devils in the backseat

𝙲𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚜 tanner || 27 || surgical resident

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: peanut!

lena: shut up, i was trying to be fair and smash names together

lena: I AM NOT CREATIVE I KNOW. you do better. i dare you.

tan: L

tan: O

tan: P

tan: E

tan: N

tan: T

tan: I

tan: N

tan: E

[tannerxvalentine]

imessage || tan man 😜

nova: literally rolling my eyes at you rn

nova: i did yeah a little bit anyways

nova: good just so we're on the same page

nova: oh my god tanner... no i'm not jealous. i don't even think i called you daddy ever so your point is invalid

nova: it's just what?? come on don't shut me out

tan: dont roll them too hard or they will get stuck like that

tan: aww you still love me, novabear. cute.

tan: ....shit that wasn't you. that was uh never mind.

tan: i dont know how to be one.

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: oh my god.

lena: the baby is so tiny.

lena: can we smash the last names together? valentez? lopentine?

tan: yupp

tan: like a peanut

tan: lopentine sounds like a knock off brand of fruit loops.

tan: hey kids dont forget to eat your lopentines before you leave for schoool today!

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: TANNER IS THERE A SONOGRAM OR NOT.

lena: YOU BETTER FUCKING ANSWER ME

tan: -insert picture-

tan: Meet baby Valentine. If it gets my last name.

[tannerxvalentine]

imessage || tan man 😜

nova: imma slap you if you keep calling me grandma...

nova: maybe i shouldn't have texted you

nova: rolling my eyes at you as i type just so you know

nova: of course you did was the rest of the women population not enough?

nova: sorry that was rude..

nova: i mean you have the right to be babe.. but i'm sure you're not the only one who's scare.

tan: sorry, nana.

tan: but you missed me and you know it.

tan: i exepct nothing less

tan: okay, im suspecting there is a bit of jealous there. are you jealous, super nova? do you miss calling me daddy?

tan: yeah i know. its just...yeah.

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: hehehe. even then i had the upper hand. ha!

lena: what picture?

lena: tanner matthews valentine, did you see a sonogram?

lena: what the fuck, why didn't you tell me there was a sonogram. i wanna see baby!

tan: you sound like mom right now.

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: speak for yourself kiddo--i was a curious kindergartener. well, according to mom.

lena: what? you asked! and, uhm, did you know we're more likely to have a set of twins because we are twins?

lena: are you having twins?

tan: you know what i actually remember that! i think mom said i cried because you wouldn't share it.

tan: oh god i hope we aren't the picture only shows one...what if one is hiding behind the other?

[tannerxvalentine]

imessage || tan man 😜

nova: hi hope you remember me

nova: just making sure you're alive

nova: you know because i fell like you just disappeared off the earth

nova: or avoiding me

nova: oh and thanks for telling me about you becoming and actually daddy

tan: who is this? wait grandma? did you get a new phone? well tickle me pink.

tan: nah im dead, thanks though.

tan: now you know im not avoiding you, grandma. im just a busy man doing doctor tihngs that my friend nova can't comprehend.

tan: welcome, like i needed more people to call me daddy but hey it happens.

tan: though im still scared shitless, gran.

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: sometimes, if they want attention. or are just weird.

lena: shut the fuck up. i have great idea a lot of times.

lena: yes i do. believe it or not i have some experience in that department.

tan: i mean we are weird but we never ate paste....

tan: HA

tan: OH GOD LENa

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: they are cute--just not when they ask about BDE. or eat paste.

lena: i have those sometimes, y'know? lol

lena: do you know what BDE is?

tan: they still eat paste at that age!?

tan: very very rarely.

tan: do you?

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: i know, i know. you get to save lives and i get to answer questions about dicks for 8 hours. how did my life come to this?

lena: 1) i can't answer that because, uh, morality and legality.

lena: 2) i am not telling you. ask alessa or nova. they could probably give you a, uhm, more /accurate/ answer. lol

tan: i went to school longer? i dont fucking know, youre the one who thought kids were cute

tan: good idea

tan: i doubt they know what BDE is even

[tannerxvalentine]

alessandrcxlopez:

“don’t make me fight you.” she said her tone very teasing as she looked over at tanner a smile on her lips. she knew they were still learning from all of this. shaking her head she reached out to grab a piece of pizza taking a bite into it, “don’t say sorry, we were both in a moment. we did this together.” she said covering her mouth as she talked. she again shook her head, “you don’t deserve it please don’t think you do.” she said looking over at him before sitting up quickly getting up from her spot to go through a folder on the table, “before i forget.” she said walking back over and handing over the small sonogram picture, “this is yours.” 

“kinky,” he said a wink taking a slice after her and immediately taking a bite risking burning his tongue with the hot melting cheese. “true,” unlike her he didn’t cover his mouth, “though i did enjoy the process of it if that helps.” at her next comment he simply shrugged his shoulders and brushed it off. that was for another day. “wait,” setting the slice of pizza down he took the picture in his hand and stared at it with wide eyes. “holy shit...”

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: you called her when you were /half asleep/? TANNER you cannot call our mom when you're half asleep to tell her you're about to be a father.

lena: 11. its was great because apparently i was the expert on the topic, and each of the boys kept asking me if they had BDE. all 12 of them. do i give some weird vibe that says "ask me if you have BDE, i am an expert"?

tan: LOOK I HAVE BEEN AT THE HOSPITAL A LOT LATELY OKAY?

tan: well did they have BDE?

tan: do i?

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: did you expect anything different? but some of it was happy right? i mean, she's gonna be a grandma!

lena: alive and kickin', like always. some kids started talking about big dick energy in class today so that was fun.

tan: no but still i wasn't fully awake yet. she was stoked but also yellin at me for being stupid.

tan: oh god. how old are they again?

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

lena: so i take it you told her about the baby?

lena: also, hi, hello, how are you?

tan: there was lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of screaming. im still deaf in that ear

tan: hey loser. good, you?

[tannerxvalentine]

text ➡️ my other half

tan: hey so mom is coming in a few weeks, heads up.

[tannerxvalentine]

ohwellmaxwell:

max shook his head waiting till tanner had taken the amount of fries he wanted letting out a soft sigh, “well for one congrats, and two i mean no actual person could process it in the however long you’ve known.. i mean i know i would be in the same spot you’re in..”

smirking at him he let out a small wink as he munched on the fries he took. “thanks then i guess. it’s my sisters best friend, so you can imagine lena’s reaction...i told my mom last night. im still deaf from all the screaming she did at me over the phone. excitement and telling me i was fucking stupid.”