[photo creds] there’s no reason this should’ve took 171829 years to write n publish but here we are ladies and they/thems
pairing: modern!ellie williams x afab!reader
summary: while taking care of a drunken dina with ellie, the brunette blurts out a secret; changing your already rocky relationship with ellie.
warnings: mdni, 18+. ellie gets mean but we move! brief mention of throwing up. typical language. secretive pining. sorta enemies to lovers. smut at the end. dom!ellie. fingering. some spanking. some overstimulation.
word count: 4.1k
ellie didn’t want to be here.
she knew the next day, she’d tell dina she’s never going with her to a party again, then she’d end up stuck in this position, again. letting dina talk her ear off, drunk out of her mind. while ellie was sober, considering she was the designated driver. not only for dina, but for you.
being dina’s roommate, it made most sense for you to ride with the two. even if ellie wasn’t a fan of the idea, yet found herself adjusting her hair, tucking in the stray pieces of her mullet. and undoing the first few buttons of her dark flannel, realizing she looked too…proper.
it was stupid, her simplistic efforts to look somewhat nicer, she knew it. it’s not like you were going to shower her with compliments.
but you did give her a double-take when you got into the back seat. she noticed. it went straight to her head. maybe it meant nothing, maybe you were judging her. that wouldn’t be shocking. that was your relationship; snide remarks, long gazes, and ignoring each other. being friendly wasn’t really an option, for some reason.
“ellieee,” dina nudged her shoulder, the brunette noticing her stare was elsewhere. her green irises were set on you. you, across the room, an obnoxious smile on your pretty face while chatting some blonde’s ear off. it irritated her. “hm?” she hums.
“you know what they say…about a picture lasting longer–” “shut up, dina,” ellie muttered.
ellie shouldn’t be watching you so obsessively; her eyes were simply drawn to you. an odd sense of anger building inside of her the longer she stared. because why were you laughing so hard at her jokes? and why was she occasionally putting her hand on your arm when she whispered something in your ear?
“you could just walk over there and–” “dina.”
dina shut her mouth, but the sly grin was still on her freckled face. she wouldn’t pressure ellie, but god, she couldn’t stand there and witness the yearning any longer. “i need a drink,” she sighs, she definitely didn’t, but walked away anyways. leaving ellie standing there, looking like a jealous ex for someone she never dated.
she didn’t know if she should be thankful or not that some girl walked up to her and started a conversation, pulling her attention away from you.
especially when she dares to look back, and you’re gone. along with the blonde you had been talking to. any feign interest she had in the stranger before her suddenly dissipated, the forced smile she wore falling flat. did you leave with the girl? maybe take her to some empty bedroom? are you alone with her?
god, she feels pathetic. the way you’re occupying her mind, distracting her from anyone else in the room, from anything else in the world.
she could tell you straight to your face she doesn’t like you. hell, she probably has at some point. but how could she care so much for you, if that were true? it’s not. she knows it’s not, and she hates it.
“ellie?” the girl in front of her had asked, ellie spacing out completely. “hm? yeah, sorry,” she gulps, trying to focus on her, trying to ignore her bothersome thoughts.
it doesn’t last long. not when her wandering eyes travel to you, helping a stumbling dina up the stairs. she mumbles a ‘fuck,’ excusing herself and following behind. she’s able to catch up before you shut the bathroom door in her face, black and white converse in the doorway.
“she okay?” ellie asks, the question stupid and self-explanatory as dina kneels in front of the toilet, unloading the last contents of her previous drink. “use your damn eyes,” you tell ellie, sitting beside the brunette and rubbing her back.
you feel ellie’s heavy glare without having to look at her. “just gonna stand there and watch?” you ask, attitude prevalent in your voice. her brows furrow, throwing her hands up as she speaks, “the fuck am i supposed to do?!”
“maybe get her water?” it’s more so a demand, and ellie obeys, for the sake of dina. but not before rolling her eyes first, shutting the door on her way out. she’s now reminded why you irritate her. your mere presence is irritating. the way you spoke to her like you had authority over her. the way you mirror her.
“jesus,” you sigh, dina chuckling slightly. she mumbles, “i’m guessing it didn’t go well.” the look she gives you is apologetic, though you don’t know what for, or what she’s referencing. “hm?”
