they dont call me mx mental illness for nothing (no one calls me that)

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they dont call me mx mental illness for nothing (no one calls me that)
Still on the Sanders Sides train soo Roman HC anyone?
I think when creativity split it was more like Roman got ripped from Remus more than anything, from what we know Creativity got split because of what Thomas believed to be good and bad and as such Roman is the one most stuck on this black and white thinking because that's what he is. He is the result of that.
As for how creativity split I like to belive that King Creativity was locked in a room by the Mind Palace or the Unconscious (i kind of view it as this eldritch horror thing that carrys out Thomas' unconscious wishes, also having it as the Mind Palace means more angst of Roman feeling jusy completely unsafe). This is also why Roman is so on edge in the SvS episode - because he remembers the split and being formed. He also knows that between the two of him Remus is supposed to be creativity, not him (which makes sense as Romulus and Remus are the twins in actual Roman mythology). So anytime he seems to do something 'bad' or 'wrong' there's a chance whoever split them (Be it the Mind Palace or the Unconscious) might come back and 'fix him' until he's Thomas' ideal version of 'Good' Creativity. I also kinda like the idea that this has happened shortly after the split, like Roman controlled impulsive thoughts or something but that was deemed wrong and so was taken from him and given to Remus.
Anyways, this all leads up to Roman being locked up by the entity (once again The Unconscious or the Mind Palace) and whilst Thomas' creativity is still functioning they can't summon him so they do a whole adventure to his room which oops they can't enter cause its under 'maintenance' they can hear Roman though and the poor boy is sobbing amd apologising for not being good.
Insert whole Philosophy debate about defining things as good and bad and accepting Remus as Creativity, and not being inherently bad but also still having a boundary separating creating art that is disturbing to you and art that isn't (because tbh Roman and Remus have been separated for so long is would impossible for Thomas to consider them as one thing anymore so they will never merge).
The door then unlocks, and everyone rushes in and finds Roman, still sobbing and curled up and Remus tackles him into a hug and they have a long crying session and he appologises to Janus for making fun of his name and placing so much pressure on Pattons and for ignoring Logan and initially not wanting Virgil to be with them and labeling Remus as inherently Evil (the damage by the entity is done so hes free from the black and white thinking but now stuck beliving he has always been in the wrong, so like borderline hysterical at this point).
The others are obviously all thrown off and so the whole story is spilled, Roman telling most of it as Remus wasn't entirely aware of the whole situation (they both remembered the Kings memories but Remus physically remembers physically being the King and making choices but didnt realise Roman didnt). Lots more tears and appologies and the other sides being servery disturbed and incredibly concerned by the whole situation. But they all make up and Thomas is sent off to bed whilst the rest of them have a movie night.
Yeah I figure this has slowly delved from a HC to a whole story but eh nothing i can do. Feel free to take bits of this or actually flesh this out into an actual story I just like Roman angst and have so many thoughts about the split.
Something terrible is gonna happen when Remus gets accepted
Roman is actually going to go evil
Don’t ask me what that means
I don’t know.
But Remus getting accepted is just the beginning of the end for Roman and I WILL be crying
prompt submission:
Remus looked around the room, seemingly unimpressed by all the grandeur. "What a waste. I can see why Thomas was so... disappointed in you."
The words were meant to hurt. If they were from anyone else, they would have. But the sweet irony only made Roman smile. "Disappointed in me? He gave you away."
Roman has never seen Remus' expression crumple before.
It's salt in the wound, for both of them. One was born to be cherished, and the other was born to be discarded.
The encounter happens right after Roman's latest brainstorming session with Logan goes sour. Thomas rejects almost every one of his proposals and leaves Roman feeling inept and desperate for approval.
Remus loiters in Roman's room hoping for some entertainment. After all, Roman reeks of disappointment and anger and he's always fun to annoy in this state.
He kicks at all of Roman's discarded ideas. They litter the floor now, most of them overflowing from the trash bin that Remus likes to pick through when Roman's away. He starts teasing him over his "pissy" mood, telling Roman he's definitely living up to his namesake, and it escalates from there.
Roman normally wouldn't rise to the bait, at least not with so much vitriol, but he's feeling particularly sore after Thomas and Logan's recent rejection of his contributions. He lashes out because he's afraid of being replaced, so he has to deny Remus' importance in order to uphold his own.
He regrets it the moment he says it, but Remus' jovial expression is already closing off to him and shuddering into something much darker and hurt. He scurries off before Roman can even get a word of apology out, and he spends the rest of the evening trying and failing to find him.
