#you know?

[goldensunset]

‘character who’s tired of being a person’ + ‘character who’s tired of not being a person’

[okaydays]

It hits Shane one evening, when they’re relaxing together on the couch in the house they own together, that he’s achieved something he didn’t even consciously realise he had set as a goal.

He’s created a place where Ilya feels safe.

To some extent, Shane knew they sort of always had something like that - in 1410, in 1221, in countless hotel rooms that then became the homes they had separately, in Boston and Montreal - but this, obviously, is different. It’s different in the best way.

He looks down at Ilya, fast asleep with his head in Shane’s lap, covered in a blanket. His eyelashes are so long. There’s no furrow in his brow, and his mouth is just slightly open. He makes the kind of snuffling, clicky noises that he only makes when he’s sleeping really comfortably and really well.

This is a house they share. Ilya’s stuff is safe here. Their dog is safe here. Ilya can fall asleep on Shane’s lap on the couch with the knowledge that he’s safe and loved and cared for in every single moment. He doesn’t have to tiptoe around or worry about someone’s mood or censor himself in the way that Shane imagines he had to do when he was a child, after Irina passed and the house lost all its warmth. Here, Ilya and everything he is is treasured. He’s safe.

Shane smiles and wraps a finger around a loose curl, scritches at his scalp gently enough that it doesn’t wake him. Ilya purrs a little in his sleep. They’re all good here.

[unpretty]

ANOTHER thing i will say about self-pub/indie media of all kinds is that people are always quick to warn you that to find the good stuff you must first endure a lot of bad stuff you don't enjoy. that qualifier like "oh you will read nine bad things to find one kind of good thing but you must persist". but i don't know what corporate media people are enjoying that has a better hit rate than that. there's corporate media that cost millions to make that's so bad people start weird conspiracies about it. "most of it sucks if you have taste" is not a problem exclusive to self-pub. some of the highest grossing movies of 2025 were "we took that thing you liked and made it live action for some reason". if you clicked a link to a free thing one time and you thought the art was ugly or the acting was bad or it was full of typos i simply cannot bring myself to care about your need to warn people that It Could Happen To Them.

[teaboot]

Hi man! Geniune question. I think I saw one of your posts talking about being aro and like as an aro person myself I wanted to ask how do you work on accepting yourself for how you are? Like idk mb you've got some tips or life philosophies for that specific thing. I'm kinda struggling with this at the moment, would appreciate some advice. If you do find a desire to share thanks in advance

Man, that's a difficult question. I'm not even sure I have a concrete answer, just *my* answer?

The thing is... yeah, I'm not immune to being lonely. All my friends and family and coworkers and everyone seems to have a partner, and I... don't. And I envy that, a little. They get to wake up next to someone, and sit quietly with someone, and *know* someone- and not just surface-level stuff, but... hopes, dreams, fears, insecurities, likes and dislikes. Behaviours and patterns, habits, preferences.

And I KNOW it's not perfect, nothing ever is, but it's that mutual support and understanding I can only imagine must be... satisfying, I guess. Having someone you know you're improving life for, who doesn't need you to live, but for some reason or another prefers to live with your proximity like it's some kind of luxury one might enjoy experiencing.

I want those things. But for a lot of people- most of the world- those things mean other things too, like "having sex" and "being married" and "producing children", "splitting one bedroom", "having a partner at all", and all kinds of other stuff I don't especially need, want, or think about.

So like... I try to imagine what the perfect "standard" partnership or relationship or whatever would be for ME, if I just woke up one day and had one. And it doesn't have those things. So I figure, you know. *Why* I feel this way doesn't really matter, right? Whether I was born like this or not, or if it's normal or not, or if I COULD put up with those things for the sake of having the good parts I DO want.... it doesn't matter, kind of?

It's just another boundary, or limit, or preference, like any other deal breaker. Like refusing to date someone who chain-smokes or having a severe dog allergy or something.

I'm not a freak, or a "cold fish", or broken or anything. It's just that the ideal partner/s for ME is someone/s who *also* wants what I want. My ideal relationship is someone or someoneS who are okay with never fucking, or maybe not living together, or maybe nobody at all, and if I happen to make a friend or meet a person who is perfect in every OTHER area but that, then it isn't that it's my fault- it's that we weren't *actually* a good match to begin with. They were a ten, but they chain-smoked. They were a ten, but they wanted a dog really bad. They were a ten, but I couldn't deal with them chewing with their mouth open all the time.

So when I boil everything down, I don't ACTUALLY wish I could experience a powerful singular romance the way everyone else does- I just want strong relationships, people I trust, emotional intimacy, and cohabitation.

And there's no reason why I can't HAVE those things exactly the way I am.

Do I feel like I'm missing out sometimes? That it would be easier to develop these relationships if I was the same as the majority? Sure I do. That's just a numbers game. Bigger ocean means more fish.

But I also know that a traditional experience isn't what I WANT, and it wouldn't make me happy.

And if the point is to find people who you can be happy with, why wish for that?

At this point, wishing I enjoyed traditional romance or traditional sex is like wishing I enjoyed the taste of dirt so I could enjoy the experience of eating dirt, when I could just... not eat dirt?

Lke. I already don't eat dirt

There are already so many things I like eating that AREN'T dirt

Seems pretty straightforward

[keltbh]

[boitterfly]

shane hollander x a well respected man by the kinks

[ourstarman]

The class difference between Remus and Sirius is actually so important to me