Dean was passing by the modest jewellery shop when his eyes suddenly went on the display and he haulted, eyes catching a single ring that was on a small ring box, silver metal with a single blue stone sitting beautifully on the plush bedding. It was really beautiful yet simple.. He hesitated for minute, mentally tallying the cards he has and which one he should use. He made up his mind shortly and went inside. The sales girl looked up from the counter and gave him a smile. He smiled back and asked her to show the ring on the display. She brought it over and told him this is a very pretty ring and who is the lucky girl. Dean just gave a smile and said that he himself is the lucky one indeed. The girl gave him a huge grin and said that he is really romantic. Dean laughed, paid for the ring and left.
When he got home, Sam was in the study, pouring over some map and a thick book was open beside him. Dean rolled his eyes and said that he got them dinner. Sam hurrumphed and kept studying the map. Dean went to the kitchen to plate the food, grabbed two beer bottles and came back into the study. Sam did not look up. He put the plate and beer beside Sam and sat opposite him, and ate his food silently, occasionally eyeing his brother. After few minutes, Sam looked up and told Dean that they might have a breakthrough for the case. Dean half listened to him, contemplating something.
When Sam stopped, he looked at him and said, 'Let's get married '..
Sam's jaw dropped and he looked like a fish outside the water. He found his voice after few tries and croaked, 'What! Are you nuts? Thats illegal!'
Dean sniggered and said 'So is shanking people and hunting demons. But we do it anyway.'
Sam gave him a long look, and shrugged, and said "Yes."
Dean was startled, he looked at Sam suspiciously and said, "Yes? You said Yes right?"
Sam shrugged again and said that after what they have done and been doing, marriage among brothers seems the least problematic.
Dean got up, pulled out the ring box out of pocket, got the ring out, took Sam's hand and slid the ring into his rong finger.
Sam was stunned, kept looking at the ring. Dean patted on his back and said "hey, no chick flick moment, ok?"
Sam nodded, still looking at the ring. Dean left the room, but before leaving, he looked back and saw Sam looking at the ring with a tiny smile on his face.
Dean smiled to himself, already planning where to register for the marriage and what names they should use so it doesn't raise any suspicious brows.
The next day they went to interview the witness. While driving, Dean sneaked a glance at Sam's hand sitting on his knee, and saw the ring on his finger.
Can't stop thinking about how many sweet moments we missed out on because Jack wasn't a baby.
Dean would teach Sam how to prepare bottles and change diapers because Dean had a lot of experience from raising little Sam, while Sam had almost no contact with babies and only knew the theory without the practice.
"No, Sammy, try it on your wrist first," Dean instructs, cradling a fussy Jack in his arms while Sam checks to make sure the milk is not too hot, then hands the bottle to Dean, who deftly shifts Jack in his arms, feeding the bottle into the chubby little hands.
As Jack smacks his lips contentedly, looking up at Dean with his big eyes, Dean smiles softly, muttering to himself, "So, buddy, is it good? Yeah, I know. Just wait until you're old enough to eat hamburgers and hot dogs." Sam stifles a soft chuckle as he watches the sight before him.
Changing diapers is much more difficult than preparing food. Little Jack twists and grabs the box of wipes, yanking them out one by one and throwing them on the floor with interest.
"That's impossible," Sam breathes out resignedly, trying to simultaneously hold Jack down, push the baby powder away, and open the diaper, while Dean chuckles lightly, finally deciding to help his brother.
"Compared to you, Jack is a real sweetheart. I still haven't forgiven you for that time you peed on me."
"I was one year old, Dean."
"And even then you knew exactly what you were doing."
The nights were the hardest. The hunter life never allowed them the luxury of a healthy eight hours of sleep, but it seemed that little Jack was testing their strength.
At first, they took turns on duty. A portable crib on wheels was brought into the room of one of them and at first Jack fell asleep like any other child, but starting at two in the morning the baby began to whine, refusing a bottle and making it clear that he also didn’t need a diaper change.
The system of shifts lasted for three weeks until they finally came to an understanding of what Jack wanted.
The baby liked Dean's room much more than Sam's, and Dean couldn't help but be proud of that fact, raising an eyebrow meaningfully in Sam's direction when Jack instantly calmed down when he was in Dean's room. However, the room wasn't enough, and the baby slept much more peacefully with both of them present, sprawled out in the middle of the bed, while Dean and Sam settled down on either side of him, whispering.
