#youwantedthis

[bitchkravt]

When someone is stalking you because they think you are stalking them, it makes you wonder who really is the true stalker?

Shannon L. Alder

[the-lonely-depression]

You wanted in my head....

I'm scrolling through Pinterest, and my first idea was to save and send you everything I saw that reminded me of you. After 25, I decided maybe that's not the best use of my time.... :D

[korshunmitch]

View this post on Instagram

I will tell my story the best way I know how. Soon I'll let it out 🙏 #youwantedthis

[emilycaitlindaysgobye-blog]

The turning point

My life was awesome. I mean it is awesome now but in a whole new light. I was a resent college grad. Living in a place I learned to love and with someone who I loved deeply or so I thought. 

The first sign that my life was going to take a turn was when I moved back home with my parents. Don't get me wrong, I love them dearly. But I was leaving so many friends, my work place I loved and the guy I loved to move home to save a few extra bucks. Well lets face it, moving home sucked! I was never the out going one in high school so I didn't have many friends to begin with and what friends I did have no longer live any where close. Really all I had to hang out with was my parents. So it was like I was starting over.

I stayed with my company I was working with and just took a transfer. I had to add a 30 minute commute and dealing with over privileged people to my job description for sucky pay. I had to now work for someone who did not approve of any type of communication with co workers. You we're expected to come in in silence, do our work and then leave. Couldn't even ask how someone was doing. I wasn't very good at that to say the least. My only constant in my life was the man i thought I loved.

When I looked at my future he was in it and I was so excited he was! The little time apart felt like nothing and was always so exciting when we saw each other again. Then one visit changed everything. When I learn about his future plans and how I was no included in them, I was devastated. and being told that we had no future for the next couple years but could make it work again, I just could wrap my head around it. So my replay to all this as we drove over those horrible long bridges was "Then break up with me now instead of dragging this out when we both know the out come" to my surprise was "no I can't break up with you!". I thought to myself, wow maybe he does really love me. 4 days later after I returned home I got a call. "I gave it some thought about what you said. We should break up and there is no changing my mind" What could I do? I was helpless. I couldn't drive across town and be with him. Being 3 states away ruined everything.

I was so heart broken the next week. I didn't go to work. I didn't speak to anyone, well now I truly had no one. But I had no one to blame but myself. I was the one who asked to break up at least that was I told time and time again. "You wanted this!"

[dancubacub-blog]

Fuck feeling like this