“If only you could see yourself as I see you” with red wine?
sorry for taking a bit to respond, and thank you for the ask maddie! i just had a lot of thoughts about this, and i hope that you like how it ended up! it’s all under the cut!
49.“If only you could see yourself as I see you”
Red Wine would admit that it was now an odd day where he didn’t see Cheesecake. Perhaps it was because the two were in a relationship, and he simply felt attached to them. It wasn’t like the two were at the hip, but it felt odd to not see them after a few hours or so.
Normally after being away for so long, Red Wine would have immediately sought out their company. However, he had been continually sent out on missions and requests from their Master Attendant, and found himself too busy to do as he pleased. Which left himself much more upset than he would like to admit.
So when he finally was able to find himself alone with them, he immediately went to wrap them up in his arms, pulling their back into his chest. He expected them to do as they usually would, turn around and reach up for a kiss.
Instead they continued to focus on their sword, polishing it. He could see their brows furrowed in their reflection, biting into their bottom lip. He could have excused this as them being focused on their sword, had they not been so tense, had he not known that them cleaning their sword was a nervous habit.
“My darling, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
He placed a hand over the one holding the sword’s hilt. “You know that is a flimsy excuse. Tell me the truth. What’s upsetting you?”
They paused their polishing, before moving to put down the sword and look at him. “Why did you choose me?”
“What do you mean? Why wouldn’t I choose you?”
They picked at the ruffles in their cuff, “I mean, I don’t fit your image. You’re so regal, ethereal. And I’m just a warrior. And I just, it’s hard for me to believe it sometimes.”
Cheesecake shifted away from him, now fully focused on their cuff, trying to look away from him.
“Has someone told you this? Is someone trying to insinuate that you’re not good enough for me?”
“No, I’m just…”
He gave them a pointed look, eyebrow raised. They let out a defeated sigh before nodding.
“I’ve overheard a few customers at the restaurant. It’s just a few remarks, about how off putting it is to see us together. That I’m so...rough compared to you. That someone more elegant would be more fitting.”
“As if you aren’t elegant! Have you seen yourself with your rapier? I’ve never seen someone make dueling look like dancing the way you do. And why would I care if you are elegant? Or if someone is put off by seeing us? Their petty jealousies are just that, petty.”
They still didn’t look up at him, but their movements and fidgeting had paused.
“Cheesecake, look at me.”
They shifted only slightly, glancing up through their bangs.
“Love, please.”
They sat up fully, now facing him. He could see that their eyes were slightly watery, glassy.
“Why are you crying, love?”
“I’m sorry. God, I hate being vulnerable, I don’t want to bother you with this! I’m supposed to be level headed, calm. Not-not so insecure and sad! You have to think I’m being pretty pathetic now.”
Red Wine let out a small snort, now gently holding Cheesecake’s face in his hands. “You, pathetic? You’re allowed to be vulnerable, you should be vulnerable around me. Darling, you truly need to see yourself as you are. Oh, if only you could see yourself as I see you. ”
They gave him a soft smile as he brushed away some tears. They put a hand over his, kissing the palm of it. “Thank you, my love. I, it may take me awhile to truly accept it, but it means so much. Thank you, thank you for letting me be vulnerable.”
“Don’t thank me, I know you’d do the same for me. I love you too much, either ways, to let you think otherwise.”
He leaned down to press his forehead on to theirs, and they stayed like that for a while, just relaxing in each other’s pressence.