“i-i thought you liked her back,” she sighs, placing her hands on her face, “god, she’s probably pissed at me.” what. you look at her wide-eyed, confused at her implications. your relationship with ellie wasn’t perfect. you didn’t hate her, but you couldn’t stand her.
you didn’t like the way she’d eye you in a room full of people, her sparkling green eyes intimidating you. you didn’t like the way she’d make dumb dad jokes that still somehow made you laugh, when no one else did. you didn’t like the way she could be so damn charismatic, but it was never shown toward you. all her sweet traits, were never shown toward you. so, you did the same.
which is why dina’s words leave you frozen, your hand stopping the rhythmic motion it had on her back. she catches on quickly, realizing she should’ve kept her mouth shut. way too late. “y/n–” there’s a short knock on the door, ellie entering before dina can explain herself.
“here,” ellie gives a sympathetic smile, handing the brunette the bottle of water, then glancing at you. it doesn’t take her long to realize she had interrupted something. she doesn’t pry. “think it’s time to leave, yeah?”
dina nods, a tight-lipped smile as she looks between you two, “probably.”
you remain silent, helping the girl up, and letting her hold onto you as you walk out. ellie occasionally looks back as you make your way out of the house, but not checking on dina. she looked at you, and you refused to bring your eyes to hers. she takes it as you being an asshole. nothing new. truth is, you hadn’t let what dina revealed, go.
even when you got to the auburn-haired girl's truck, sitting in the back with dina, feeling her gaze on you through the rearview mirror. not once has your mind shifted to anything else. it’s like a puzzle you’re trying to solve in your head– except it’s not hard –it just makes no sense. ellie thinking about you in a positive light, admiring you, and expressing it to dina, makes no sense.
the car ride home had felt extremely long. you had tuned out dina’s attempt at small talk, and ellie’s short responses. both of them trying to ignore the odd tension that lingered since you left that damn bathroom, and you simply couldn’t. you almost want to ignore it, act like dina didn’t say a damn thing. but that’s impossible.
ellie flicks on the lights to your dark apartment, dina groaning at the sudden bright contrast. “sorry,” ellie mumbles, playing with her fingers as the brunette leans on you as you walk her to her room. you sense ellie slowly trailing behind, the girl watching as you practically tuck dina in bed.
“thanks,” dina sheepishly smiles, heavy lids glancing between you and ellie, “i’ll make tonight up to you, promise.”
“don’t worry ‘bout it,” you shrug, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. you look to ellie, before leaving the room, letting her say bye and going to your own bedroom. but you can’t move the second you step inside, leaning against the closed door and cursing to yourself.
it feels wrong, to let the night end like this. to let…that…go unresolved. you listen to the creak of the wooden floor, noting ellie was leaving, and you couldn’t let her.
you open your door, your hurried footsteps catch her attention. she pauses at the front door, eyeing you curiously. “what?”
“dina…told me.” your voice is quiet, speaking as though you’re unsure what you’re saying. you plant your feet on the floor once you’re a few feet away, trying to prepare yourself for wherever this conversation may lead. it might be great. might be awful. probably going to be fucking terrible. ellie crosses her arms, “dina told you…?”
“i guess she didn’t— god —she implied, that you…like…me?”
you want to bash your head into the nearest wall at how stupid you sound. you feel even more humiliated at the way she’s looking at you; like you just told her the worlds unfunniest joke. she speaks harshly, “dina’s drunk.”
“i know–“ “and i’m not fucking…into you.”
ouch. it’s not just the comment itself, but the way ellie says it like it’s the most bizarre concept on planet earth. as though she cannot imagine liking you in any sense of the word, platonic or romantic, simply at all.
you knew you should’ve expected a negative reaction, the accusation was bold, knowing her. knowing she’s never once expressed any interest in you at all.
she gave you judgmental glares, not gazes of admiration. she laughed at you, not with you. suddenly, you feel like a fool for even entertaining the idea that dina’s comment had any sort of truth to it. now, you’re bitter.