"I remember when you were this little. You couldn't sleep without my finger in your palm," Dean tells him quietly, watching the baby fidget slightly in his sleep, his eyes nervously squeezing. Sam immediately hurries to put his big, warm hand on Jack's stomach, stroking it, and the baby immediately relaxes his previously drawn-together eyebrows.
"It's still a habit," Sam admits, stubbornly not looking up when Dean hums, wordlessly asking Sam to explain. "I still sleep better when you're around. It's hard to sleep without you," and this time Sam meets his gaze, watching as Dean studies his face, slowly moving his eyes, swallowing loudly.
"Why didn't you tell me this?"
Dean sounds disappointed, and it looks like he's about to lecture Sam, but little Jack lets out a long, whiny breath between them, and this time Dean reaches out, taking the little hand in his own gently, watching as Jack squeezes his thumb tightly in his little fingers, calming down.
Sam shrugs lightly, tilting his head to the side slightly. "Didn’t think it was that important".
"Of course it’s important, Sam," Dean argues immediately, trying to make his voice firmer, but because he's whispering it doesn't sound intimidating at all. "Everything about you is important to me. Always".
Sam can't think of anything to say to that.
He focuses his gaze on the way Jack continues to squeeze Dean's thumb in his hand, and instantly becomes frustrated that he doesn't have those memories of his own. He remembers Dean caring for him, but he can barely remember how. He knows it's stupid, almost no one has memories from that age, and yet, somewhere deep inside, he wishes he could remember holding Dean's finger to help him sleep.
"You can..." Dean begins, quickly clearing his throat and looking down at sleeping Jack. The baby seems like the safest place to look at right now. "You can come to me. We can sleep together if you need it. I don't mind".
Sam really wants to look at him, but he doesn't. Instead, he gently takes Jack's other hand in his own, smiling when the baby squeezes his finger as well, not letting go.
"We're practically sleeping together now," Sam tells him, even though he knows that's not what Dean meant.
Dean clicks his tongue loudly, causing Jack to flinch slightly, and Dean immediately softens, uttering a quiet “sorry, buddy” before looking at Sam. '"You know what I mean," Dean mutters. "You can think it's not important all you want, but you're my priority. Always. So just come over, okay?"
Sam hesitates slightly before nodding in agreement. Dean nods back for some reason, then lowers his head, which he'd been propping up with his hand, onto the pillow, closing his eyes. Sam watches Jack closely for a moment to make sure he's breathing and not pinching his little nose, but when Dean's free hand weaves gently through his hair, Sam doesn't bother to keep his heavy eyelids open. He follows Jack into sleep, lulled by Dean's gentle strokes and Jack's soft smacking sounds.
With a good enough feeding and sleeping schedule they fall into routine, watching the baby grow by leaps and bounds. Jack is teething, and soon they begin the process of introducing solid foods. Jack absolutely hates boiled broccoli that ends up on the floor (Sam blames Dean for this), but he loves cereal, which Dean soaks in milk for him (Sam doesn't believe it when Dean says that Sam loved it as a baby).
When Jack takes his first tentative steps, Sam and Dean hold their breath. They’re in the library, the tables and chairs pushed against the wall, and Sam is sitting on the floor, his long legs spread, his arms stretched out in front of him, while Dean holds Jack at the other end of the room, helping him to steady himself. Jack steps timidly at first, looking at Sam as if he is waiting for approval, and when Sam smiles widely and says, "Come here, sweetheart," Jack happily steps forward on his little chubby legs, falling into Sam's arms, while Dean claps his hands behind him and runs up to them, enveloping Sam and Jack in his arms.
That night, Jack sleeps soundly in his crib, cuddling the stuffed bear Sam bought for him in the baby section of the store.
"Do you remember when I took my first steps?" Sam asks quietly, watching the baby in the crib while Dean, who is lying behind him, tosses and turns, throwing his heavy arm around Sam's waist and pressing his nose into Sam's neck, exhaling loudly.
They've been sleeping together for months now, and Sam politely ignores the fact that Dean, in addition to his bed, gives him hugs, which help Sam sleep better than ever.
"Of course," Dean whispers into the back of his head, and Sam tries to suppress the shivers that rise up his body from Dean's deep, sleep-clouded voice. "Dad helped you to your feet, and I was waiting for you across the room, like you were waiting for Jack. You looked at me, called "Dee!" and came to meet me. You were in such a hurry that you tripped over your own feet and fell, immediately starting to cry, but Dad and I were so happy to see you take your first steps that we couldn't stop smiling. You were always a cute kid, Sammy," Dean tells him, and even without seeing his face, Sam knows his brother is smiling.
