Hawks’ lips, uninvited and warm, almost like the villain himself. All the same he takes extra care to remain silent as he takes off his coat and shoes.
He had been lucky enough to get off work a bit earlier than he was scheduled, and seeing the arsonist curled up on his couch only amplifies that feeling.
He tears his eyes away reluctantly walking down the hall to change out of his work clothes. As he pulls his sweaty clothes off himself, cringing in disgust, Hawks thinks back to why Dabi is appearing now.
Usually Dabi will text him if he’s going to pop in and he’s never, to Hawks knowledge, shown up while Hawks is working to take a nap on his couch. In fact it’s been a struggle to get Dabi to sleep at the apartment at all, on the nights when his insomnia reaches unbearable levels he ends up staring at the ceiling or watching mindless shows while curled up in bed with Hawks.
This thought alone is enough to make Hawks wander back down the hall to find that Dabi hasnt moved an inch since he arrived. This makes his eyebrows furrow in concern, not only is Dabi a notorious insomniac but he’s also an incredibly light sleeper, even yelling at Hawks one morning because he swore he could hear the water running in the kitchen from his place buried under 3 blankets in Hawks’ bedroom.
(“Birdie I can hear you washing your hands!” Dabi yelled from across the house. Hawks tensed slightly, both incredibly freaked out and impressed that Dabi had managed to hear him. “The water Hawks!” Dabi shouted again and this time the hero turned it off, returning to Dabi who was sitting smugly in his bed. )
He reaches for Dabi’s arm, not exactly knowing what he’ll do when he gets there but hoping it’s a comforting gesture nontheless.
Before he can make contact though, a loud noise starts to blare behind him. Hawks, like any reasonable person, jumps clamping a hand over his mouth as he quickly silences the alarm on Dabi’s phone.
After a few moments of quiet where he has confirmed that Dabi is still fast asleep, his mind gains the clarity it lacked just a second before.
Hawks heart leaps to his throat. “Leave”? Did Dabi set an alarm so that he could use the hero’s apartment but then dissappear without even having a conversation with him. Hurt boils inside of him before he realizes that this is still an odd situation.
Everything about this is weird, the way he hasnt seen Dabi in days, the way Dabi’s sleeping so soundly but with a pained expression on his face, and the way he’s shivering despite being covered in sweat.
The blood still stuck to his cheeks makes the hero panic instinctively as well. He crouches down, gently wiping it away before relaxing when he sees there’s no cut. That’s when he notices just how warm the villain is.
It all clicks together after Hawks lightly presses his hand to Dabi’s forehead and realizes he is in fact running a fever. The hero sighs, no longer offended by Dabi’s strange actions, he probably just didnt want Hawks to know that he was struggling. Damn pride.
With this new revelation clear in his mind, Hawks turns and slowly walks back to his bedroom. Three things strikingly clear to him in this moment.
1. Dabi didn’t want Hawks to know he was sick
2. Dabi is extremely tired and needs all the help he can get
3. If he tries to help Dabi he will likely be shut down immediately
It is these intense and rapid fire thoughts that cause Hawks to simply pivot and return to his room. Still covered in sweat from his work day, he won’t be even slightly helpful until he showers. Praying that Dabi doesn’t awaken in the next fifteen minutes Hawks hurriedly bathes himself while trying to come up with a plan. He can’t outright help Dabi, the villain would be rushing for the door before he could even express some sympathy.
So he has to be discreet. He’ll order some cold medicine and supplies when he gets out of the shower but for now he has tea and a thermometer which he’ll have to convince Dabi into accepting.
The hot water pours over him in shimmery rivulets as he struggles to bathe himself quickly, not wanting to leave one of Japan’s top villains alone too long. How ridiculous.
The absurdity of the situation doesn’t stop the winged hero from drying himself off faster so that he can be by his lovers side once more. The irony of him calling Dabi a lover also isn’t lost on him. In fact it’s glaringly obvious that the romantic feelings he has for Dabi extend beyond sex. And a dirty selfish part of him wants to believe that Dabi showing up tonight proves that these feelings are reciprocated.
Hawks isn’t dumb though. Delusional? Maybe. But not stupid. Although falling for someone he should be turning into the police right now isn’t exactly the best decision he’s ever made, it probably isn’t the worst.
With this conclusion reached he quietly slips back into the living room, relived to find that Dabi is still asleep. In fact he’s almost gotten cuter from the twenty minutes they spent apart, one hand tucked in front of his face while the other rests underneath his chin. Yeah Hawks is fucked. He can enjoy this moment for now though. Gain some pleasure from seeing his sex partner curled up while he isn’t feeling well. Taken care of for once. Hawks knows all too well how little care Dabi gets.
(“Shit is your arm good” “Shut it birdie, I’m fine”. “You don’t look fine, here just let me help”. After a short trip to a pharmacy to pick up bandages and disinfectant, Hawks and Dabi sit on a bench together, quietly observing each other. Hawks gazing into the villain’s eyes, captivated by a single glance until Dabi winces at the tension and looks away.
“Sorry, guess I should patch you up now”. He laughs wearily “Do what you need to”. An arrogant attitude, like Hawks couldn’t see the tears welling in his eyes as he gently cleaned and wrapped the wound. However the hero has watched Dabi rip out and replace his staples without as much as a wince so the vulnerability of this moment isn’t lost on him.)
