It had been a couple days since the doctors told them they think they could restore Roman’s memories back to their original state before the accident. There was a set of pills that had just entered the realm of legal and federally approved use. It had shown signs of real promise during its experimental stages and while it was not a full proof 100% guaranteed cure for Roman’s amnesia, it was what they hoped for.
The doctors had warned them that there may be some side effects for Roman such as very vivid nightmares or confusion. And Roman had acquiesced even knowing the risks.
“I want to remember you guys, while the accident has changed me forever, I feel like I’d be missing out on something if I just started over.” Roman had said, looking at who he now considered his friends, even if he didn’t remember them after this, he had already formed a bond, whether or not that desire for the bond stemmed from somewhere deep in Roman’s mind that still remembered his friends, he wanted to have those memories back.
Patton knew Roman couldn’t read their expressions, much less what they could be because of. They hadn’t told him about the reason he had driven off and got into a car accident, no mention of a dinner and an argument that led to the unfortunate event that befell Roman ever crossed their lips.
That was what occupied his thoughts as he, Virgil, and Logan walked back to Roman’s room after refreshing themselves anew by going home and taking care of themselves. The doctors had assured them Roman was fine. They were monitoring him and his vital signs for any negative reaction to the drug. Roman was fine.
Or at least, he was supposed to be.
Virgil had just snarked back at Logan playfully at Logan’s comment of ‘You know build-a-bears are not alive right?’, when Patton heard someone distantly shout.
He couldn’t really make out the words, and wasn’t really paying attention, but his heart dropped to his toes as he heard Roman’s voice.
“Fuck off!
In a moment, Patton was running towards Roman’s room, Virgil and Logan no doubt right on his heels.
But when he turned the corner, he almost sobbed on the spot.
Roman was weakly wrestling with a number of doctors and nurses in the middle of the hospital hallway, various leads still attached to him with their machine counterparts closely nearby, beeping from being disconnected.
Roman was sobbing at this point, and Patton’s heart broke as Roman pleaded for his life, begging the doctors and nurses not to kill him.
“Let me go! Please don’t kill me! I-”
“I don’t know who I am! Don’t kill me please! I don't know who I am! PLEASE!”
Patton didn’t even remember running up to where Roman was fighting, all he remembered was watching Roman’s body convulse in sudden pain just as a nearby nurse was finally able to get a tranquilizer and inject it.
Almost immediately, Roman stopped fighting them, eyes open but not really seeing what was in front of them.
But as he did, a deep red spot suddenly bloomed on his gown around the belly area. The nurses and doctors around him became urgent again, knowing that Roman was bleeding likely not just externally, but internally as well.
“Fuck, he’s loosing blood!”
“I know!”
“We need to get him to surgery!”
Patton came up to Roman and without thinking, tried to grab him, his voice cracking as he yelled out a desperate:
“ROMAN!”
Though Roman seemed to be on the verge of unconsciousness, Roman’s face sluggishly changed to one of vague realization. As Patton was held back by a nurse, Patton saw Roman feebly attempt to raise his head, eyes just barely open and utter a very small sounding:
“Pattah?”
And then Roman’s eyes slipped shut, Patton sobbing as part of him feared that this would be the last time Patton ever saw life in those eyes. And Patton was still trying to reach him, even as his friends took up the mantle of holding him back, shouting, at least Patton thought it was shouting, he could really hear anything over the beat of his own heart really. Even as they got Roman on a bed and whisked them far off to surgery, Patton fought with Virgil and Logan as they held him back.
His mind screamed at them, asking them why they would hold him back.
He needs me! It’s my fault this happened! If I had done something this never would’ve happened! It should be me dying on my way to surgery, not Roman! Roman who doesn’t even remember who he is! Roman, who’s been my friend for years and despite his amnesia still wants to be our friends!
But on the outside, he vaguely realized he was crying and the statements he was shouting in his mind were grief-filled wails to everyone else.
Long after Roman had disappeared from sight, Patton’s increasingly feeble attempts to run after Roman stopped and Patton was held by two of his best friends. His cries and tears felt like they could fill oceans as his sorrow and grief felt endless, like from sea to shining sea.
Patton’s heart cried out to whoever would listen to just take Patton instead, to save Roman from the pain and suffering.
But no such thing could happen, and the cries of Patton’s heart fell on deaf ears and Patton remained where he was with his two other friends and not in Roman’s place.
Patton was sure… Roman was going to die now because of him!