Dean pulls him closer, and Sam finds Dean's hand, lacing their fingers together. Jack twitches slightly in his crib, and Sam prepares to get up to make sure he's okay, but when the baby turns his head, Sam sees that Jack is smiling too, as if he somehow understands their conversation and can't help but smile just like Dean. Sam chuckles lightly.
"Sleep, Sammy," Dean whispers to him, and Sam obediently closes his eyes, clutching Dean's hand to his chest. Before Sam falls asleep, he whispers a soft "thank you for always taking care of me," and receives a light imprint of Dean's lips on his sensitive neck.
When Jack says his first word, they get into an argument.
This happens in the library. Dean and Sam are busy researching and finding new cases for active hunters, while Jack sits in his high chair, eagerly soaking cereal in milk himself, and then throwing it into his mouth. Small hands clap on the plastic table in front of him, and when the claps are replaced by a loud and ringing "Dada!" Sam and Dean simultaneously throw their heads up, looking at Jack with wide open eyes.
"What did you say, buddy?" Dean asks dully, and Sam feels how he holds his breath, freezing. But when Jack clearly and joyfully shouts "Dada!" again, Sam and Dean look at each other before laughing happily and taking turns kissing little Jack on his soft baby head.
However, the euphoria of this moment doesn’t last long, and within a few minutes Dean and Sam are actively arguing about who exactly Jack was talking to.
"He looked at me when he said ‘dada’ the second time," Sam argues, wiping milky streaks on the baby's face.
"But you don't know which of us he said it to the first time," Dean counters, pouring more cereal into the bowl of milk. Jack immediately hurries to stick his fingers into it, stealing a few cereals into his mouth. "Besides, he clearly wanted to say Dee, but he ended up saying Da."
"And how long have you been an expert in baby talk exactly?" Sam snaps, letting Jack grab his index finger and dip it into milk, stirring the soggy cereal.
"I raised you, so long enough! Your first word was Dee, just like Jack's. It's not my fault I have that effect on kids. If Jack had called you, he'd probably have said Mom. I think even a kid would have noticed your princess hair," Dean responds in the same tone, relaxing his hand as Jack tugs at his shirt sleeve.
They're too busy glaring at each other to notice Jack grabbing Dean's finger and bringing it up to Sam's, entwining them together. They both startle, looking at the baby, and when Jack holds their intertwined fingers tightly in his small hands and happily says "Dada!" again, lifting Sam and Dean's fingers from his cereal bowl for a second and then lowering them back down, Sam and Dean stare at Jack for a long moment, then look at each other, knowing the argument is over. Jack was clearly talking to the two of them.
That night, when Sam is back in Dean's warm arms, he gets two little kisses, one on the back of his neck as usual, and one on his cheek, and he knows it's an apology. He accepts it, pressing a kiss to the back of Dean's hand, pulling him closer.
Jack is learning new words, and now Sam and Dean try to include him in their conversations. When they go to the store to stock up on groceries and buy Jack new clothes (the boy is growing out of everything they have way too quickly), Jack happily points out the things he knows the names of, and Sam and Dean nod encouragingly, to which Jack giggles, clapping his hands.
In the vegetable aisle the child grimaces as Sam approaches zucchini, and Sam realizes with horror that Jack's face is an exact mirror of Dean's, who grimaces as Sam confidently places the vegetables in the cart.
"Gross," Jack tells Sam in all seriousness, while Dean nods, earning a light punch to the shoulder. The child needs his vegetables, and Dean is not helping him at all to ensure that Jack has a proper diet.
However, in the cereal section, Jack's face brightens and he vigorously bounces in the cart as Dean loads several boxes of his favorite cereal under Sam's disapproving gaze.
"You're spoiling him," Sam whines, but puts in a few bottles of milk anyway. Jack can eat solids, but the habit of soaking his cereal that Dean taught him hasn't gone away.
"Someone's got to be a good cop, Sammy," Dean smiles at him sweetly, and when Jack immediately repeats, "Sammy!" Dean laughs, kissing the baby on his chubby pink cheek.
When they get to the checkout, the older woman behind the counter smiles brightly at them, grinning at the way Jack is blowing raspberries.
"You have a very cute son," the woman tells them, and Sam immediately feels Dean tense up next to him.
It wasn't anything new, for some reason they never understood, people had always assumed they were a romantic couple, and over time it had become something of a routine. Most of the time, they'd calmly explain that they were brothers, getting an embarrassed apology in return, and sometimes, when they were in a good mood, they'd play along, making up a story about them being husbands traveling around the States, who'd gotten married a week ago and were still on their honeymoon, and couldn't keep their hands off each other. But no one had ever assumed they were fathers, and that was a little disconcerting.