Yes Dabi was not used to such intense care. This wouldn’t stop Hawks from pulling Dabi’s legs onto his lap though. The arsonist had confessed one night, after a particularly hard day that he didn’t feel touch while asleep.
In slightly sharper words of course. He worded it like a flaw, like it was stupid that someone with as many sleep issues as he had wouldn’t be awakened by a simple touch. But Hawks had also learned that Dabi was clingy, opting to be closer to him if at all possible.
Telling him, without words, that he loved being touched in his sleep even if he couldn’t feel it. The hero runs lazy patterns over Dabi’s legs, nonsensical and winding. Putting rivers and roads all over his skin, like a fantasy map come to life. Hawks finally lets himself relax, trapped beneath the weight of Dabi’s feet and his own exhaustion, he closes his eyes.
Hawks blearily opened his eyes, glancing around the living room as he caught his bearings. Dabi’s legs were still on his lap and the villain was still sleeping soundly.
He breathed out a sigh of relief, checking the time to find that he’d only been asleep for about thirty minutes. While on his phone the hero pulled up his delivery app. The commission now allowed him to order takeout and groceries straight to his home after realizing Hawks wasn’t eating nearly enough to satisfy his intense schedule.
He would love to think that this was a genuine gesture of kindness for him but it was just a way to keep him in the field longer.
Either way, now he has the means to get the things that Dabi needs without even leaving his house. There was no doubt in his mind that Dabi wouldn’t take his help at first. But hopefully, by giving him some space and slowly introducing new things, the villain would allow himself to accept the care. It had worked before.
(Hawks carefully added aloe scented burn cream to his medicine cabinet. He already kept simple things for cuts and bruises, but since his one night stand had turned into more of an occasional roommate, he wanted to be well prepared.
The moment came a week later. Dabi walked in smelling like smoke and ashes falling off his clothes, and with a small burn on his hand. Hawks quickly went to get the burn cream, not offering it to the villain but setting it on the counter in their… his… someone’s kitchen.
He left the top slightly ajar, praying that Dabi would take this as an invitation. An hour later as they sat, practically laying on top of each other, Hawks grabbed Dabi’s hand, settling it on his own chest where he caught the unmistakable scent of aloe coming from it.)
So giving him the care outright wouldn’t help, but he could buy things. The hero added cold medicine, cough syrup, tea, tissues, and fever patches to his cart.
They would be delivered soon but in the meantime he needed to eat something. He had work tomorrow, a grueling twelve hour shift that would suck him dry of life and leave Dabi alone. But he couldn’t focus on that right now, or else he wouldn’t get anything done.
Picturing his lover curled up with no one to comfort him or hold him close made Hawks’ heart twist uncomfortably. To soothe this ache he stood, gathering a blanket in his arms and draping it over the villain shivering below him.
The hero refused to wake Dabi for something as small as taking his temperature, but he did press his hands to the arsonist’s cheeks. This only left his hand warm and bloody, questions on whose blood it was and why it was there saved for another day.
Hawks straightened up, allowing his wings to stretch out briefly before he walked to his room. As much as he wanted to curl up with Dabi it wouldn’t help him to be woken up by an alarm at six in the morning.
The villain needed as much sleep as he could get and Hawks was the last person to stand in the way of that. He was exhausted on his own, barely making it his bed before falling asleep again
Dabi awoke with a gasp, panting breathlessly as coughs wracked his frame.
When the air finally returned to his lungs, he was conscious enough to realize that every bone in his body hurt. The villain gasped, inhaling sharply before “h’etchh, h’itshh, ‘etchiew, hh’eTCHH.” Fuck his head ached and he couldn’t breathe through his nose. His throat felt like sandpaper and nothing sounded better than lying down again.
He grabbed his phone from the coffee table, checking to see how much time he has left before dropping it in shock.
It was four in the morning.
He had slept through his alarm and Hawks had seen him like this. His eyes dart down, just now noticing the blanket that tenderly covers his frame.
When his gaze shifts to the table again, his heart stops, locking eyes with the thermometer and presumably cold tea sitting on it.
He knew and he let Dabi stay. And for what? Yeah Hawks was a spy, but this was going a bit far. And sure they’d fucked a couple times, but this was way beyond what he was capable of returning.
Dabi wasn’t a caretaker, and he certainly wasn’t someone who was easy to take care of. Hawks didn’t want this, and Dabi wasn’t going to make him have it. He needed to leave.
He threw the blanket off of himself, shivering in the cool air. Planting his feet firmly on the ground, he still managed to sway a bit as he stood up.
This had gotten so much worse way so fast, he never should’ve come to Hawks house, never should’ve let himself fall asleep on his couch, never should’ve let himself become so pathetic.
Hawks didn’t need that. He didn’t deserve it. Fuck that hero needed everything but Dabi right now.
And with that thought he struggled to pull his combat boots on, wincing as they yank on his already sore muscles. One glance back at the couch is all he needs to convince himself that he should leave.
He turns to the hallway, almost tripping over a paper grocery bag that’s sitting on Hawks’ doorstep. A single glance into the bag confirms his worst fear, Hawks ordered shit for him.
It would feel so good to take a couple of the cold pills or even the cough syrup because he can’t seem to get his throat clear.
But taking anything would make Hawks feel like he was right to do this. And that can’t be farther from the truth.
Stupid birdie. Trying to save a villain from his own mistakes.
