“It’s Just the Internet.”
Request: would you write a yuri pliset. imagine where his f!SO (streamer maybe) and he found her in a bad state (nothing physical mostly emotional) and he comforts her?
Title: “It’s Just the Internet.”
Genre: mostly angst - i can’t lie, a tiny portion of fluff, and a large amount of comfort
Pairing: Yuri Plisetsky x Fem!Reader
Notes: I’ve got more for you all! I think I’ve noticed a pattern amongst what you guys like from me, too, lol. Anyway, I tried to use what most streamers (and general internet personas) deal with from people on the internet - hate, stress, lack of privacy (as nasty as all of these are in everyday life).
With that said, I will put a disclaimer here for anybody that feels uncomfortable with the aforementioned: This imagine deals with tense topics such as online bullying, unsavory body image, and chronic stress along with burnout. If you don’t feel comfortable reading about these things, I advise you now to read something else or proceed with caution.
I feel like I should also mention that this semi-struck a chord with me, and it would have been great to have someone beside me in the moment, so part of this may be me projecting - either way, I hope you enjoy it!
Below the cut!
‘omg, her hair. who’s gonna tell her’
‘i hate her voice, its too high like..why does she even stream.’
‘honestly, who decided to give her a platform? her personality sucks.’
Suck it in, suck it up, and start the stream.
‘OMG. SHUT UP. YOU ARE A TERRIBLE GAMER. QUIT YOUR DAY JOB ALREADY.’
‘Why tf is your hair so greasy? we get it, you’re a horrible person, you don’t have to have horrible hygiene.’
Suck it in, suck it up, and start the stream.
Suck it in, suck it up, and start the stream.
Suck it in.
‘lose some weight, you fat cow.’
Suck it up.
‘why are you so lazy, get up already.’
Start the stream.
I pressed the button after preparing my smile for the umpteenth time in the hour, and while I would have liked to cut the stream at all today, I can’t disappoint my fans. The ones that stay for the content, at least.
I let my internal timer go off before I flipped the screen image to my face.
“Hey, everyone!”
And so we begin.
The many ticking seconds, minutes, and eventually hours invaded my head - but I couldn’t crack. I can’t give them the satisfaction of seeing what up and coming nasty comment can do to my psyche. I can’t let them think they can win.
Still, I can barely function with their words haunting me.
The stream ended after almost four hours, and as I sent my goodbye to the viewers, I could feel my chest start to tighten and my eyes start to burn. My heart was beating at what felt like a million miles per hour, my whole body was trembling, and I could swear that I was about to pass out.
I slid the chair I was in back from my desk and ran to the bathroom. Considering the time I started the stream and the time now, it had to be around 3 or 4 pm. With that in mind, more people would be flocking to the highlights or my personal Instagram. If they were going to flock over, then there is bound to be more from them.
I’m never gonna get past this, am I?
Tears were streaming down my face, hot and haunting. I was, quite literally, a mess on the bathroom floor. I had gone through what I could manage in regards to tissues, but as it got harder to maintain my balance, I cradled myself in my arms and curled into a ball.
I was beginning to hyperventilate, so I forced myself to take deep breaths. I have no idea how long it took, but as my breath slowed down and I stopped crying. I was still in a ball, but I had loosened up a little bit and decided to distract myself with some work.
I hesitantly stood up, stumbling on my legs for a second, and wiped my tear-stained cheeks. With a sigh and a sniffle, I shuffled to my office again and opened up my editing software.
Even if people don’t like me, the people that do deserve something done well to make up for where I fail to do well. I may not be a very good gamer, but I will flex my editing skills and do what I can with what footage I have.
I quickly got to work, and though I got caught off guard by my performance in the recorded footage, I pushed through and slammed a zoom-in during a pause right before I ended up throwing my headphones onto my desk. I wasn’t doing well at all during the gameplay, but I have to try and make it seem like I did well.
Time seemed to pass by quicker when I wasn’t focusing on anything else except what makes my day better - a cup of coffee, editing software, and lo-fi music in the background.