Most of the time, if they were out with Jack, they weren't together. It seemed more sensible for one of them to stay with Jack at the playground while the other did the grocery shopping. Sam had caught a few interested glances from local mothers who were watching with affection as Sam pushed Jack on the swings. One time, the girl very actively offered her services as a nanny to Dean, explaining that it was 'surely not easy for him to be a single father to such a wonderful boy.' However, neither of them was sure what to do now.
Two men who would actively explain that this wasn't their child would probably attract a lot more attention than a quiet gay couple with their young son. But Dean is tense and wary next to him, and Sam picks up on his nervousness, trying to pull himself together enough to answer the woman, who had also begun to notice their hesitation.
The awkward silence between them is broken by Jack, who grabs Sam's hand with his small fingers and simultaneously tugs at Dean's jacket, loudly saying "Daddys!", to which the woman immediately laughs again, nodding in agreement.
"That's right, your dads are very lucky to have you. But it seems like they could use a few hours of extra sleep," she says understandingly, looking at Sam, and he finds the strength to smile and nod slightly.
On the way home, Jack looks out the window with interest, pointing at all the objects he knows the names for. The music from the radio mixes with happy children's exclamations, which consist of "car!", "tree!", "cat!" and Sam supports him, but he looks warily towards Dean, who still hasn't said a word. Dean's hands are nervously gripping the steering wheel, his eyebrows are drawn together, and Sam wants to ask what's wrong, but decides to wait until they get to the bunker.
When the groceries are put away, and Jack is sitting comfortably on Sam's lap, looking at the pictures in the book, Sam again quickly glances at the silent Dean before clearing his throat and deciding to break the silence first.
"What's wrong?" Sam says firmly, and when Dean slowly raises his green eyes to him, Sam already knows that Dean wants to wave him off, but he doesn't give him that chance. "And don't tell me that everything is okay. You haven't said a word since we left the store, so spill."
Jack points to the colorful page in his arms, confidently saying "ball!" and Sam is distracted for a second, running his hand through Jack's soft hair approvingly and giving a soft "that's right, sweetheart" before turning his attention back to Dean, who now looks scared and unsure, and Sam doesn't like it when his brother looks like he's lost confidence in himself.
"Is it because of what that woman said?" Sam asks, and when Dean looks down silently, Sam knows he's hit the nail on the head. "Come on, Dean, it's not that serious. People always think we're a couple, it's not new."
"But it is, Sam," Dean argues quietly, clenching and unclenching his fingers. "What she said is new. And it's true."
And it seems that when Dean says these words out loud, he begins to believe them completely, which scares him even more.
"What exactly is true, Dean?"
"Jack... We are his parents, Sammy. This is not a child that we need to babysit for a while until his mother comes and takes him home. Because no one is coming for him, he is our responsibility until the very end," Dean tries to explain to him, but Sam still doesn’t understand what exactly the problem is.
They knew about it from the very beginning. They knew that Kelly most likely would not survive the birth, they knew that raising a baby would fall entirely on their shoulders. And Sam also knows that this is not what scares Dean at all. Sam knows that Dean loves Jack, he sees it in every movement and look in Dean's eyes, in every caring wipe of the baby's mouth and in every soft kiss that Dean leaves on Jack's forehead every night before falling asleep. It's something else, something deep inside that Dean doesn't want to share even with him.
"What are you trying to say, Dean?" Sam tries carefully, not taking his eyes off his brother. Sam feels Jack put the book down, replacing it with Sam's hand, examining the bracelet on his thin wrist.
Dean hesitates for long minutes, but Sam waits patiently for his answer. He wants to hug him. He wants to take away all of Dean's worries, to never see him so broken and lost again, but to do that, he needs to know what exactly is bothering Dean.
Dean shakes his shoulder, looking sadly at Jack, who is playing with the leather straps on Sam's wrist. "I'm a bad parent, Sammy, and Jack deserves better."
Dean's words hang in the sticky, uncomfortable silence between them. Even Jack seems to go quiet in Sam's arms, as if letting the adults talk, and Sam feels his heart give a painful thump in his chest.
"That's not true, Dean," Sam tells him firmly, but he can see that Dean doesn't believe him.
"That's true, Sammy, and we both know it. I grew up under Dad's command my entire life. Emotions are weaknesses, tears are a privilege for girls, arguments are settled faster with fists, shoot first, think later. I grew up with those rules, and I don't want Jack to grow up like that. But I just don't know any other way, and..." Dean waves his hands helplessly, not knowing how to continue his thought.