Stupid Dabi. For wanting to be saved by him.
And with that he exits, stepping around the bag carefully and walking down the hall to the elevator.
Theres a villain hideout not too far away from here. A small place, running water in one of the rooms, no central heating but the couch has a bunch of blankets. It’s close to Hawks so Dabi usually crashes there after they hook up.
He’s never regretted having sex with Hawks but sometimes he’s just spent in the mornings. No fault to his birdie, Dabi uses him as a way to blow off steam more than he should and sometimes not even a couple hours curled up next to a guy he should want to murder can fix that. So instead of taking up space in Hawks house while his head hurts and his late nights catch up to him, he goes a block away.
(“I don’t have much food here but I can make you some eggs?” Hawks offers hesitantly.
“Oh? Cannibalism this early has to be a crime” “Ha ha very funny, now eggs? Yes or no?” “I’ve got other things to do birdie than watch you burn your kitchen to ashes faster than I probably could” Dabi jokes.
It’s not that he doesn’t want the eggs. He wants to watch Hawks struggle not to get shells in the pan and then look to him with a pitiful look that would make Dabi run away with him if he did it long enough.
However the pounding behind his eyes begs for another thing and Dabi is sauntering towards the door without a second glance.
“Hot stuff? Dabi? Hey, where you going?” “I’ve got jobs to do pretty bird. People to kill, buildings to burn. I’m a villain. And evil doesn’t rest.” “Pretty sure evil just had eight hours of sleep in a king size bed.”
Dabi leaves without another word, too tired to continue the conversation any longer. Much to Hawks’ dismay, who watches him go with the same expression of a mother watching her son go off to war)
Dabi knows his way to the hideout. It’s out of the way, secluded and private. Exactly what he needs right now. Another cough tears through him, leaving him panting in the back of an alley.
Just a couple more yards and he’ll make it. The wind whips through his thin clothes and he regrets not grabbing the cough medicine as he looses his breath once again.
Once he finally stumbles to the door it takes him a second to open it and shuffle inside. The best room is the upstairs living room. It’s away from windows with a bathroom near the couch. Almost everything Dabi needs to make it through this is stored in a closet in that same living room.
Slowly climbing up the stairs in pure darkness, he lets the tears fall down his face. Times like these remind him of just how lonely he is. He usually doesn’t mind it. Opting to ignore the fact that he doesn’t really have close friends.
When he makes it onto the second floor he grabs the singular box of tissues he had in the closet and collapses onto the dirty couch, sobbing heavily. Some congestion is loosened by his tears and he sneezes twice in the aftermath “hhh’eTCHew, HH’ieSHHH” The tears are falling quickly and he can’t wipe them away fast enough. Red, hot, sticky blood pours from his eyes. No matter how many calming breaths he takes, one thought back to that hero with crimson wings sends him spiraling again.
He wants Hawks here. Wants to cry in his arms. Wants to hear his stupid cheerful voice through the pain of his headache. Wants to feel his fingers ease the tension from his shoulders. And on that couch, surrounded by dust and bloody tissues, Dabi lets himself want so deeply and throughly that it hurts.
He allows himself to need this care so badly because he will never get it.
He’s cursed to only want the things he will never receive.
Greedy for help and concern.
An alarm beeped in the distance. Heavy and annoying, right beyond Hawks’ consciousness. He groaned, these mornings never got easier, no matter how many times he did them.
Despite the tiredness weighing him down, the hero forced himself to get up. His wings felt stiff like they usually did when he got up and he deposited the feathers on his bed while he got dressed.
Hawks didn’t have much time. Dabi had joked that he only gave himself enough time in the morning to wake up and breathe before rushing to work. This wasn’t exactly an incorrect observation. He worked more than twelve hours a day and preferred to rush while getting ready than wake up earlier.
After he’s fully clothed, only missing his heavy flight coat, he walks to the living room. Taking quiet steps as to not wake the villain sleeping on his couch, Hawks comes to the unfortunate revelation that Dabi is not there.
Panic spreads through him like wild fire. Shit. Where could he have gone, the hero doesn’t have time to chase down a villain right now.
The bathroom and kitchen are both empty. Fucking hell where did he go. Tears start to prick at Hawks eyes.
He walks out his front door, breathing nervously as he checks the grocery bag that was forgotten the night before. As much as Hawks prayed that Dabi would take something from it, the bag is full and untouched.
He can’t spend anymore time here though. The winged hero is already going to be ten minutes late and the commission will take away his off day tomorrow if he doesn’t leave now.
With this final hesitant thought, Hawks drops a feather on the table by his balcony door. He steps out onto the terrace, feeling the wind whip at his face despite the visor that should protect it.
The balcony door is left unlocked in the hopes that Dabi will come back and find his way back onto the hero’s couch. Hawks can only pray he’s coherent enough to do so.
Every breath feels like it’s stabbing his lungs. Dabi can’t go more than five minutes without coughing or sneezing. Tissues are scattered over the floor and the Tylenol bottle that he found in a corner of the closet is empty.
There were only two pills to begin with so they didn’t do much, but the idea was nice. He’s exhausted. Cycling between dreams and reality. The two are becoming blurred as he tries to stay awake to avoid the nightmares that are plaguing him.
Lost between desire and pain he stares at the ceiling, reminiscing about another time where he felt this want in his heart.
