I’m a little wine tipsy and I felt like writing.
I’m some colour of queer and I’m also Christian, but I don’t know if I should call myself a Christian anymore. The more I look into the Bible, the less credit I give it. It’s amazing that we have a book of such antiquity so readily available to us and there’s a lot of great knowledge and history there. But I have to ask, why are we giving it as much credit as we do? It was written by humans, and even if one argues that God wrote these words by controlling the hands of the authors, so much transcription and translation has occurred throughout the years and I don’t know if I can, in good conscience, assert that there is no error there. I know it would be so neat and tidy if we were to be given this rulebook where everything is black and white and clear as crystal but I don’t believe that’s what the Bible gives us. It gives us history and a look into the lives of the forefathers of our faith and how people’s experiences with Jesus changed their lives. How immensely reductive would it be to assume that we, the whites of the North American Christian church, have it all right all the time? That we have the correct translation, the correct interpretation, the correct set of morals? If God is real, wouldn’t He be so much bigger, so much more all-encompassing, so much more reachable? Adding queer issues into this complicates things so much more. I constantly worry whether or not I am simply following my feelings (and as we know, the heart is deceitful above all things) and I throw myself from one interpretation of the text to the next; I cling dearly to the Holy Spirit and hope I’m right but worry dreadfully that I may be wrong. I believe in God, and that’s why I don’t want to call myself a Christian anymore. I can’t say that I believe in the Bible as the inerrant word of God. I believe in His love, the fruits of His Spirit, His kindness, His plan. But I’m not so sure I believe in the Bible.