Sam feels the traitorous tears creeping up his eyes, and he quickly blinks them away.
"You raised me, Dean," Sam tells him, ignoring the tremor in his own voice. "You were more of a father to me than dad was, and all I remember from my childhood is how you cared for me and loved me no matter what. You were the one who treated my knees when I fell off my bike, you were the one I told about my first girlfriend, and you were the one who taught me everything I know. And I wouldn't trade that for any picture-perfect dad."
Sam sniffles and notices the wet streaks of tears on Dean's face, which he immediately hurries to wipe away, lowering his head and resting his elbows on his thighs.
"And I know you love Jack. And I know Jack loves you, too. And the fact that you don't want to raise Jack the way our father raised us says a lot. This already shows that you are a good parent."
Sam pauses for a moment, catching his breath and quickly wiping the tears from his own face.
"I don't know what I'd do without you, Dean. So don't ever doubt yourself or what you do. You hold our family together and I will forever be grateful to you for that."
Sam watches in pain as Dean's shoulders shake with his silent sobs and he's about to cross the distance between them to wrap his arms around his brother, but Jack beats him to it. The little boy carefully lifts himself from Sam's arms and then slowly walks up to Dean, looking worriedly into his downcast face, cupping it in his small hands. When Dean finally lifts his head to look at Jack, Sam holds back a sob. He was never able to hide his emotions when he saw Dean in such a state.
Jack studies Dean's face for a few more seconds, and then he stands up on his tiptoes, kissing Dean's prickly salty cheek and saying a soft, warm "love you, daddy," before his small hands reach for Dean's neck, pulling him into a clumsy, childish hug.
Sam watches as Dean cries harder as he holds Jack close, but Sam is relieved to realize that Dean is crying out of happiness.
Dean kisses the top of Jack's head, grinning wetly. "Love you too, buddy," Dean whispers in his ear, and Jack giggles happily.
Sam comes over to them at that moment, wrapping his long arms around the both of them, resting his forehead on Dean's temple, and when Dean turns his head slightly, rubbing his nose against Sam's, Sam mirrors his wet grin, leaving light kisses on the top of Jack's head and Dean's forehead, smiling.
That night, when Sam is almost asleep, he feels Dean bury his face in his long hair and whisper "love you so much." Sam replies "love you more" and hears Dean chuckle.
Soon, Jack's favorite word becomes "kisses." He loudly demands them in the morning, squeezing between the sleeping Dean and Sam and waking them up with an enthusiastic "kisses!", patiently waiting for Sam to sleepily kiss the top of his head, and then waking Dean, who will throw Jack down on the bed and start kissing his face while Jack bursts into laughter.
The next time Jack demands his share of kisses is at lunch, while Sam and Dean are busy working, while Jack is actively playing with cars in the library, rolling them around the shelves of old books.
"Kisses!" Jack proclaims, walking up to Sam and holding out his hands. Sam immediately looks up from his laptop, smiling warmly at Jack and kissing the top of his head. Jack then quickly runs around the table, approaching a focused Dean and exclaiming "Daddy, kisses!" to which Dean follows Sam's example, pushing his laptop aside and pulling Jack onto his lap, hugging him tightly and kissing his cheek, to which Jack laughs, touching Dean's stubble and saying "tickles." Dean looks at him a little guilty, but kisses him again, eliciting another laugh from Jack.
Soon Jack falls asleep in Dean's arms, while Sam watches as Dean carefully places Jack on his shoulder, then reaches for a blanket that's lying on a nearby chair and covers Jack with a practiced motion, holding the baby close.
"We can put him to bed," Sam suggest, to which Dean refuses.
"He's not bothering me," Dean says, but he doesn't go back to work, instead carefully running his fingers through Jack's light hair, and Sam knows he's doing it so as not to disturb the baby's nap.
"And I still insist that you spoil him," Sam tells him, pushing his laptop aside as well and instead admiring the scene in front of him.
Dean raises his eyebrows, giving Sam a challenging look.
"First of all, I wasn't the one who bought him three toy cars at once," Dean tells him seriously, and Sam feels a slight blush creeping up his face. "And second of all, you keep saying that, but Jack still gets all his behavior from you."
And when Sam looks at Dean blankly, Dean has already turned his gaze back to Jack, smiling at the cute way Jack pouts in his sleep.
"What do you mean?" Sam decides to clarify, and waits a few minutes before Dean gives him his answer.