“good,” you mutter, “rather stay single for the rest of my damn life than date someone like you.”
your statement catches her off guard, embarrassingly offended by it; by you saying it to her. she scoffs. “well, that’s not really hard for you, is it?” she tilts her head, “been single since what? eighth grade?”
you don’t respond this time, her comment stirring an insecurity in you that you haven’t acknowledged. and she’s not done. “spent the night clinging to that blonde who was clearly uninterested…i don’t blame her–” she humorlessly chuckles, “you’re fucking pathetic, y/n.”
now it’s your turn to feel embarrassed, unaware ellie had even watched you at the party; had you seen close as fuck with some girl you barely knew. even if ellie didn’t know you were the one that denied the girl’s advances.
“shut up, williams,” you speak so quietly, the weak attempt at a warning going over her head. she doesn’t care, dina’s revelation caused her walls to go up, even more than they already were. now you had to face the wrath.
“you’d be lucky if i liked you. only fucking person who would,” ellie says, an anger flashing in her eyes as yours dimmed with desolation. her unkind words had cut deep, like a knife twisting in a preexisting wound.
shockingly, the girl realizes she had genuinely hurt you. that she wasn’t just being annoying, as she often was, but she was mean. flat out mean, venom on her tongue.
as though she was still talking to the person at the party, the one that spent their whole time with a stranger, laughing at their jokes, blinking their eyelashes sweetly. but that’s not the case, you’re actually giving her the attention she so desperately, and secretly, wanted. and she had ruined it. her furrowed brows relax in the slightest, “y/n–” “go. get out.”
you had spoken so quietly, she remained still, trying to figure out how to fix this in the next few seconds. not possible. “fucking go, ellie.”
this time, she listens, a faint nod, and turns around, exiting through the door behind her. you stand there for a moment, trying to comprehend what the fuck just happened. how ellie had taken your heart and stomped it, despite it never belonging to her in the first place.
it’s almost painful, the way she had fucking made it hard for you to sleep, embarrassment piled up in the deep pit of your stomach.
which continues on the next day. ellie had plagued your mind. your heart drops when you think about it, and the way she looked at you, the way she spoke to you. you should get over it, yet it only makes you even more mad at her. you want to avoid her forever.
that wasn’t realistic.
she seemed to be over every fucking day of the week, forcing you to stay in your bedroom while she laughed with dina in the living room as they watched some shitty eighties movie together. you used to join them, sitting on the opposite side of the couch from her, but not even that was enough for you to comfortably be in the same room with her right now.
you did a good job of avoiding her, until one night you’re leaving the bathroom, the girl right outside of it. her green irises bore into you, not moving, trapping you in the doorway. she takes the opportunity, “can we talk?”
no, you want to say, but her doe eyes convince you otherwise. “you’re talking, aren’t you?” she doesn’t mind the attitude in your tone, she had deserved it. she mumbles, scratching the back of her neck, “yea, yea i am.”
“what i said to you…wasn’t cool,” she shamefully admits. the memories of the night hit her at once, the sadness she had caused. she shakes her head, “and i didn’t mean it…and i’m sorry– like really, really, sorry.”
god, she cringes at herself. she doesn’t apologize often, not really ever needing a reason to. and now it felt like her life depended on it, as if she would literally drop dead if you didn’t forgive her. luckily, that wasn’t the case.
“it’s fine, ellie,” you tell her, sensing that she’s being genuine. though, it doesn’t have you bursting with joy and ready to engulf her into a hug, the stubborn part of you not even wanting to show her you accept it.
“thank you,” she breathes out, fiddling with her fingers, knowing she only was only halfway done. now it was the hard part.
