#xiaonyu

[danurso]

Goat magnet

Aether: Xiao?

Xiao: *appears* You called?

Aether: Yep, can you do me a favor?

Xiao: As long as it is within the realm of possibility.

Aether: good. *Places primogems on his hand*

Xiao: What are these for?

Aether: Can you toss them as far as you can?

Xiao: *confused*

Amber: Just humor him please.

Xiao: *sigh* fine. *Turns to the horizon, tossing the primogems as far as he can*

Aether: *whistle* Nice throw.

Xiao: I fail to see the point in this-

*A golden meteor lights the sky*

Amber: Here it comes! *Stands back*

Aether: *stands back as well*

Xiao: What is? *turns around, only to see a golden meteor crashing on top of him*

???: Oww. . .

Xiao: Ugh...what was- !?!?

Ganyu: *on top of him* That hurt a little. . .where- *red* X-xiao!?

Xiao: *red, confused as all hell*

Ganyu/Xiao: *silent awkwardness*

Aether: . . . .I can't believe that actually worked. 

Amber: Told you~

Aether: Fine, you win. *Hands her a bag of mora*

Amber: *hugging the bag* Hehehe, I love being right.

(Game has been kind to me recently, ty mihoyo)

[madokas-notebook]

xiao and ganyu wallpapers bc i also adore them

once again credit for chibis goes to @/genshinmedia !

[danurso-impact]

Literal voices AU

Xiao: *grunts, holding his head*

Aether: xiao? Are you okay?

Xiao: yes, i'm fine. Leave me be.

Aether: what's wrong?

Xiao: it's nothing! I just. . .hear voices from my fallen comrades from time to time, don't waste your time thinking about it. *keeps walking*

Aether: oh. . .

Paimon: poor xiao, paimon can't imagine how hard it must be for him to listen to the voices of his lost friends like that.

Aether: it must be really painful.

*with xiao*

Xiao: ugh. . .

Hydro yaksha: you ate tiger fish for that adepti and honor his death but you don't want to eat squid to honor mine!? What kind of friend are you!?!?

Electro yaksha: tiger fish comes with way too much fat! *flexing his four arms* you need to exercise if you wanna burn all that!

Geo yaksha: he doesn't care about us anymore.

Pyro yaksha: aww! Come back! I wanna see that fairy again! She's so cuuute!

Xiao: *groaning* shut up.

*later*

Xiao: *killing possessed hilichurls*

EY: come on! Put more strength into these swings!

PY: Let him work.

GY: His form is getting sloppy though, he needs more practice.

Xiao: I don't wanna hear criticism from two guys who died in battle before me.

HY: OOOHHHHH DAYUMMM!!!!!

PY: That's a Critical hit if i've ever seen one.

EY/GY: *crying* shut up! We did our best okay!?

Xiao: *stabs a mitachurl* then do your best again, but this time do it to stay quiet!

EY/GY: i hate you xiao.

Xiao: shut up already!

*the next day*

Xiao: *walking around liyue* the preparations seem to be going well.

Ganyu: you think? I'm glad you like it, we've been working really hard to make everything perfect during the festival.

Xiao: i see. . . *looks away for a bit*

PY: come on, invite her already!

EY: man up dude!

HY: you already got the lanterns for you two ready! Just invite the girl!

GY: watch him chicken out yet again.

Xiao: shut up.

Ganyu: ah. . .i-i'm sorry, *looks away* I didn't realize my voice was bothering you.

Xiao: what? N-no, it's not, your voice isn't the one bothering me.

Ganyu: oh, so it's the voices in your head again?

Xiao: *nods*

Ganyu: I'm sorry, I can't imagine how painful it must be.

Xiao: *deadpans* you have no idea.

Ganyu: i wished i could help you somehow.

PY: Wait! Wait! Tell her "you're already helping by being here"

Xiao: *red*

GY: that's the cheesiest thing he could say.

EY: If he says that, I'm gonna barf.

Xiao: well. . .you're already helping, just by being here. . .with me.

Ganyu: *blushes with a small smile*

PY: SCOOORE!!!

HY: smooth.

EY: *puking sounds*

Ganyu: i-i'm glad to hear that. . .

GY: I don't, somebody please kill me again.

Ganyu: and. . .i've been thinking. I know you work a lot at night but. . . *fidgeting* would it be possible for us to release our lanterns together? Maybe?

HY: And it pays off!

Xiao: i. . .would like that.