"This," Dean tells him, nodding at the sleeping Jack in his arms. "When you were little, you used to fall asleep on me all the time. Sometimes you'd even come over with a blanket just to sleep in my arms," Dean tells him with a smile, and Sam starts to remember.
Christmas Eve, which they celebrated at Bobby's house. Dean spent his time in front of the old TV, waiting for Christmas movies, and when Sam came to him, holding a warm blanket in his hands and shyly lowering his eyes to the floor, Dean accepted him with a warm smile, letting Sam climb into his lap and curl up on his chest.
"And don't even get me started on 'kisses,'" Dean continues, and this time Sam tenses, raising an eyebrow questioningly. Yes, Dean often hugged little Sam, but Sam doesn't remember Dean kissing him at all. Dean looks at him with undisguised surprise. "Don't tell me you don't remember. You were always demanding kisses, even worse than Jack. You'd come up to me any time you had a free moment, look at me with those big puppy eyes, point your finger where you wanted me to kiss you and say, 'Dee, kiss me.'"
"And you did what I asked you to do?" Sam asks breathily, and now it's Dean's turn to blush slightly.
He shrugs carefully, so as not to wake Jack.
"I'm a weak man, Sammy, sue me. I tried to say no to you a couple of times, but you immediately started crying and... I could never stand the sight of you crying, so I kissed you every time you asked. When we got older and you went to school, you stopped asking me, but before that it was all the time." Dean finally looks up, and when he notices the scared look on Sam's face, Dean quickly grins, defusing the situation. "No need to be embarrassed, Sammy, that was sweet. Your charms always worked on me, I'm pretty sure if you asked me to kiss you right on the lips now, I'd do it without hesitation." And when Dean realizes what he just said, he quickly bites his tongue, his eyes widening.
Sam feels his own face begin to burn even more, and he quickly lowers his head, hiding it from Dean. There's an awkward silence between them, and Sam waits a few seconds before clearing his throat and nervously tucking his hair behind his ears.
"I'm going to go make dinner. Jack's probably going to be hungry when he wakes up."
He doesn't look at Dean as he gets up from the table and leaves the library, but Dean's words are still loud and clear in his head as he cooks Jack's favorite letter-shaped pasta.
During dinner, Jack looks at each letter on his plate with interest before putting it in his mouth. Dean makes up a few simple words for him, then recites them letter by letter, smiling when Jack repeats them. Sam can feel the uncomfortable tension between them, but he tries to ignore it, eating his own pasta.
Jack demands kisses before bed, and Dean and Sam take turns doing so, watching as a contented and smiling Jack closes his eyes and falls asleep.
Sam gets into bed a little nervously and twitchily, and he's almost certain that Dean won't touch him tonight, but when the lights go out in the room and Dean gets into bed after him, Sam breathes a sigh of relief when he feels Dean's usual arm around his waist, pulling him closer. Sam feels like he should say something, the words are on the tip of his tongue, but when Dean lifts himself up slightly on his elbow and leaves two smeared kisses on Sam's face (one on his cheek and one next to his lips, too close) Sam understands his request and decides to remain silent, squeezing Dean's hand in his. He falls asleep with a small smile on his lips.
Over time, Jack becomes more grown up and shows more interest, and now Dean and Sam can watch not only children's cartoons with him, but also adult films.
"I'm telling you again, Dean, Jack is too little to watch ‘Final Destination’," Sam repeats tiredly, sitting down in one of the soft armchairs in Dean's cave (they really should come up with another name for this room).
Jack climbs onto Dean's empty armchair, immediately looking with interest into the large bowl of popcorn that Dean places right in front of him.
"Not little, Daddy Sam," Jack argues childishly with him, while Dean grins contentedly, raising his eyebrows meaningfully in Sam's direction.
"That's right, Jack, tell him," Dean encourages the kid, and when Sam gives him his best "bitch look," Dean snorts under his breath again, but puts the movie aside, instead settling on ‘Nanny McPhee’, which he and Jack have watched a few times already, but they both know is one of the boy's favorites.
Dean settles into the armchair with Jack, letting him sit comfortably into his lap and lean back against his chest. Jack’s legs dangling freely and he stares intently at the large screen in front of him. Sam watches it for a few seconds, enjoying the view, before settling himself, tucking his long legs under himself and scooping up a handful of popcorn.