(“Smoke drifted peacefully off of the cigarette that Dabi was holding. Leaning out a window as he came down from his post sex high, calming his nerves from the intensity of the moment.
A figure moves behind him, with bright scarlet wings and golden hair. His personal angel, sent from God or the devil, Dabi didn’t care.
What mattered is that he had the beautiful man to himself. Hawks comes to sit next to him, shirt still off, talons glistening in the moonlight, eyeliner captivating beyond reason. A winged hero, with honey for eyes, and a smile that Dabi wanted to devour.
He was fucked, hopelessly and utterly falling for a hero. Oh but this hero wouldn’t let him fall. No, his birdie would catch him before he could hit the ground.
Hawks traces the staples on Dabi’s face. “Pretty” he whispers just to the villain in front of him. And Dabi knows he’d say yes to anything the hero asks of him if he just hears that one more time. “Pretty” Hawks says again, reading his mind like no one else can. “Pretty”.
No one has ever called Dabi pretty before)
His birdie, oh how he wanted him right now. Wanted him to hold Dabi and promise to never leave him. But you can’t make a lover out of a hero. Not when you’re a villain.
They were doomed to begin with, even if Dabi did know how to love someone, he wasn’t the one who should love Hawks.
Tiredness wracks his body again and he pushes those thoughts away. He’s alone right now. And he’s okay. Well not really, but he will be okay at some point. He’ll never be fully healed, the scars on his body show that, but he won’t be sick anymore and that’s all the improvement that he can ask for.
A restless sleep falls over the villain, trapping him in fever dreams once again.
Hawks shift couldn’t go by fast enough but now he’s finally off for the rest of today and tomorrow. Perfect for the rescue mission he’s planning.
As sneaky as Dabi thinks he’s being. The hero always notices where he goes when he leaves the apartment. There’s an abandoned building just down the street, they had a meet up there one night and Dabi goes to it on the mornings where he’s extra worn out but refuses to communicate that to Hawks.
After picking up the grocery bag he didn’t unpack that morning, he flies to the building. Praying with everything in him that Dabi is there.
A door opens below him, jolting the villain out of restless sleep. Shit someone was here. He rushes to push the tissues into a rusty trash can and wipes his face quickly.
Unfortunately his coordination is long gone and he just succeeds in making a pile of tissues near the trash and smearing the blood and mucus on his face. He stands up, wavering as he walks to the doorway of the living room.
“Dabs?” Fuck is that Hawks? This is worse than he expected. “Dabi are you here?” Comes the call again. Before he can respond the hero is at the foot of the stairs, gazing up at him.
He probably looks like shit but Hawks’ face doesn’t wrinkle in disgust or wince away, instead he runs up the stairs with a bag in his hand. A bag Dabi remembers seeing just last night, right in front of Hawks door.
“Shit hot stuff. You really scared me there” he laughs.
“What are you doing here birdie”
“I missed you” he says in that cheery upbeat tone. “Why don’t we go sit down, you’re looking a bit pale”
Hawks saunters across the hall, still holding onto Dabi like he’s going to run away. Honestly that’s an possibility right now, with all his wishing that Hawks would come and save him, he doesn’t know what to do now that he’s here.
“Please leave” he says quietly, feeling a slight tingle in his nose as he speaks.
“Huh?” Hawks turns and stares at him.
“Hey Dabi, it’s okay”. Dabi turns and coughs thickly, unable to hold back anymore. In response the hero pulls out a bottle of cough syrup. Fuck he can’t handle this. “Hawks please leave”.
The winged hero’s smile falters. Dabi never pleads with him. “I can’t leave you here like this hot stuff, who’s gonna make sure I don’t burn my house down?”.
“I’m going to burn your house down if you don’t leave right now” Dabi’s tone is harsh and cruel.
He walks into the living room, trying to ignore the symptoms he has just while Hawks is present. “hh..kngt, -nt!”, two sneezes slip out as the hero comes up behind and continues speaking
“Look I know I’m a minimalist but my house is nicer than here. I can leave you alone while you’re there. I won’t even talk to you if you don’t want me to”
Dabi’s silence speaks volumes and Hawks simply turns him around so that they’re facing each other. “Let’s sit for a second” he whispers, leading the villain over to the couch he’s likely been sleeping on for a couple hours, unbothered by the tissues and blankets thrown haphazardly onto it.
“Don’t need your pity birdie”
“It’s not pity, I want to help you”
“Don’t want your help” he groans.
“Okay but you’re sick, you clearly need some help”
The hero speaks softly, “I want you to be better than okay. Even if you feel like shit, I want you to feel better than you would alone. Let me help. I’m not going anywhere”
A silence descends onto the room, heavy and depressing. Hawks opens his mouth to say another few comforting words but Dabi flinches forward with yet another set of almost silent sneezes, “-kgt , hh..engt”
“Fine”, it’s quiet, barely even audible but he hears it all the same.
And with that Hawks stands, giving Dabi a hand as he struggles to stand up. “Here let me pick you up, I’m gonna have to do it to fly anyway” he says laughing, as if every second of this isn’t scaring him.
Dabi allows it, curving into the hero’s body heat, soaking up the warmth that he exudes. Hawks sighs, thankful that he’s being more cooperative. He holds the villain closer as they take off, trying to be careful with his long limbs.
Thankfully the flight is short, only about five minutes in the air before he’s touching down on the balcony.