Ganyu: really? I'm so glad. I was sure you would flat out refuse.

Xiao: i don't think i would refuse an invitation from you like that.

Ganyu: why?

Xiao: because I like yo. . . .

Ganyu: *staring at him*

Xiao: *red* . . .your horns! I really like your horns.

Ganyu: *with a massive blush* o-oh, ehm, t-thank you, i. . . .i-i just remembered something ningguang asked me to do, i'll see you later xiao. *leaves hurried*

Xiao: i. . . *groans*

HY: PFFF!!! GHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! OH MY REX LAPIS!!! I CAN'T!!! I JUST CAN'T!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! MY BELLY HURTS!!! AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE ONE!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

GY: "i like your horns"? Hehehe, smoothest line on the book.

PY: *chuckling* i-i'm sorry xiao, but I can't hold it back, i'm really sorry. *chuckles more*

EY: I'm sorry man, I would pat you in the back if I could, but I'm. . .you know, dead?

HY: I'M PRETTY SURE HE WISHED HE WAS TOO!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Xiao: *red* YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST!!!

[filliasmind]

another what if

xiao forces himself to try a pickup line on ganyu but she just dozes off and ends up missing it, and by the time she can ask xiao what he was saying, the yaksha teleports away, ears red and mad

[danurso]

Ganyu: Soo. . . .Are you free right now?

Xiao: I took care of everything overnight, and demons rarely nact during the day, so yes, I think I'm free.

Ganyu: Well, I caught up with the paperwork and even filled some in advance so. . . .i have some free time too.

Xiao: and?

Ganyu: *pink* and I was wondering if you wanted to. . . .have a quick one with me.

Xiao: *blushes* well. . . . .it has been some time, hasn't it?

Ganyu: *nods, red in the face*

Xiao: I guess, it wouldn't hurt. We can do it at the wangshu inn, no one will bother us there.

Ganyu: Okay. . . . *holds his hand* Let's go then.

Xiao: *looking away* sure.

*Later*

Zhongli: Xiao? I brought your painkillers. *Walks into the room* i hope-

Xiao: *Soundly asleep on the couch*

Ganyu: *also asleep while being spooned*

Zhongli: . . . . .i guess you two really do work a lot. *Picks up a blanket and covers them* A good rest for you two. 

Huai'an: Excuse me?

Zhongli: shhh. *Nods to the couple*

Huai'an: *whispering* I'm sorry to interrupt, but a few demons have been seen in a village village, and mister xiao told me to always warn him when such a thing happened.

Zhongli: . . . . *Looks back to them*

Xiao: *mumbles, hugging her closer*

Ganyu: *smiles*

Zhongli: *sigh* I suppose some exercise is good for one's health.

Huai'an: what do you mean sir?

Zhongli: Do not disturb them anymore. *Summons spear* I'll take care of those issues for today.

*Meanwhile*

Possessed hilichurls: dala mimi unu sada? 'Why do i hear boss music?'

[danurso-impact]

Couple dynamics 1

Childe x Lumine

Lumine: idiot! *slap*

Childe: oww! *rubbing the spot* that really hurt ojou-chan. . .do it again.

Lumine: what?

Childe: come on! If you don't wanna slap me, then punch me or kick me, just do it as hard as you can!

Lumine: . . .no. *walks away*

Childe: *following* Come on ojou-chan! It's been a week since our last fight! 

Lumine: no!

Childe: If you give me a punch I'll give you a big kiss!

Lumine: *red* I-I SAID NO!!!

Xiao x Ganyu

Xiao: *with mask on* Someone is going to die!

Ganyu: of fun!

Bennett x Fischl

Fischl: as much as simple minded mortals do not understand for more than a millenia now, my duty as the prinzessin of sin has been to perpetuate-

Bennett: *silently listening with a smile*

Fischl: bla bla bla bla bla bla bla bla. . .

Bennett: I have no idea what she's talking about, but she looks so cute when she's excited.

Razor x Barbara

Razor: *finishes off the last of an horde of hilichurls*

Barbara: Barbatos above, what did you do!?

Razor: *full of bruises and bleeding a bit* Razor defeat hilichurls that hurt barbara.

Barbara: *healing him* There were way too many of them! You shouldn't have done that!

Razor: barbara is razor's lupical, hilichurl hurt barbara, razor not forgive them. Barbara is very important to razor.

