Shunk Dunkey

[taintthesaint]

THE SEAL OF SOLOMON HAS BEEN BROKEN! DEMONS NOW SPEAK DIRECTLY WITH US!!! NO ONE IS SAFE!!!!

(Me wiping cause I gotta shove the the wipe into my butthole a little bit to get all the way clean)

[taintthesaint]

The British variant of Mr. Mime is just Ringo Starr.

[taintthesaint]

Me explaining sneezing to a space alien:

It’s aaaaaaaah nutting out of your face. You guys cum, right?

[taintthesaint]

Showers without bathtubs are just giant urinals you can also wash your body in.

[taintthesaint]

You can lead a horse to water, but sometimes you just gotta drown it.

(not mine, don’t know where it came from.)

[taintthesaint]

Gatorade is an affront to the Lord our God.

God gave us a perfect hydration source. When purified, fills out every hydration need. Beautiful and clear; both essential and refreshing.

Then He made us, and we’re like…”lol it’s alright, I guess. It’s not even flavored or nothin though. I think we can do better, we got it from here thanks.” and it’s more hydrating than water.

This is not a shill for Gatorade, I’m saying the entire state of Florida is gonna have some serious questions to answer at them Pearly Gates other than the ones they would naturally occur as a Floridian.

[taintthesaint]

My uncle used to know an ol boy who used to keep rain boots in the back of his pickup truck in case he found a wild goat he’d try to lure ‘em in with chocolate and get their back legs in there with his so they couldn’t get away when he was bangin em.

[taintthesaint]

Said this shit to my wife the other night and my old man heard and said “Steve Thibideau…weird feller.”

[taintthesaint]

My uncle used to know an ol boy who used to keep rain boots in the back of his pickup truck in case he found a wild goat he’d try to lure ‘em in with chocolate and get their back legs in there with his so they couldn’t get away when he was bangin em.

[taintthesaint]

Stepping out to rip another Pippi Longstocking. BRB, y’all.

[taintthesaint]

Hey y’all, if you’re celebrating the Charlie Kirk shit, go ahead and unfollow me. I ain’t never voted republican but some of y’all are fuckin wilding out. That was a whole fuckin dude with two kids. Them kids gotta grow up without a daddy now. We don’t merc motherfuckers for having different opinions than us. Naw, I didn’t like his ass either. I woulda cussed him out if given the chance. None of that matters now though. Y’all show some respect for the dead now. If you’re incapable of that, go fuck yourself.

[taintthesaint]

Serendipity-doo-dah

Serendipity day

[taintthesaint]

I am greasy, I am overcaffeinated, and I would like to be friends. Open the door.

[taintthesaint]

These winds of change can fucking blow me.

[taintthesaint]

*pronounces “Onahole” like “guacamole”*

[taintthesaint]

Guy Futanari

[taintthesaint]

Anything can be port-o-potty if you shit in it and then take it somewhere else.

[taintthesaint]

Y’all listen it is imperative for y’all to understand:

1. This is an 18+ blog. I do not condone minors seeing shit I post.

2. I’m running outa space on my phone and I gotta dump some memes for me to keep later, so enjoy if you want, don’t if you don’t.

Let’s go.

[taintthesaint]

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