A sense of deja vu washes over Dabi as he thinks back to kneeling here not even 24 hours ago. Things have gone from bad to worse so quickly, and he has no idea how he’s going to get out of this mess.
To say that Hawks was put off by the villain’s silence would be an understatement. He’s terrified that if he isn’t holding onto Dabi with both hands, he’ll disappear like before
In order to keep him here though, he has to give him space like he promised. So Hawks carefully deposits the arsonist onto the farthest corner of his couch where he was sleeping yesterday.
Dabi doesn’t look at him, instead curling up his legs and staring at the tv which isn’t currently playing anything.
The hero sets the still unpacked grocery bag on the coffee table and walks down the hall to his room to remove his gear. After his visor, headphones, and compression shirt get pulled off, he returns to the living room to find that the arsonist hasn’t moved an inch.
That alone is worrying. The villain routinely waltzes into Hawks’ apartment uninvited, switching the channel to whatever he wants to watch, and asks Hawks to order some food.
Right now, however, he looks like he’s trying not to breathe too hard for fear that he’ll be kicked out. Despite this, the hero turns one of Dabi’s favorite baking shows, hoping it’ll keep him occupied while he showers.
The villain shivering on the couch feels his heart warm when the tv is put to his favorite channel because he was willing to sit in silence for the rest of the night if Hawks didn’t want it on.
After a short period of time where Dabi half listens to the bakers running around trying to finish their desserts, the winged hero sits down on the other end of the couch.
Usually he would crawl over and pull Hawks onto him, but he’s sick right now and needs to limit how close they get to each other. If the hero gets this, Dabi will be even more fucked than he is now.
Without his focus on the fact that he’s still sick and holding back sneezes, the iron grip he had on his nose wavers “hH..ingkt, -engkt , -ngt’ch” Thankfully they don’t slip through unstifled but they’re much more audible than the last ones and he catches Hawks’s worried eyes when he looks back up. “Bless you”, comes the soft acknowledgement but Dabi doesn’t say a word in response. Another shiver breaks through him. He’s been able to suppress them for a bit but he starts to panic when Hawks rises to grab a blanket. “Hey hot stuff, I’m kinda cold” he says pitifully, blanket over his shoulder as he offers his arm to the villain.
Dabi freezes but then moves a bit closer. Not nearly close enough to cover them both with it, but he’s too afraid to cover the whole distance. Hawks isn’t thinking this through, he doesn’t want this.
“Come here Dabs, I don’t mind”
“You’re gonna get sick” he says harshly.
“Nah I have a good immune system, but right now I’m cold so come here”.
And with that, Dabi does move closer, sitting shoulder to shoulder with the hero. Letting himself melt into the warmth of the blanket and the man he’s lying with. The peace doesn’t last long before he feels a strange sensation that forces him to turn as far away from Hawks as he can “hH’enCHH, hhh’ignt, -kngtch, -eKNchh, ‘kGt” The poorly restrained sneezes leave him sniffing until the hero hands him a tissue. Dabi wipes his nose with embarrassment clear on his face before murmuring “sorry” to Hawks. The hero is so taken aback by the apology that he forgets to respond for a second. “No it’s okay you don’t have to apologize. And it might help to let them out you know?”
Dabi nods, sniffling again before leaning away from the hero on the other side of the couch.
It only lasts a few minutes before Hawks begins to speak again “Want some food?”
“I’m okay, but if you need to eat something that’s fine”.
The hero sighs, he wasn’t asking for himself. “I’m gonna make some ramen, I’ll make you some too. Just in case you feel hungry in a bit”
Dabi tenses at the kind gesture but allows Hawks to get up. He returns several minutes later with two bowls of store bought ramen.
Not that the villain minds. Anything the hero cooks on his own should be eaten with heavy caution.
He lets his bowl warm his fingers and face before taking a couple bites. It’s good, despite the fact that he can’t really taste it.
The only side effect is the way the steam is making the congestion in his lungs loosen. He coughs lightly, muffling in it the crook of his arm before stifling two sneezes as well “-ngt, hh’enkt”
“Bless you” Hawks says quietly as he rubs his back but Dabi involuntarily flinches away from the touch. “Here have a bit more of your ramen” he says softly, removing his hand from between Dabi’s shoulders.
But the villain is frozen, his throat hurts from more than just his cold and his eyes prick with unshed tears. “Why do you care if i eat.”
It isn’t asked like a question, it’s a statement.
He’s waiting for Hawks to realize that he doesn’t actually care. He doesn’t want a reason because Dabi can’t see why someone as good as Hawks would want to help him.
“Oh well you can’t take these meds without eating, it’ll burn your stomach lining or something and you already have enough to deal with right now” he rambles uneasily, picking up the bottle of fever reducers to read the back.
Turning towards Dabi again, he shifts so that the villain can read it. But he isn’t looking at Hawks, hands pressed over his eyes in a defensive action.
“Dabs” he says softly, trailing off as he tries to pull the arsonist fingers away from his face. They come back covered in blood. Dabi is desperately trying to wipe away the droplets but they keep coming.
The blood rolling down Dabi’s face only makes Hawks panic for a second before he’s wiping the tears away. He honestly doesn’t know how it took him so long to notice, Dabi’s never cried in front of him, but he still feels guilty for not knowing something so simple about the man sobbing on his couch. Out of all the sad things he’s learned about the villain, this one hurts him the most. He can’t even cry without being in pain.
