it is Finally Goddamn Friday which means it is finally time for “Things I Am Screaming About In Episode 5 of Shadow and Bone”
this post was going to be “Things I Am Screaming About In Episodes 5 and 6 Shadow and Bone” but then I screamed about too many things and this post would have been too long so I’m making two posts
side note: it’s only been a week?? this show only dropped a week ago??? god it feels like ages. I have been clawing my face off waiting for Friday so I could watch more. ANYWAY IT’S TIME NOW, I’VE EARNED IT.
how is EVERY single person on this show uTTERLY ADORABLE like JESUS. Genya and Alina’s EVERYTHING. D a v i d. Alina’s little “you like david, don’t you squidward” face :3 TWO HATS. alina and everyone else is SO! GODDAMN! CUTE!
FEDYOR! ALSO EXTREMELY CUTE! DOING HIS IVAN IMPRESSION! ALSO ARE THEY BOYFRIENDS????????????? There has absolutely never before been a point in my life where I said to myself “you know what? Fedyor and Ivan should be boyfriends” but now that this has been presented to me, Fedyor and Ivan Should Be Boyfriends. holy shit. the pairing I never knew I needed but how did I live without.
I
do not have
the vocabulary
for the next thing I want to scream about
I AM!!!! TOO SOFT!!!!!!!!! I AM TOO SOFT AND TOO TRAPPED IN DARKLINA HELL TO HANDLE WHAT THEY’RE GIVING ME JESUS CHRIST I HAD TO LIKE. PAUSE. AND TAKE A BREAK. AN EMOTIONAL BREATHER. I’m done, it’s fine, we can all go home, good episode, good season, good trilogy, it ends here right and nothing else happens ever
the fucking…….. I don’t think I have ever iNAHLED SO LOUD in my LIFE as I did at her put. putting on. helping him put. I’m sorry. helping him put on his kefta. literally what kind of rEGENCY BULLSHIT are these two ON oh I am so
low-key going into this, I was like “you know. I hope they let him smile At Least Once in this show. it’s a big ask, I’m not sure it’ll happen, but I hope.” good god I am fucking YELLING. just, like, hold on bro I need a minute. I NEED A MINUTE.
OH I REWOUND IT TO WATCH AGAIN AND HE HAS A FUCKING HORSE STATUE IN HIS BEDROOM. THERE’S A HILL THAT I’M DYING ON AND IT’S THAT THE DARKLING IS A WEIRD HORSE GIRL AND I AM VALIDATED TONIIIIIGHT. fuckin nerd.
I’M NOT AGAINST THE OCCASIONAL LIGHT ROLEPLAY !!!!!!! every man I have ever loved is a chaotic bisexual and an absolute bastard
Inej’s face during the Sankta Alina scene was So Much
AH. WELL. POOR MARIE. I GUESS IT… UH, COULD HAVE ENDED WORSE, ALL THINGS CONSIDERED. BUT POOR MARIE, ALL THE SAME. COUNT ME SURPRISED AT THAT. also genya kicking ass HELL YEAH
oh the ANGST OF THAT LAST KISS, BECAUSE Y O U K N O W W H A T ‘ S C O M I N G. like REAL GOOD KISS, because I was like “oh noooo and that’s the end of th—oH ONE MORE! OH ONE MORE. oh goddddd one more :((((“ fUCK!!! OH I’M SOFT!!!! AN END THAT NEITHER OF THEM KNOW YET IS AN END fuck I’m gonna d i e, I told y’all I was too soft for this
god zoe wanamaker is SO terrific. in the book that scene felt like an... exposition dump? but OOF she’s bREAKING my hEART and really bringing out the emotion of it. not just alina’s, but baghra’s as well, instead of it just being like i’M HERE TO MOVE THE PLOT ALONG and then fuck off into the night. (tho admittedly I feel like baghra’s life motto is actually “move the plot along and then fuck off into the night”)
y’know, you’d think ben barnes would have learned his lesson by now about leaving paintings lying around that prove you’re immortal, eternally youthful, and also evil. now he’s got two nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice.
OHHHHH INEJ KILLED A MAN FOR HIMMMMMMMM
jdfhgskjdfhgsjkdfhgk JESPER JUST WATCHING ALINA FUCKIN CLIMB IN THE KSDFHGKSDJHFG fantastic
OKAY THAT EPISODE WAS AMAZING. like I enjoyed the first four a lot because I was already invested from the jump and In Too Deep but I felt like the pacing of the earlier eps was a little wonky, whereas this episode I’m like. They Found It. Their Rhythm. They Found It. God that was A REALLY FUCKING GOOD EPISODE. I’m gonna go run around the bLOCK it is 10 PM and I am in a batHROBE BUT LIKE WHO WANTS TO SPRINT INTO THE NIGHT BECAUSE I SURE DO!!!!!!!
The episode was so good that my quesadilla got cold before I finished eating it because I was That engrossed
this one was new. tunnel vision focuses in on the man who’s the same height. the man he’s met before. maybe it’s the fluorescent light, but his once bright blue eyes now seem....darker. not to mention the bags under his eyes. ( he just doesn’t sleep very much, anymore. ) the man with white hair that he’s heard so many things about.
papa. that is what henry called him. how fragile he looked standing across from him in the glass shattered lobby of the hawkins national lab. jim’s head tilts to the side just a little as he continues to watch him step forward into the moon light. “ he was right. how do you prey on the weak when you’re the weakest ? you never cared about any of them. you just wanted to use their powers for your gain. their strength in place of the lack of yours. what a sad man you are. ”