Barbara: *red* . . .geez, that's still reckless. But. . .thank you for protecting me. *kisses his cheek*

Razor: . . . .can razor get another one?

Barbara: *redder* m-maybe later.

Chongyun x Hu Tao

Chongyun: i hate you!

Hu tao: *grins* i bet you hate yourself even more, useless exorcist.

Chongyun: shut up! Exorcism is a very respectable and efficient way to deal with spirits!

Hu tao: i was just talking about you being useless, but i guess exorcism in general is pretty useless too.

Chongyun: FUCK YOU!!

Hu tao: Do it yourself you coward!

Chongyun: RIGHT NOW!! *picks her up and stomps to a room*

Hu tao: *victorious grin* works every time.

[danurso-impact]

Xiao: *sitting on top of a building in liyue*

Ganyu: there you are. I was hoping I could find you around the city today.

Xiao: there weren't many demonic presences around to take my time, so i wanted to use my free time to watch the lanterns. It's not like I get many opportunities like this.

Ganyu: i see.

Xiao: do you need something?

Ganyu: Well, I just came to thank you for the qixing flowers.

Xiao: i don't know what-

Ganyu: one of my work partners told me you came through the window just to place a bouquet of them on my table, it was very nice of you.

Xiao: hmph. . .stupid humans with their large mouths

Ganyu: they were quite delicious.

Xiao: *looks back to her* you ate them?

Ganyu: yes! Was I not supposed to?

Xiao: i. . .

Ganyu: *tilts head to the side*

Xiao: *sighs* forget it. Is that why you came here? You didn't have to come all the way here just to thank me.

Ganyu: Well yes, I did want to thank you, but there's something else as well. *quickly goes back inside*

Xiao: ?

Ganyu: I know I'm a day late, I wanted to give you this earlier but I was extremely busy.

Xiao: *mumbles* as always.

Ganyu: *walks out with a jade spear on hand* happy valentines day.

Xiao: *eyes wide* is this my. . .

Ganyu: They found it a while back during an archaeological research. I heard you talking about being difficult to share a weapon with mister zhongli, so i thought you would appreciate it more than the flowers i had in mind originally.

Xiao: i. . .i don't know what to say.

Ganyu: Then don't say anything, instead you could just. . .*pink* share a nice plate of almond tofu with me? I heard you really like those.

Xiao: I. . .wouldn't be opposed to the idea.

Ganyu: *sparkling eyes* Really? I'll go in and ask some for us then. *walks in excited*

Xiao: *red* This woman is going to be my demise, I'm sure of it.

*bônus*

Xiao: DISAPPEAR!!! *summons his mask, delivering several plunge attacks mixed with dashes, killing an horde of hilichurls with ease*

Aether: *eyes wide* wow, he's even stronger than before! How's that possible!?

Zhongli: indeed, not to mention his mood seems to be in a better state as well.

Xiao: That seems to be it.

Aether: It is, thanks xiao.

Xiao: That is my duty, there's no need for gratitude. Hmm? *notices a few blood stains on the spear and sighs, pulling out a piece of cloth and cleaning it*

Aether: since when does xiao cleans his spear? Also, what is this spear?

Xiangling: it looks so cool! where did you get it?

Xiao: it was a present from ganyu. A group of archeologists found it a few weeks ago and she managed to retrieve it for me.

Zhongli: I see. . .never thought I would see you using this spear again.

Xiao: me neither.

Aether: oh, now it makes sense.

Xiao: what does?

Aether: *with a small grin* Well, it's not only your old spear, but it's also a spear that Ganyu surely had a lot of work to retrieve, even with her influence. So it makes sense you would treat it so kindly.

Xiao: *looks away* This spear is nothing but a tool used for killing. nothing more, nothing less. If you think I treat this spear any differently just because it was a gift from her, you're delusional.

Xiangling: *drooling and creeping closer* Then. . .can I borrow it to hunt some strong ingredients?

Xiao: *mask on* TOUCH IT AND I SWEAR YOU WILL NEVER COOK AGAIN FOOLISH MORTAL!!!

Xiangling: KYAAAA!!!! *hides behind zhongli, terrified*

Xiao: *mask fades*

Aether: *Grinning* . . .

Xiao: *looks away, cheeks pink* that does not prove anything.

Aether: Yes it does. I rest my case.

Xiangling: *still shaking and terrified*

Zhongli: *patting her head* there, there.

[sayovc]

i feel like ganyu and xiao are the couple that have History™