Dabi turns away trying to hide from him, cowering while still holding his ramen. The hero grabs the bowl from his hand, replacing it with a tissue. “It’s okay Dabs I promise”.
When he doesn’t get a response Hawks puts his arm around the villain. He flinches, violently, twisting to remove the hand from his back. “Don’t touch me” he sobs. Inconsolable. Despite how bad he wants Hawks to hold him it just feels wrong.
He needs it, craves it like nothing else and yet it doesn’t feel right. Dabi stands, shaking fiercely. They stare at each other, desperately searching for direction.
It’s too much, blinded by fever and exhaustion the villain backs up against the wall, close to the front door but not touching it. He wants to leave, to run as far away as he can.
But he can’t slip out the door now, not with Hawks looking at him like that. He drops his head, letting the tears fall softly onto the floor. Dabi is so distracted he doesn’t notice the winged hero walking up to him.
Hawks pulls him away from the wall, wrapping his wings around them both as he hugs the villain. “I’ve got you baby, it’s okay”.
And with those words, Dabi relaxes in his arms, letting himself be cocooned by the man in front of him. Crying into his chest, not even caring about the blood that’s staining his shirt. He chokes out sobs that shake them both, hopelessly giving into the desire to be held.
Oh, it feels so good to just let go. To feel safe and at home with someone else. He doesn’t have to hide here; the hero will hide them both. Together. Him and his pretty bird.
After a few minutes of letting himself just melt into Hawks, the hero feels him start to waver more on his feet and moves them back to the couch. He wipes Dabi’s face gently with the hem of his shirt, softly soaking up the majority of tears.
Hawks just holds him, blanket wrapped around their legs as Dabi calms down. Slowly the sniffling into the hero’s shirt becomes a byproduct of his cold instead of the tears and Hawks grabs him a tissue from the box, shifting them both upwards so he can blow his nose.
Which he does, very reluctantly but all the same allowing himself to take advantage of the hero’s kindness. Unfortunately it losses the congestion in his sinuses causing a small fit “hh…etchhh, hH’ETCHH, hk’inCHIEW”
“Bless you. Here let’s take your temperature hot stuff” Hawks murmurs.
And Dabi has to fight tears back again. How his pretty bird can call him hot in this state is beyond comprehension, but he’ll try to take his words for what they are.
While the villain has the thermometer in his mouth, Hawks takes the chance to speak freely. “Dabi, I want to help you. Through all of this, the sickness and the sadness and everything. I don’t want you to have to run anymore. You can stay here as long as you want, whether you’re sick or just tired you can stay.”
He pauses briefly, “I want you here. I’m gonna take your temperature and then we’re gonna take a shower, and you’re gonna sleep here tonight.” The thermometer beeps, 102, that’s not horrible.
It was probably higher earlier but Hawks hands Dabi two pills either way. “Thanks” he whispers in response. A rare thing to come from Dabi but the hero is being so nice he can’t just say nothing back.
After he swallows some cough syrup, Hawks helps him stand up, leading them both to the bathroom. He only leaves for a second to grab clean clothes for them both.
When he returns Dabi is staring at the ground, hair in front of his eyes. “I’m sorry” the villain says quietly.
“Hey no you’ve got nothing to be sorry for”
“I snuck into your house without telling you”.
“My house is always open to you”.
“That isn’t realistic” Dabi groans.“What if I’m a dick, is it open then?”
“Do you want me to leave?”
“Kidding, kidding, no I dont care if you’re being a dick. I want you to come to me in any state.”
Dabi just shrugs, dropping his clothes and lazily getting into the shower. He hasn’t let go of Hawks since their moment in the living room. The hero doesn’t seem too eager to disconnect either, stripping down to join him even though he showered earlier.
The water is boiling and Hawks yelps as it hits his skin. “Fucking hell Dabs, this is gonna fry your skin” “It’s a bit late for that pretty bird.” “Shut up and turn around” the hero says gently, subtly turning the temperature down.
He grabs the shampoo bottle and pours some into his hands, lathering them together before rubbing it into Dabi’s hair. One thing he had learned early in the relationship was that Dabi loved his head to be touched.
“Go back to sleep hot stuff.”
“No can do, it’s 11am.” Hawks groans, turning over and facing the villain that’s lying shirtless in his bed. His purple scars look mesmerizing in the gentle light that’s flickering through his curtains.
Dabi has been up for hours, doing God knows what to his kitchen and pantry. But here he is again, sitting on top of the hero’s blankets, staring down at him.
“C’mere Dabs” he says quietly, reaching wildly for the arsonist’s face. Thankfully, Dabi moves within touching range just for Hawks to run his fingers through his thick black hair.
He practically moans at the sensation. It’s one of the few pieces of skin that isn’t regularly scorched by flames and the hand running through it right now is heaven. The hero smiles in surprise as Dabi practically shoves his head underneath Hawks’ hand, fully enjoying the warmth of the gesture.)
The villain relaxes again when Hawks starts to condition his hair, letting himself be soothed. After quickly washing himself and letting the hero rub him down with soap as well, they get out of the shower.
Dabi’s muscles ache, burning with fever as he struggles to pull on new clothes. When Hawks moves his dirty shirt into the hamper by the door, the villain catches sight of it.
“It’s okay I’m going to wash it.”
“I can buy more shirts. I care about you hot stuff.”