That was, until I had to upload the next video on the queue. It was an indie horror game, and knowing how scared I can get, I was already anticipating what was going to come up in the comments. I didn’t want to fathom it, but my mind races sometimes...
‘scared? no wonder you suck at horror games, you’re already trash at regular games.’
‘OMG YOURE SO BAD AT THISSS HAHAAA QUIT YOUR DAMN JOB LOSER’
‘Dear god, you suck. How did you even manage to make it that far in the game?’
My breath was gonna get caught again, I could tell. I considered postponing the upload to tomorrow, but again - the fans that actually did care looked forward to this.
Or did they just watch to get their kicks and the good comments are ironic?
No, no, no, no, no - dammit, no! They mean it, they really mean it, they love to watch you - upload the video!
I almost pressed the upload button, but I stopped myself as my index finger was just a second away from clicking. I can’t do it today, I really can’t, seriously. If I end up doing this, I’m only gonna hole myself up more. If I do that, then my content is gonna much more horrid than it already is, and if that happens-
“Babe, I’m home!”
Time stopped, and only then was I aware of how shaken I was. Trembling, sweating, and my eyes were getting glassy again. Of course, it had to happen again.
“Babe, are you in your - (Y/N), baby? What is it?”
Yurio saw me. He saw me. This is the one thing that would, could, and should have been avoided. Now he’s gonna freak out, and knowing his anger, go off on social media and start up a shitstorm.
“(Y/N), look at me. (Y/N).”
I felt his nimble fingers lightly brush my shoulder. He had made contact with the chair I was seated in and turned it around, making eye contact with me before I directed my eyes down. “...What is it, Yuri?”
He glared at me before kneeling and, yet again, making eye contact with me. “What’s going on, darling?”
I sniffled and he waited, quiet and patient, as I slowly cracked. More tears fell down my face, I curled into myself even more, and my hands started trembling violently. Yurio’s eyes went wide and he grasped my hands in his as quickly as he could.
“Darling, come on. Come here, don’t talk, okay? We can lay down on the bed, and you can relax, okay?” His blue-green eyes were focused on my face. “You can tell me later if you want, but right now, you need to take a break.”
He guided me from my spot and moved with me despite how slow and sluggish I was. Short, sweet, reassuring words were uttered into my ears breathlessly yet urgent as we both made it to our shared room.
The blankets felt like clouds when I laid down on them, yet I failed to focus on the comfort and instead focus on holding onto Yurio’s form. It was just muscular enough to provide comfort even if he was very thin.
I shuffled into his chest, the both of us being splayed out on the bed as gently as possible. Little jostling around followed after we were settled.
Yurio wrapped his arms around my body and started rubbing my back - it would be romantic had I not been a bawling mess, but I will take what I can since I need the comfort right now (as much as I may hate to admit it).
“(Y/N), darling, I’m right here. I’ll always be here. Now, please, get some rest,” he pleaded, voice soft yet commanding. I sniffled once again and nodded, continuing to get closer to the blonde.
I stopped crying eventually, but I wasn’t quite able to tell how long it had been. All I can recall is finishing my crying session and falling asleep.
The faded light of the sun peeking through the transparent curtains shook me from my slumber, and upon feeling the other side of the bed empty, I became fully awake.
“Yurio?” I lifted my tired body from the sheets and left the bed, leaving the room to find him. A large yawn overtook me before I started to search the house.
I had been through the living area, the workout/dance room in the basement, and the bathrooms on all three floors before I found him. He was standing in the backyard, seemingly having just left the kitchen, and we shouting into his cell. He was most definitely livid.
I sighed, proceeding to take a deep breath before turning around and reaching for the refrigerator. If there was water anywhere, I’d love to find it, especially after last night.
My mood dropped at the thought of it, but before I could dwell on it any longer, I heard a door slam and Yurio walk in while muttering profanities under his breath. He slammed his phone on the kitchen island before sighing and resting his elbows on the marble.