He goes into Remus' room as a last resort, but Remus is still in hiding, and when Remus hides, he will almost never be found unless he wants to be. He still has access to the random pockets of "nothingness" that lead to the Subconscious. It used to be his domain, after all. He knows it better than anyone else.
Roman resigns himself to checking all of the ceiling vents and closets for the rest of the afternoon, but right as he starts to leave Remus' room, he trips over one of his projects.
It looks.....familiar.
Because it is. He picks it up, resisting the urge to don gloves as he does so, inspects the object/idea from all angles and freezes.
This is Roman's idea, rewritten and remixed. It was one of the few unrefined project ideas he had scrapped before it could even be presented to Logan or Thomas.
He thought it had potential but he just couldn't get it to work for the life of him, there was always something missing.
And here it is, no longer a crumpled up ball of paper in Roman's trash can. It's been carefully unwrapped and tended to, not given up on the way Remus was, and tucked away in a random messy corner in Remus' disaster of a room, already halfway to refinement.
It's good, loathe as Roman is to admit it, it's not a solution he would have thought of in a million years but already he's buzzing with a hundred different ways to "yes-and" it and frantically pulling his own notebook and pen out to scribe as many of the ideas down as he can.
Remus returns to the safety of his own room after spending hours sulking in the sewers of the imagination, only to discover Roman on the dingy floor of REMUS' room of all places, motioning him over hurriedly to look over the new schematics of an idea that is now just as much Remus' as it is Roman's.
When the next brainstorming session comes around, they present it together.
i haven’t seen anyone talk about how devastating this line is…
roman is once again being called inherently selfish, as a part of function of romance. and yet again, it’s perceived as a bad thing, another flaw in his character. just like with hopes, dreams, and the ego, it’s something to be limited, as selfishness “should” be. despite roman believing he’s fighting for something noble and good, what’s more pure than love, he’s still being selfish, he’s still wrong. another knock against him and one that he never disputes or defends himself from. and it comes from c!thomas no less…
look at his face here :( someone give my boy some love. there’s nothing wrong with pursing what you want
it took me a while to get to writing this post bc it was hard to gather my thoughts abt it, but something i've been rotating in my mind ever since the video came out is not only the fact roman didn't try that hard to defend himself when logan suggested something that went against his very core and propose; but even after everything was settled, when he tried for a moment to (very politely and calmly may i add!!) stand up for himself, he immediately backed down.
im talking about THIS moment:
after everyone (including even janus) thank logan and address his attempt at contribution, he looks at roman. roman, who so far has been uncharacteristically quiet. and what does he say?
"look, we can't all be good at romance, logan..."
"...but i would never advise thomas to give up on being logical, just because i don't understand it."
and look at logan's face in reaction to that. that line clearly strikes something in him, as it should. logan realizes here, i think, that by suggesting they remove from thomas's life something that is at the core of roman's being, he has unintentionally crosses a line that shouldn't be crossed. this is roman defending himself (again - look how CALM he is abt it! how rational. he is being the most mature and level headed abt this that he can, even tho he is undoubtfully hurt and shaken), and logan SEEING HIS WAY. this is logan accepting his point.
but then, immediately after:
roman backs down. he steps back. he downplays it, tries to say something nice to logan to prove he can see reason or be a team player and not make a scene; he lowers his voice back down.
and you can see in virgil's reaction that he notices. and furthermore, he doesn't approve.
also interesting to point that roman's eyes flick over to thomas in the middle of this. and it is a quick movement; i had to slow him to 0.25 speed to even take this screenshot. and he does it again right after the shot of virgil too:
and after that we can also see that not only did virgil noticed, but thomas and janus did too.
patton, interestingly enough, is the only one not showing signs of noticing something is amiss; he whispers to roman that he could have "given [logan] a little more".
so, what is my point?
i think roman is containing himself on purpose, out of fear of being too much. i think he's afraid of demanding things for himself, even when it's important, and i think he's scared shitless of thomas not approving.
all of this things we as viewers already knew of course. but i think the others are starting to notice as well. god i hope this is all gonna blows up.
Solitary
Read on Ao3
Warnings: solitary confinement
Pairings: none
Word Count: 3550
Roman never really fit in with the rest of the family. Or, 'family,' he supposes, because it isn't really, not for him. Sure, he's one of the main henchman's kid brother who wasn't to be trusted enough not to blab if he didn't work for the family, so they just gave him a basic job to keep him off the streets and out of trouble, but not enough to know anything worth knowing.