“i don’t know what dina told you that night, but i do…” she trails off, unable to finish the sentence. she goes completely quiet, head tilting downward, not having the courage to look at you. “you what, ellie?”
her heart is beating rapidly, and for some reason, yours is beating in sync. you’re anxious, seconds passing in silence before she finally brings her light eyes to meet yours.
they say a lot without saying anything at all. the light brunch of her brows and her lips parted slightly, glancing at the soft skin of your lips. and you do the same to her– the girl suddenly leans forward and presses her lips against yours. what the fuck.
it almost surprises you at how gentle she was, and how she cradled the sides of your face so softly like you’re made of glass– like she’d hurt you otherwise; she’s done that enough. and she has a lot to make up for.
you’re disappointed when she draws away, but don’t have time to complain or pull her back, the call of her name from dina breaking the bubble you two were in. “i– should uh,” she backs away, you nod, “yeah, yeah you should.” she clears her throat, giving you one last look, before walking back to dina.
neither of you saw the shy smiles that crept on each other's faces.
the next week, you’re waiting for dina to come home from jesse’s, deciding you were going to tell her what happened with ellie. from the night of the party, considering she was still out of the loop, and you had a lot to confess.
and like ellie could tell you’re thinking about her, she shows up at your door, a rhythmic knock that almost startles you from your spot on the couch. you open the door, and out of habit, you assume she’s not there for you. “dina’s not home,” you nervously tell her, the girl slightly confused. “wanted to see you.”
“oh.” the heat rushes to your cheeks, stepping aside and letting her in. not without admiring how pretty she looked without even trying, a damn grey hoodie and dark-washed jeans that made her look so tantalizing, you could just eat her up.
neither of you speaks for a moment, unsure what exactly to say, despite the several thoughts that were floating in both of your minds. you awkwardly break the silence, “did you uh…wanna drink?”
“oh– yeah, sure,” she gives a tight-lipped smile, tucking her hands in the pocket of her hoodie, slowly trailing you to the kitchen. it was a lie, and truthfully, she wanted to skip the incoming small talk. “actually y/n, i– uh,” she sighed, “i’ve been thinking about that night.”
you halt your movements, turning around and looking at her. “you have?” “you haven’t?” she asks back, to which you quickly shake your head. “no– no, i mean yeah, i have,” you stutter, ellie laughing quietly, but not maliciously. she found it cute, she found you cute. “it’s all i think about, ellie,” you find the courage to admit, leaning against the hard counter.
“yeah?” “mhm.”
she approaches you, till she’s standing directly in front of you. once again, your heart is racing incredibly fast, being so fucking close to her. ellie was always intimidating, but now it was worse. now you feel incredibly vulnerable with her, something you’re weary of, but also don’t completely mind.
the long-lived tension between you has boiled over, with the best possible outcome; ellie kissing you again, hands traveling to your jaw, again. you relish in the way she feels against you, like something you’ve been waiting for, which it sort of was. not something you would admit to her, though.
the kiss deepens, but you notice she’s still being just as delicate as the first time. holding you so firmly, yet so gently. not daring to explore your body with her hands, to touch you in the places you craved. she’s holding back and you know it. “ellie,” you sigh, placing your hand on her chest, “you don’t have to be so…gentle.”
“y-you sure?” she asks softly, blushing at the way you look at her with such awe and desire. she’s not sure if she deserves this, deserves you. but she wasn’t going to waste this opportunity. she had studied your figure the whole night of the damned party, now she had it under her fingertips, and most importantly, you want it. you want her. you whisper, “not gonna break, ellie.”
there’s a smile on her face before she reconnects your lips, moving feverishly, to the point you had to catch up with her. one of her hands had dropped from your face, meeting your hip, and going under your shirt. the goosebumps creep under your skin when her palm gropes your breast, not regretting skipping a bra today. “fuck,” she breathes against your lips, “take it off.”
you don’t hesitate, freeing yourself from the fabric that clung tightly to you, feeling both shy and relieved when the air hits your bare torso. you swallow hard. ellie’s cheeks are red and her pupils are blown, shamelessly admiring the sight in front of her. ellie knew you were attractive– but fuck.
suddenly her mouth is attached to your neck, your head tilted upward slightly as she sucks harshly, while both of her hands are on your breasts. she was grabbing them roughly, and surprises you when she gives your nipples a harsh tug. the noises you make are the sweetest reward. she chuckles, “really are desperate.”
“shut up.” “shut up?”