I paused my movement, looking over my shoulder at him. “What’s going on with you today, huh?”
Yurio clicked his tongue, turning from the island and facing me. He was still a little bitter, but he visibly softened up a little bit when he met my eyes. “It’s nothing, just some publicity bullshit that I’m trying to work out.”
I raised an eyebrow, smirking just the slightest before shaking my head. “So that’s why you were in such a tizzy, huh?” I inquired, watching as he rolled his eyes and slinked towards me. He had me corner against the fridge as I maintained my eye contact.
He kept his gaze focused on the cell in his hand, keeping a white-knuckle grip on the device. “I guess, yeah. I do need to ask you something, though,” he started. It made me nervous, but I decided to humor him.
“Well, why the warning? Fire away.”
“Is everything alright?”
I hummed, shrugging and moving away from the appliance I had been leaning on. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Why? You worried?”
Silence invaded the kitchen for a few seconds before Yurio pouted and grunted, turning away and murmuring, “Maybe....” I chuckled a little before reaching for the cupboard with mugs in it.
My wrist was gently grabbed before I could get a hold of my favorite (Movie) mug. “Why don’t we go out for breakfast today? Practice was cancelled today and we haven’t spent much time together recently.”
If it were possible, I could swear that my eyes were sparkling. “Do you care where we go?”
“I was thinking (Your/Favorite/Breakfast/Place), since I know you love it.” He was trying so hard to be nonchalant, but he still gets flustered even years later. Cute!
“Yes!” was my enthusiastic response. “I’ll start getting ready if you’re down to leave in about fifteen minutes!”
A smirk graced his features, and he gave a nod. I ran upstairs and started getting into what I felt comfortable wearing.
He entered the room once I was done and threw a sweatshirt on - still with his oh-so-favorite leopard print on the panels - and held a nimble hand out for me. I held it, and we left for food.
Breakfast went pretty well, but I had to stream again tonight. Three nights a week, sometimes a fourth when needed. Shit.
We were almost home when the thought finally dawned on me. And this time. Yurio would be home the whole time. My eyes went wide at the thought, and had it not been for his grip on my hand, I would have absolutely broken. Again.
“Hey, I was thinking about tonight. You have another stream scheduled, right?”
“Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. Why’re you asking?” I inquired, looking at his eyes as they focused on the street signs. He never really asks, so this was odd to say the least.
Clearing his throat, he suggested something that he’s never really suggested before. “Well, you got that new racing game, right? Why don’t we play together. 1 v. 1, boyfriend v. girlfriend?”
That...actually didn’t sound half bad. Nobody really knew that we had been dating except for a select few people, and we had both been considering announcing it sometime, so this might be the best time. It may also be better for me mentally.
But he’d still see the comments.
That can’t happen. If it happens, I’m gonna get interrogated and Yurio’s gonna go ballistic on Twitter. If that happens, more hate is gonna come in and he’s gonna have so much bull to deal with from his manager. And that’s gonna fade into my streams, and then the comments will get even worse-
“Babe? Hey, earth to (Y/n). Are you still in there?”
I blinked a couple times, sniffling a bitt and nodding. “Yeah, yeah, I’m still here. And that sounds great! I’ll let you know when it starts, and get it set up.”
He nodded, and we continued on our way to our home. When we arrived, I went to my office/game room and he went to the gym area in the basement (with the both of us announcing what we were doing, of course).
I went to editing the stream from last night, cutting out what needed to be and editing what needed to be before finishing around two in the afternoon. I started to upload and went to getting the gaming setup prepared for tonight.
My mind was still flooded with thoughts of what could happen tonight. So much could go wrong, in theory, but so much could go right, as well. People might lay off, but then again, it’s the internet - it couldn’t be helped, what with the utter chaos than can be released when someone decides to release it.
I sighed, running my hands through my hair. The only two options that I have at the moment are to cancel the stream last minute and wait until tomorrow or go through with the stream and risk him noticing. Either way, Yuri would be suspicious and the people that actually care to watch my streams for myself and not to trash me would be disappointed.
