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why do people always praise kids that sound or act way more mature than they should at their age or kids that understand/take on the responsibilities that a “grown-up” would do or kids that already start intensively planning for their future or kids that take extensive care of a family member/acts as their emotional support showing that they’re “no regular kid” and “the most caring” and “very mature”

kids don’t do that

kids shouldn’t be doing that

why would a kid need to be saying and doing those things in the first place

alexwinters

you know what? I was planning on deleting this post as soon as I posted it like I do with a bunch of my other posts but no screw that I’m reblogging this because I want more people to stop looking at this behaviour with rose-tinted glasses and instead start questioning what those children are going through and what kind of pressures are being put on them at such a young age for them to be thinking or acting this way without them even realising it yet which can lead to many problems in their futures when they should actually be thinking about what pokemons they’re gonna be finding and catching on their way to school… not going through feelings of worry, pressure, guilt, and overbearing responsibility

protect these children and let them be the kids they deserve to be

hajisiw4

i love and agree to this so much bless u

a-semicomplete-synthesis

It’s at least not a bad thing to think about your future from a young age, and even to have it be your focus. I’d say it’s useful to mature early and I wish I was more focused on it when I was younger.

alexwinters

Yes, it’s not that bad of a thing to start thinking of your future from a young age and having a little bit of a more mature mindset sometimes, but when I wrote this post I was aiming for the kind of kids that start intensively planning for their futures because they don’t want to end up like their parents or/and they want to leave their house as soon as they can or they think that they need to be an adult right away and completely forget about how old they are. Yes, planning ahead is very good and important, but relying on it as a means of escape is what makes it a problem.

legallynonbinary

There is a term for what you’ve described here, and it’s called parentification, and it’s a form of child abuse.

furiousgoldfish

Don’t be afraid to use strong words when describing your abuse

If your abusers gaslighted you and forced you to act like everything is normal, and you weren’t allowed to imply with any of your words and actions that something is wrong, this is torture. You’re a torture victim.

If your abusers convinced you that your life is worthless and that you have to work for them if you want to live, forced you into physical labour they never appreciated or rewarded, and kept you living in severe poverty even though they had more money than they needed, this is slavery. Being brainwashed and coerced into physical labor while only getting enough resources to keep yourself alive is defined as slavery. You’re a person who survived slavery.

If your abusers kept you living in fear for your life, it’s torture.

If your abusers changed their behaviour from cruel to kind constantly to keep you confused and attached to them, this is psychological brainwashing. They took not only your mental health but your perception of kindness and cruelty. This is destructive type of torture and trauma bonding, also done to torture victims.

If your abusers isolated you and made sure you don’t accept information other than what they give you (for instance, by convincing you that all other information is fake and you should reject it unless you want to be punished) and they acted as if they had valid and strong reasons to hurt you, this is cult. You were brainwashed and mentally tortured within a cult.

If you were abused emotionally so bad you often wished they used knives instead of words so you could at least show injuries for it and prove you have been hurt, you were tortured. Wishing the abuse was physical and worse than it was just so you could prove it is a sign of a tortured person.

If you were touched in a way that felt wrong, if you were exposed to sexual content without even knowing what it is, if you were touch starved and then had inappropriate and harmful touch offered to you as the only way you deserve to be touched, if you’ve been accepting it because you still really needed touch, if you accepted abuse because there was no other way for you to survive, you were sexually abused, blackmailed and heavily psychologically abused so you wouldn’t fight back. You were tortured. You didn’t have any control over what was happening to you. You had no way to opt out.

If you were treated as a burden, like your life is worthless, if you felt that if you die nobody would care, if you felt like there’s no value to you and no importance to your existence, if you felt like it was your fault your life is being thrown away, you were cut off from your own sense of humanity, your own view of yourself as a human was taken away from you, you were rejected by the human race and isolated from the community, you were left on your own, as if you’ve done something terrible to deserve being outcasted and banished. This is psychological destruction. They destroyed your humanity in your own eyes, they destroyed you from inside out. Humans need to be a part of something, always.

Do not downplay your agony. Do not minimize their crimes. Your symptoms are telling the truth. Your panic and pain and anger are telling the truth. You didn’t overreact. You didn’t take it wrong. You reacted normally to cruelty and inhuman behaviour. You went through real hell. You didn’t imagine any of it. If you were forced to participate, needed something out of it - it means you were abused even worse, not that any of it was your fault. You don’t have to protect anyone from what was done to you. Your pain is not a burden to anyone. You are the one carrying it. You are the one experiencing consequences of everything done to you. You have the right to a voice. You have the right to hold abusers accountable. You have the right to say just how bad it was.

#abuse #sexual abuse #torture

sheldony

blackfemmejeanvaljean

big mood

#suicide

blasphemies-deactivated20130101

deepinthesewoods-deactivated201

bryantmcgill

“You are your own essential ally. Get right with yourself.” — Bryant McGill

fomysquad

Eric Garner’s murderers are where? Free. If this isn’t an example of this racist white supremacy I don’t no what is!

#EricGarner #BlackLivesMatter #Justice #PoliceBrutality

#StayWoke

wnq-writers

I look outside, I see all the cars on the road, all the people passing by. Despite all the pain, all the loss, all the hurt; the world moves on. The Earth continues to turn, as if you were still with me. As if I turned around, you’d still be there.