“Don’t call me that right now.”
Hawks heart breaks. “Hey Dabi, I still think you’re hot like this.”
“That’s not a funny joke. I thought heroes were supposed to be nice”
“I’m not joking Dabs, you look pretty.”
“I’m sweaty, covered in blood and snot and I can’t go five minutes without choking on my own spit.”
“And I,” the hero pauses, “think you’re pretty.”
Dabi turns and flicks the light switch off, looking up at Hawks when they’re only illuminated by a small night light in the corner of the room.
“I don’t want you to see me like this. It’s too much.”
“You’re never too much for me Dabi. Me taking care of you doesn’t change anything”
“Yes it does, I’m a lot of work.”
“I don’t care, I still want you. It’s that simple.”
“Taking care of me isn’t easy, being in my life isn’t easy, knowing me isn’t easy birdie.”
“I didn’t say it was easy, I said it was simple.”
“Easy is something people search for when they’re lazy, simple is something you find when you aren’t looking.”
“This isn’t a one time thing, I’m sick almost every month.”
“And I am happy to stay by your side.”
“No, it’s not, not to me.”
“Im a mess Hawks.You’ve got pretty fucking wings and pretty fucking hair and millions of people who adore you, go pick someone else.”
“Hawks please, I’m not good for you. I’m weak and moody and toxic and you’re” he trails off, lost for words.
“And I’m in love with you.”
They both freeze, the hero recovering quicker. “I love you, Dabi.”
“Maybe so” he laughs “but I’m fucked with you.”
He wraps another towel around the villain’s hair, drying him off quickly. “We’ve gotta get you dry or we’ll be even more fucked.” Dabi just lets him, melting into his tender touch, heart pounding with those words.
They’d never said before, hadn’t needed to. But there were definitely moments where the unspoken words burned on his tongue.
(It was movie night at the villains’ hideout. These intel meetings had quickly shifted from cold conversations to Hawks just randomly hanging out with them.
Tonight, it was Toga’s turn to pick the movie, and it was some American film about a boat and love according to her enthusiastic rant about it a few seconds earlier.
“Oh neat, I’ve never seen Titanic.” “What!” Dabi, Twice and Toga all exclaim. “Well then you have to pay attention.”
And he does, for about two hours of the movie, until Toga falls asleep on his shoulder and Twice moves her to a bedroom.
Then Dabi stands, box of cigarettes in hand, and walks to the door. “Coming pretty bird?” Hawks, admittedly, gets up way faster than is appropriate, eager to be alone with the arsonist.
“Okay don’t look too excited, we can’t fuck in this alley. Theres like twenty STDs on this wall alone.”
Hawks rolls his eyes. “Maybe I just wanna kiss you.”
“Sap, how long until you start imprinting on me birdie.”
“The bird puns have been up recently when we go somewhere alone. Got a kink to tell me about hot stuff.”
“I’m not the one who just tried to undress a villain in an alley, you whore.”
“I said I wanted to kiss you not fuck you”
“And I never said no so what’s stopping you.” Hawks leans forward and pecks him on the cheek.
“Cmon that wasn’t a kiss, barely even felt your lips.” the arsonist complains.
“Just shut up.” Dabi pulls him forward, pressing their lips together sweetly. It’s gentle and domestic.
When Hawks pulls away the villain has to force himself not to whine. Staring at the winged angel in the moonlight makes his chest ache, unspoken secrets trapped on his tongue. So he just smiles and kisses him again.)
Once they both are fully clothed, Hawks picks him up and carries him to the bedroom.
“Oh, that’s okay birdie, I was going to sleep on the couch. You have work in the morning, I’m just gonna keep you up.”
“I’m off tomorrow actually.” Dabi’s eyebrows raise in mock amusement.
“Well still I don’t want to keep you up.”
“You’re crazy if you think you’re sleeping on the couch.” Admittedly Dabi is relieved to hear that he’s not being kicked to the living room like a cheating husband.
Just being near Hawks helps calm his nerves and with the anxiety building up in him right now he needs that soothing presence.
The hero helps him to bed, putting a blanket over his body that’s still shivering slightly. Dabi almost reaches out when he sees that Hawks is leaving the room but stops himself before he can make contact.
By the time the hero returns, Dabi is fast asleep
Hawks simply lies down beside Dabi, not touching him because the man just fell asleep and he’s not crazy. Close to him though, the villain won’t wake up alone.
After about an hour of flipping through channels and restlessly settling on a show about people who were cooking fancy dishes with limited time. Dabi hated watching cooking shows with him.
(“I don’t know why you like this so much, you can just watch me cook. I’d do a way better job than them” Dabi says bitterly.
“Aw, jealous hot stuff?” the hero asks innocently. “You don’t even watch me while I’m cooking” he retorts.
“That’s because I’m not allowed in the kitchen.”
“You aren’t allowed in the kitchen because you dumped an entire jar of salt into the noodles I was making.”
“That was one time!” he replies indignantly.
“I’m not taking any chances, you could always watch from the door.”
“No I’m tired and that’s too much work.” Hawks whines
The hero just rolls his eyes in response, choosing to focus his attention on the TV in order to spite Dabi. The villain snatches the remote, holding it like a stubborn child before turning the show off and locking eyes with Hawks.