Damn decisions...just had to do this, didn’t you?
With a deep breath in, I had finally decided to go through with the stream. Mods have tried to get people kicked and banned from the server, so I’m just gonna have to rely on them unless I want to cut it early when it gets too harsh. Anything yo make sure that Yuri doesn’t see it.
I finished getting everything set up after I took a short breather, making sure that my sweatshirt and makeup were alright. I made sure to take extra time for it since Yuri was joining the stream and I wanted to avoid any of the comments as best as possible. Everything seemed to be in place, now all I needed to do was make sure that the video uploaded and the streaming screen was prepared.
I checked the upload process and let it sit for a little while before opening Twitch and getting the recording program setup. Once that was done, I grabbed my usual controller and one for Yuri and laid them on my desk before leaving to grab a soda and relax for a bit until then - as best as I could, rather.
With the can of (soda) in my hand, I stayed still by the fridge and continued thinking. I’d think it’d be a good idea to warn my mods and advise them to pay even closer attention, but as quickly as they move, there’s still Twitter and Instagram, even my channel uploads on YouTube.
“Ugh, damn...this isn’t good....” Groaning, I turned away from the counter in front of me and looked at the mounted clock by the door. It was almost time to start the stream, meaning around a half hour beforehand. Great.
Shaking my head, I tightened the grip I had on my soda. It was almost white-knuckle, but that was fine - it was a perfect parallel to my running thoughts right now.
“You have to do it, the mods got it. They can keep it under control. That’s a fact. That’s the fact of the matter.”
“(Y/n), is everything alright?”
Yuri shouting shook me from my stupor - seriously wish I could avoid it - and his footsteps made me turn to the doorway to the living area. “You’ve been in here a while.”
“Ah, yeah - I’m fine. The stream’s gonna start soon, so if you wanted to run through the setup with me, we can do it now,” came an offer from my mouth. Distractions, distractions, I suppose....
“If that would calm you down. You’re starting to strangle that can, there,” he stated - the beverage was beginning to flood the top. He was right, I really needed to loosen my grip.
“Shit! Um, yeah, thanks. Let’s-let’s head up there now, then.”
The two of us trailed beside each other as we walked up the steps, him and I glancing at the other as we did so. Sometimes, though extremely short, we’d look at the photos framed on the wall. Some were even pics with Victor and Yuuri, a few being in Russia despite them living in Japan.
It only took a good thirty seconds to get to my setup and get settled. I gave a general rundown of the console, not like Yuri needed it considering we would play games with each other on both of our off days, but the rundown of the stream came to be a little more difficult.
“So, the waiting screen will pop up....”
A nod and understanding look.
“And a timer will be set up on said screen.”
“Mhm, yeah.”
“When that counts down, I’ll open and introduce myself again, and then you, followed by the game that we’ll be playing.”
“Got it.”
“While waiting, though,” I hesitated. I was going to tell him about the deal with the comments, but on second thought, I probably shouldn’t-
“’While waiting’ what? Is there something else I should be aware of?” came the questioning from the blonde sat in my spare chair.
I cleared my throat, rubbed my hands together, and straightened my back up. “While waiting, comments will come up from the chat. Anything that isn’t permitted on my channel, though, gets deleted and the commenter gets monitored.”
He nodded, staring at me. It seemed almost skeptical.
“So, please try to ignore them as best as you can. The mods have it under control, I promise,” I finished. He straightened his posture, his slightly taller frame engulfing mine in a hug. I tensed up a little bit - this didn’t happen often.
“Got it, darling. Are we ready to start?” He pulled from the hug, gesturing to the setup with his head. I gulped, nodded, turned on some music, and began the stream.
The waiting screen came up, the music in the back ground playing on the video recording, and I finalized the set up. I already spotted a few hate comments pop up, but they were quickly deleted. The mods were really on their game already. Which meant that I had to take the oh-so common deep breath and begin.