They settle into a comfortable silence, the three of them munching on popcorn and watching the events unfold on the screen, but about halfway through the movie, Sam feels his head begin to droop to the side, his eyelids slowly closing. At first, he tries to fight it, shaking his head and blinking hard, trying to keep the sleep from creeping up on him, but Dean's cave is warm and smells delicious of popcorn, the movie on the TV is nice and soothing, and the sight of Dean and Jack sitting next to him, looking like they really were father and son, gives Sam comfort, and soon he moves to the very edge of his armchair, laying his head on Dean's shoulder and closing his eyes.
He feels Dean flinch slightly at first, but then relaxes, turning his head to the side and pressing a kiss to the top of Sam's head.
"Tired?" Dean asks quietly, still not moving away any further. His nose is combing through Sam's hair, and Sam can't help the pleasant shivers that run through his body. He nods silently at Dean's question, moving even closer, nuzzling his own nose into Dean's neck, feeling his brother's arm wrap around his shoulders, pulling him closer. "You can go to sleep if you want. Jack and I will finish the movie and then we'll come over," Dean suggests, but Sam immediately frowns, shaking his head.
"I don't want to be without you," Sam admits, sounding just like Jack, but he doesn't pay it any mind. He feels Dean's smirk next to his face, and he tries to suppress a smile when he feels Dean begin to leave light kisses on his face. One lip print on his forehead, two on his closed eyelids, one on the tip of his nose and one on his cheek, but when it's Sam's lips that are next, Dean stops, hovering near Sam's face but not taking the next step.
For a moment, they share the same air, neither speaking. Sam can hear Jack laughing at what's happening on the screen, but more clearly he can hear his own heartbeat, which only gets louder when Sam slowly opens his eyes, meeting Dean's intense gaze, who looks tense and scared, but Sam thinks that the fact that his brother hasn't pulled away from him yet is a good sign.
"Sammy..." Dean begins quietly, choosing his words. "I don't think this is a good idea."
Sam has time to panic. He runs his eyes over Dean's face, trying to find something to latch onto, but he quickly realizes that Dean is still not pulling away, and he realizes that they've both already lost this fight.
"You said my charms always worked on you," Sam says carefully, watching Dean's face, and when he doesn't see the frown or the disapproving curve of his mouth, Sam smiles, breathing out a quiet "kiss me," and Dean doesn't need to be told twice.
The kiss he leaves on Sam's lips is careful and soft, tastes like popcorn and soda, and Sam can't help but smile stupidly as he kisses back, pulling Dean closer by the collar of his sweatshirt, obediently parting his lips when Dean's tongue runs over his bottom lip. Sam tries to suppress a small moan when Dean's tongue touches his own, and he feels Dean shudder, and Sam only relaxes further, reassured that he's not the only one feeling the warmth and the absolute sense that everything is finally in place.
They're interrupted by Jack's voice. The kid watches them closely, then looks at the TV and asks in surprise, "Daddy's wedding?" immediately pointing his finger at the screen where the main characters are kissing at the altar, and Sam and Dean simultaneously snort under their breath, looking at a still confused Jack.
Sam rests his head on Dean's shoulder again, closing his eyes as he feels Dean kiss his temple, then turning to Jack. "You can say that, buddy," Dean tells him, and Jack seems more than happy with that answer, because he giggles joyfully, then squirms in Dean's lap, leaving one smudged kiss on each of Sam's and Dean's cheeks.
That night, they let Jack sleep in the same bed with them, and as the baby snores sweetly on Dean's pillow, while tightly clutching Sam's shirt in his hands, neither Dean nor Sam can stop smiling. And as Sam begins to fall asleep after Jack, he feels a light kiss on his lips, reaching forward in response, finding Dean's hand and squeezing it in his own.
Perhaps Dean was right, and Jack deserved better parents than them, but Sam knows for sure that he wouldn't trade what he has now for anything else.
just thought of how young sam & dean navigated hunting without john.
dean thinks sam's too young to go on a hunt and worries about his safety, so he'd convince sam to stay in the motel. but little sammy doesn't get why? why does dean have to leave him? both dean and his dad has started training him. he probably already knows more about handling guns than most adults!
so, sam whines, "but what am i supposed to do while you're gone?"
dean shrugs, a little annoyed, "well, i don't know, kiddo! what do you usually do while i'm gone?"
sam mumbles, "wait for you to come back."
that shuts dean up. his cheeks flush as he realizes how much his little brother's life revolves around him. the weight of responsibility settles on his shoulders, pushing him to finish the hunt as quickly as possible. dean needs to get back to his little brother.
young!sam coping with wanting his dad to pay attention to them but it's just dean and him stuck in a random town where the kids talk about some local legend
Ten-year-old Sam hunched over the dusty library table, nose practically buried in a thick book titled "Mythical Creatures of the Midwest." He scribbled furiously in a worn notebook, his brow furrowed in concentration.