The hero turns to him, amused, “Got something to say hot stuff.” Dabi grabs his chin, pulling Hawks forward and closer to him so that he can press their lips together. It only lasts for a second before the hero smirks and says “Could’ve just said you wanted to do this instead.”)
So yes cooking shows were a luxury now despite the extremely pleasant alternative that Dabi had introduced him to that night.
Hawks tries in vain to keep his eyes on the screen, but he can’t help but be distracted by the arsonist lying under his covers. Dabi isn’t lying as still as he was a few minutes ago, instead shifting slightly and breathing heavier.
Hawks’ brows furrow together in confusion. Is he okay? It’s only been about two hours since he got medicine so it’s too early for another dose.
The villain should be sleeping peacefully still.
A muffled grunt is all that he hears before Dabi is sitting up, eyes bloodshot and hair messy.
“Hey, are you alright? Anything I can get you? You were moving around a lot.” Hawks asks quietly.
“No, no, I’m okay. Sorry I’m gonna keep you up though so I should move to the couch.” Dabi responds hoarsely. His voice crackling from disuse. “hhh..eshh, h’etshh, -etshhh”
“Woah, that’s not what I meant hot stuff. I’m not kicking you to the living room. What can I do?”
“Nothing, I just can’t sleep, feel sick.”
“Do you want me to grab my humidifier, we can also try some cough drops or maybe some tea?” Hawks feels lost in his own room. Theres a villain sitting in front of him, clearly miserable, whose entire mission seems to be getting away from him and hiding any desires he might have.
“No, it’s okay. I promise, I’m just going to try and go back to sleep.” Dabi says. His voice breaks in the middle as he tries to hold back tears. Hawks is right there, if there was ever a time to ask for it, it would be now.
But that’s too far, he can’t expect that of the hero. Plus the last thing he wants is for his birdie to get sick because he can’t sleep by himself. He’s not a child, he can fall asleep on his own. He shouldn’t need anything else. The hero has done enough.
Whether it’s the fever or the vulnerability of the situation, Hawks sees a singular bloody tear run down Dabi’s face.
He hasn’t realized how emotionally taxing this was for the villain. “Hey, hey, it’s alright. I can sleep on the couch for the night. That way you can get some sleep without me shifting around or watching a show.”
Dabi almost bursts into tears.
The last thing he wants is for the hero to leave. Shit he should’ve just stayed quiet and still. Another sneeze sneaks up on him, only leaving time for the villain to pinch his fingers around his nose, “-…ngt!,-…kt, ….’engt”
Maybe if he wasn’t so fucking ungrateful for having a bed to sleep in and a man beside him, then Hawks would stay.
He just wants Hawks to stay, he doesn’t want to be alone right now. However he isn’t going to force the hero to remain by his side when it’s clear that he just wants an easy escape.
Dabi should’ve expected it. Theres no reason for Hawks to stay.
He’s sticky with sweat and covered in burns, not to mention the fact that he can’t go five minutes without coughing or sneezing. God, the villain would want to get away from himself too. Spoiled, lying in someone else’s bed and yet still wanting more.
Unnerved by Dabi’s silence, the hero shifts closer to him. It looks like he’s trying so hard to keep it together. Those walls are back up, thick and unmoving. “Hey don’t hold them back again it’s okay. And bless you”
He’s shaking, skin quivering under the weight of unsaid words. Dabi finally looks at him, fear and desperation in his eyes.
Hawks leans closer, “Yeah? What’s up?”
The villain freezes, words on the tip of his tongue.
“Anything you want Dabi. Anything, I promise you.” He says reassuringly.
“Can you just” he pauses again “Stay?”
It’s said so quietly that Hawks would’ve missed it if he wasn’t looking right at the villain. Dabi immediately backtracks.
“Sorry, sorry, I know you want to go to the couch. That’s okay, I’m fine I swear just” His voice breaks, trembling almost violently as he tries to finish his sentence.
“No, hey I’m here I’ll stay. Of course I’ll stay.” Hawks promises. “I’m not going to leave you. I said I wasn’t going anywhere in the bathroom remember? I’m right here.”
He crosses the distance between them, holding Dabi in his arms. It’s so clear to him now, he doesn’t know how he missed it.
“You said you wanted to go to the couch” the arsonist chokes out between sobs over being cradled so gently. He never knew touch could feel this sweet, that he would crave it like this.
“I only wanted you to be more comfortable, I’d much rather stay here with you.” He murmurs softly. “Shhh, it’s alright. I’ve got you. I’m not leaving.” Dabi becomes limp in his arms.
“Don’t wanna get you sick.” He protests weakly. “I’m worried about you right now. Let’s focus on getting you to sleep.”
Reassured for the time being, the villain lets himself relax. Breathing in stuffily with his head against Hawks’ chest.
He gets pushed even closer to sleep when the hero begins to brush his hands through his hair. Letting them pour over his head, soothing and mesmerizing.
He’s safe here. Safe beneath blankets and the gaze of a winged man with golden eyes.
“Hawks” he says, barely audible. “Yeah? You need anything else.” Dabi shakes his head softly before opening his mouth, “I love you too birdie.”
Hawks simply kisses his forehead, gentle in all that he does. “Pretty” he whispers to the arsonist lying on his chest. “My pretty Dabi.” He starts to hum. A soft rhythmic noise that ebbs and flows. Coaxing the villain closer and closer to sleep.
“Pretty?” Dabi asks quietly.
“Beautiful.” Hawks replies.