After about fifteen minutes of making sure that people were coming in and that we had everything we needed for the stream itself, I turned the music down and the video on.
“Hey, hey, hey, everyone! Sorry about that wait, just had to make sure that everything was ready,” I began, shrugging and trying to match the upbeat demeanor that I tried to maintain for the crowd. “But, today, I have a guest with me! Does anybody know about figure skating? Well, I have my, um -” I choked a little on my words “- my boyfriend, Yuri Plisetsky.”
He popped up on the screen behind me, and I knew now that things were out of my control.
The chat flooded with shock - this was the first time that I had announced that I was dating someone, much less world-renowned figure skater Yuri Plisetsky. This was to be expected. With the shock, though, came the common hate comments.
They came in quicker than usual, and as much as the mods tried to keep them down and deleted, a fair amount were still left as more and more chats came.
‘why is HE with a dumb bitch like HER. he can do so much better.’
‘How much does anyone wanna bet that she bribed him into joining the stream for clout?’
‘desperation can be really awful, huh’
I almost cried, but I choked them back and continued as he introduced himself.
“Well, with that taken care of,” cue the nudge from him as he sat in the seat beside me, “we were gonna play racing games - particularly Mario Kart.”
I skimmed the chat to see some people making exclamations about the games.
“I’ll win. I always do,” Yuri said. It was cocky, which was normal. I laughed, loudly.
“Nope. Remember last time? That was sweet.”
“Hey! You pushed me off the couch and I dropped the controller, cheater!”
And so we began.
Choosing characters, maps, and actually playing rounds upon rounds upon rounds was fun. For a moment, I wasn’t worried about what people were saying as I was so focused on beating him.
It wasn’t until I fell off the ramp right before I was about to turn for the final lap, and landed in 6th place that I noticed the chat.
‘she even sucks at playing this. loser.’
‘DUDE DUMP HER AND GET SOMEONE WHO ISNT SO AWFUL. GET OFF THE INTERNET ALREADY TOO YUO GREASY FREAK’
I could feel my heart start to race. Still, I pushed through. Made my voice higher and more performative, stiffened my shoulders and acted through it.
All the while, Yurio was laughing. It made sense, and I know that this is only a normal occurrence - hell, I do it to him, too - but it left me a little uneasy. There was a sense of almost saccharine familiarity to it, though, and that let me calm down a little bit.
“What the hell are you laughing for, huh? This same thing happened to you last time, big shot.”
“Yeah, sure - I still won,” he snarked. I rolled my eyes and set up for the next round.
The comments continued to flood in as we played more and more rounds, coming close to placing extreme bets just to make sure that either one of us could get the upper hand. We didn’t, but the good side of the chat got a luagh out of that.
All the while, instead of the usual hate comments, they only escalated.
‘you fucking suck, kys now and save the ice tiger the burden.’
‘DIE ALREADY YOU STUPID SLUT!’
‘dont just delete oyur account, delete your loife you fucking clout chaser.’
Tears were gonna come, I knew it. They had never gotten to this point before, and holy shit, did it hurt. It hurt bad. Even worse than usual.
I caved in the middle of the match before deciding to slam Yurio in the side and glare. We both knew what that cue meant, whether or not it was anger or something else.
He almost stared into my soul when he saw my eyes getting glassy. I leaned in to his ear and whispered, “I’m gonna be a few minutes, okay? I’ll be right back. Please let the chat know.”
And with that, I pushed my chair back and shuffled out of the room and back to the bathroom to wear out my panic attack. I didn’t want to know what was being said, but this wasn’t the first time that I had to leave during streams - sometimes it was for a drink or food, others to use the bathroom. Either way, I’m still at a loss - I’m still a target.
I went back in to a semi-silent chat and a Yurio who was scrolling through his phone and checking the chat, responding accordingly. I don’t know if he saw any comments, but whatever - I’m cutting the stream short anyway and handing this off to a friend to edit.
I can’t watch this, but I can tell that there will be some pretty good highlights.