“mhm,” you mumble, lustful eyes matching her own, “shut up and fuck me.”
that’s all she needs.
you gasp when she manhandles you, forcing you to turn around. her palm presses against your back, causing you to bend over, the cool granite of the counter against your skin sending shivers down your body. at first, you feel her wet lips on your shoulder, down to your back, and down your spine. somehow, it felt like she was kissing you everywhere at once.
her hands travel down the sides of your waist, creeping carefully on the edges of your pajama shorts. it’s excruciating, waiting for her to fucking do something, it seemed as though she was taking her time. fingertips just dancing around the fabric, a smug smile on her face as your legs ever so barely twitched. “didn’t tell you why i was mad that night.”
“what?” you ask, confused as to why she was bringing that up, at this moment. but she doesn’t pause what she’s doing, hooking her fingers around both your underwear and pajama shorts, tugging them down at the same time.
you shudder at the feeling, completely exposed for her. she gets the biggest ego boost in the world seeing your dripping cunt on display, knowing it was all for her. she sighs, “i watched you all night. watched you touch her…watched her touch you.”
“ellie–” you whisper, the girl nudging your legs to open wider, barely toying with your pussy. she’s teasing you, gently brushing over your clit, which was aching for attention.
she doesn’t have self-control though, pressing on the sensitive spot, and rubbing sweet circles. her pace was quick, the friction was perfect. enough for you, but not enough for her. she rasps, “fucking pissed me off.”
with that, she pushes two of her fingers inside of you, sinking them to the knuckle. holy fuck. the moan that escapes your lips goes straight to her own pussy, but she tries to pay no attention to it. right now, you’re all that matters.
your eyes flutter shut, the girl slowly working her fingers in and out of you, letting you get used to the electrifying feeling. the way she grazes your g spot, and when she leans over to bite your shoulder, her digits press hard against it. you squirm, and she decides she wants more from you.
she moves faster, pumping them briskly, all while you grow more wet around her. the lewd noises filling the silence of the apartment, but your mind is too hazy to be embarrassed. ellie is the only thing you could think about right now; how fucking good she made you feel.
you whimper, unsure how she managed to fuck you harder and deeper with her slender fingers. it causes you to stutter her name, pressing your ass against her, her lips parting slightly at how needy you’ve become.
you can’t form a coherent thought– you can’t speak a coherent sentence. she dares to push a third finger in, seeing if you can take it, despite how tight you already are. and you do, but not without a whine leaving your pretty mouth, drool on the counter at this point. “only i can touch you like this, right?”
you don’t answer her question, honestly, her voice is a blur in your ear. so, she smacks your ass, and asks again, somewhat sternly. “yes– yes!” you cry, one last push of her fingers inside of you causing you to pulsate around her. you moan her name, or an attempt at her name.
she doesn’t halt her movements, fucking you frantically through your orgasm. you bring one of your hands to your mouth, biting down on it to muffle yourself. ellie notices. she doesn’t like it.
she uses her free hand to grab your arm, holding it against your back, letting the spew of loud pathetic moans leave your lips.
your body has a mere second to relax when she pulls her fingers out of you, until she presses them flat against your throbbing cunt. her hand moves back and forth, quickly, and messily, your cum dripping onto the tile floor.
her hot breath is on your skin as she’s bent over you, towering, your eyes squeezed closed in a beautiful mix of ecstasy and overstimulation. you feel lightheaded, she was relentless. ellie only stops when she hears the jangling of keys in the front door, and you almost kick her away. fuck.
you grab your shirt, tugging it over your body, too focused on fixing yourself to see ellie casually sucking your release off her fingers. you wiggle into your shorts, looking up at the girl, who was admiring you.
“just gonna stand there?” “want me to clean you up?”
“no,” you sigh, hearing the door open, “just…keep her busy.” you push her away gently, but she doesn’t leave. she leans in, kissing you again, short, but sweet. as though it was a goodbye kiss, but she doesn’t plan on leaving your apartment that night. and she didn’t.
Not trying to demand anything, but do you think you’ll ever draw Smudger and/or narrow gauge Stanley? Your art is gorgeous and I’m sure they’d look great in your style, whether as engines or as humans. Either way, thank you for sharing so much art with us all!
I actually have drawn him before! Although these are shitposts hjdhhss
Happy day 400!!! To everyone apart of my world @fishtastical @mockiingbiirdm @bazzlethebiohazard @indiartz and everyone else that doesn’t have tumblr!!