"Still don't think this whole 'Demon Goat' thing is a bunch of hooey?" Dean's voice, laced with bored amusement, drifted in from behind him.
Sam slammed the book shut, the sudden noise making Dean jump. "No, Dean! It says here it leaves footprints with a cleft hoof and a bird's claw!"
Dean, who was sprawled lazily on a nearby chair, flipped a page of a tattered comic book with a dismissive snort. "Big whoop. Probably just some oversized possum scaring the locals."
Sam scowled. "Dad takes all these things seriously, Dean. Why can't you?"
"Look, Sammy," Dean said, sitting up a little straighter, "Dad's got the experience. He knows things and he's seen them before, but I bet he'd think we're a bunch of idiots for this. There's no point in getting our hopes up on finding some winged demon goat. I don't even think they're real."
Sam's shoulders slumped. He understood Dean's logic, but something about the legend of the Demon Goat, the mystery of it all, sparked a thrill in him. He longed to be a part of his dad's world, not forgotten in some random town and some random backwoods motel.
"Maybe not," Sam mumbled, more to himself than Dean. "But wouldn't it be cool if there was something out there? This would be my first hunt. Maybe Dad would come back and help us—help me."
Dean's playful facade faltered for a moment. He looked at Sam, a flicker of worry crossing his features.
"Yeah, it would," he finally admitted, his voice softer than usual. "But right now, our job is to stick with what Dad's instructed us. We stay here and wait for him to come get us. We're a team, remember?"
Sam met Dean's gaze, a spark of determination replacing the disappointment in his eyes. "Yeah, a team," he echoed, a small smile playing on his lips. He didn't know if they'd ever encounter the Demon Goat, but one thing was clear—they'd face whatever came their way, together.
"Alright then, Van Helsing," Dean said, a mischievous glint in his eyes, "let's see if this book of yours mentions any weaknesses for giant demon goats."
Sam couldn't help but grin. With renewed enthusiasm, Sam flipped open the book once more, ready to delve into the lore of the Demon Goat, with his brother by his side.
happy wincest Wednesday!! can you share some fluffy headcanons, please? i've had a crappy day and would like sweet fluff to feel better. thank you! ❤
sure friend 🥰 I hope you feel better 🥺 it's been a rough couple days for me as well
I really love the idea of Dean giving the best massages. Especially as the boys get older he'd be really good at getting out the cracks in Sam's back, but even in the early seasons and preseries, dean would be amazing at making his sammy feel better, rubbing his shoulders and feet and temples. Sam would fall asleep in Dean's lap because of the soft pressure of Dean's fingers making soft circles in Sam's skin right below his hairline, and dean would think it was so cute. he would run his fingers through sam's soft silky hair because he'd never be caught doing this while sam was awake but he secretly loves the smoothness in his hands.
i'm also a sucker for forehead kisses, so i think dean would give sam lots of them as kids, and it's one of the many babybrotherisms that has stuck around throughout their lives. eventually it becomes kisses on sam's eyelids as he sleeps, on sammy's cute little nose, the corner of his lips--not quite on the lips, but almost there. it wants to be a real kiss, but dean doesn't know that yet. it's eventually sam that grabs him and holds him there until their mouths open and they sigh together, what's been coming since forever.
Sam just needs to be held sometimes, pulled tight into his brother’s chest. Dean’s smell always meant comfort, the faint motor oil and smoke, even the lingering perfume of a one-night stand.
He always held him just right, too, with one arm around his waist and the other cradling the back of his head. Sam’s ear would be right over Dean’s heart and he could hear the rhythmic thump-thump-thump that was always in sync with his own.
sam making dean breakfast in bed, a nice plate of waffles covered in syrup and whipped cream. he wakes dean up and is met with a gun to the face, because dean does that “you just woke me up so now i’m gonna shoot you with the gun i keep under my pillow” thing, but after dean realizes who his gun’s pointed at he softens, smiles and gives a quiet, “hiya, sammy”
dean making a joke about them “getting sticky” when he notices the waffles. and when sam sits down with him, he smears a bit on his face and wiggles his eyebrows.
of course, sam cleans it up. him licking it off dean’s face and dean turning his head so now they’re kissing, and as they start getting into it is that the plate is tipping and the syrup’s spilling over dean’s chest
sam cleans it up, and— oops, looks like they do get pretty sticky after that