I went to bed that night shaking, after having told Yurio he could crash and sending the saved file to said friend.
Nightmares plagued me that night. Ideas of Yuri leaving me for someone better, fans reaching through the screen and reaching for my neck, even some chasing me down and cornering me enough to point, laugh, and injure me excessively.
It was awful.
It wasn’t until I went to check my Twitter DMs to clear them that something caught my eye.
@(y/n)sbae: @YuriPlisetsky on @y/ngamestreams ‘s stream last night went off on the chat - he already proving the he deserves her.
A video was linked in the tweet itself, and out of curiosity - what did he do when I was out of the room? - I clicked it.
“Okay, (Y/n) is going to be gone for a few minutes. Not like a good portion of you would care, either way.”
Yuri was glaring at the chat that was coming up, even scoffing at some of the messages being sent in.
‘good, the bitch is gone. you deserve better man.’
‘DUMP THE WHORE. DUMP THE WHORE.’
“To every person in the chat having enough time in their sorry lives to torture the woman that I love, I hope you rot. She doesn’t put herself through this hell almost seven days a week just for you lowlifes to put her down even more.
“And if you must say anything, prepare for me to come for your throat. I love her, and I’m not afraid to fall to protect her if need be.
“That said, get a pastime already. If you think she’s pathetic, you losers are leagues worse. Get a hobby, for fucks sake already - sending in comments for no reason other than to send in comments isn’t attractive, like babies like you seem to think you are.”
He got up close to the screen, face almost taking up the whole screen.
“And finally, fuck you.”
He rounded his rant off with two middle fingers.
My eyes went wide, but seeing the rest of the chat cheering him on made me feel much better.
‘Get it, man! fuck you haters!’
‘(your/ship/name) ftw’
‘you two really are meant for each other, it’s so cute!’
‘you two are great inspirations, really - and this is so sweet!’
I didn’t realize it until I saw a drop of liquid on my screen - I was crying. But it wasn’t the kind I was getting used to, no. It was happy tears.
For the first time in a while, the tears I was crying weren’t from pain, or anxiety, or even fear - no. They were happy. And I was actually relieved.
I dropped my phone on the nearest surface and ran to find Yurio, managing to almost trip over my feet and table legs to eventually reach him in the living room. A movie of some kind was playing - I could really care less what it was, my mind is elsewhere - but I dove for the couch and tackled him into a hug.
I was still crying, even getting his clothing wet, but he returned the gesture - albeit in a confused manner, even slightly worried.
“What is this about, babe? Is something wrong?” Panic was laced in his tone, of course, but I broke away to look him in the eyes (as best as I could considering I was still sobbing).
“Nothing’s wrong, Yuri. I just saw what you did on the stream last night when I was out,” I sputtered through deep breaths and sniffles. It was hard to talk, honestly, but he got the message.
“Why didn’t you tell me about that? I could have handled it earlier, y’know?” The question was blunt, but I could tell that he was preoccupied with the comments. I shuffled around and laid on his chest before taking a deep breath and calming down a little.
“Gee, thanks - but if you really want to know, I didn’t want to worry you. They weren’t bad in the beginning, but after a couple months ago, they got so much worse....”
He sighed, putting a hand on my head and patting it gently. “Really, this could have been shut down, or I could have helped you...you really scared me, (Y/n).”
I curled into him more, smiling into his chest. “But you shut it down, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, yeah - now get some rest, okay? I’ve got some games that I want to play on stream with you again tonight.”
BONUS
The next day, after the stream had gone by (nearly) without a hitch and Twitter was updated accordingly - simply for the purpose of officially announcing that Yuri and I were dating and providing updates regarding the next upload.
Otherwise, it had taken some time for the aftermath to completely come to an end. The comments had come to an end, at least as best as they could, and it was later brought to my attention from yet another intriguing tag on a private account that I knew through Yuri.
@russianiceprince12: you’re very welcome @y/ngamestreams & @icetigerofrussia for the warning
Of course, Victor put him to the test. Why am I not surprised?