Saad Rashid (via wnq-writers)

respect-the-flow

White people, no one is asking you to apologize for your ancestors. We are asking you to dismantle the systems they built and you maintain and benefit from.

#i'm white #white supremacy #ancestors

spookihope

whenever i’m talking to someone and they tell me about something that happened to them i always tell them about something that happened to me that’s similar to what happened to them. i do it as kind of a “oh hey yeah this happened to me so i can relate to what you’re going through” but i’m always afraid it comes out as “oh yeah well this happened to me so clearly i have it tougher than you” or “i’m done talking about you let’s talk about me”

i swear i don’t mean it like that……..

drabblemeister

I run into this a lot with my job - so instead of telling the whole story I say something like, “Oh my gosh, I had something REALLY similar happen. What did you do after that??” And I’ve found that works. Usually they explain and then ask, “So what happened to you?” And then you’re invited to share, and the formula for conversing continues on. :)

baby-andromedan-deactivated2016

of all the tumblr posts i’ve read, this one is going to change my life the fastest lol.

fatfeistyandfashionable

Thanks to both the OP for posting a thing that so many of us do, and the responder who gave us a better way to do it. You’re doing the lord’s work, my friend!

taryn-rootrot-blog

something i definitely do and am trying to figure out better ways...sometimes the most simple things are the most helpful.

gentlechamomile

10 Things You Should Know About Mars Retrograde in Scorpio

lanimalrawr

So very accurate. The last four years have been the hardest years of my life. From therapy, diagnoses, denial, grief, depression, isolation, you name it I went thru it. However, I kept pushing and pushing because I KNEW I had to. I have a purpose on earth and I will achieve it no matter what. I have survived. I am the phoenix.

lespritcurieux

This post has had me thinking for the past few days, I’ve thought about everything that’s happened in my life in those 4 years, good and bad and everything in between, and honestly I am so grateful for all the blessings and all the lessons. I’m sure that many things have yet to come my way and that I’ve yet to grow in many aspects, I’m still scared but learning how to let go of everything that holds me back, I am where I need to be at the moment, and I will keep on moving to wherever I need to be.

taryn-rootrot-blog

this makes my heart sing! these last four years i lost everything. i became a shell. i found every part of my body and heart rebelling against what my brain told me i should be doing, often rebelling in harmful ways. i kept being in a toxic relationship, i kept having my heart broken by different people but in similar ways outside of that relationship. i kept doing what i knew hurt me, kept spinning out into the same cycles. i kept my heart closed but couldn’t say no...so i seemed open and free on the surface. but increasingly, even though things are still so hard and exhausting...i have found my true path. i am still the fool - so much to learn, so much to let go of & transform. but i have survived. every curse thrown at me has only made me stronger, braver, more expressive, has only led to more beauty & love in my little life. i am not who i thought i would be, but i have peace, i have dreams, i have my words and voice again. i don’t always feel this hopeful of course, but there’s something louder and wiser inside of me that can drown out all the cruelty that i can wield toward myself. soon i will be taking a retreat by myself and i hope to find even more clarity on where to move next, and how.

#brittany josephina #astrology #mars in scorpio #changes #processing

indomitableme

I get feelings of total defeat. I get feelings of total nihilism. I get so depressed sometimes that I look at my hands and I think why even lift them off the table…why turn on the computer…why touch the keys…why write anything? But what I do then is write about that. If nothing else, I turn it on and I write about despair, and I try to write my way through it. I think the most important thing, more than anything in the world, is to write, and use any excuse in your mind that you can to write. Don’t ever let despair or depression stop you. Remember this, that if you don’t write it, it isn’t going to be there. It’s that simple. And, if you are really down and out and really sad, look at it this way–decide that you are going to write it, and if you don’t like it, you are going to throw it away. I’ve done that quite a few times, and I’ve never wound up throwing the book away.

Anne Rice (via digital-femme)

“everyone eventually becomes their parents” is not deep and profound it’s terrifying and it’s bullshit and abuse survivors dont need to hear that shit thank you

#abuse #breaking cycles

celestialsophrosyne

*TW Shadow Work Tarot Spread

Shadow work requires love and patience as it can be extremely stressful if you’re not prepared to face dark truths. Before starting, ground yourself and have a loving and accepting attitude towards yourself even when you see something you don’t like. This spread is to help you find strengths in the darkness.

If you will be interrupted, are feeling imbalanced, have low energy, are busy, and/or cannot handle intense emotions/memories at the moment then save this for another time. I suggest doing this only once a week or even bimonthly at the most to really reflect.

1. What is it about my _____ that I need to work on?

Pull 1 card.

If you lack direction or are overwhelmed then pull two cards. The first card is the topic, the second card is what you need to work on regarding the topic.

Example topics: ego, greed, spirit, love life, social life, attitude, childhood, trauma, fears, addiction, guilt, scars, destructive nature, happiness, appearance, point of view, self esteem, leadership skills, possessiveness, communication, past, health, search for answers, awkwardness, illness, shadow relationship. *This spread is not a replacement for professional mental health.

2. Where does the problem stem from?

Pull 1 to 3 cards. If one card doesn’t explain enough pull more cards.

3. How do I overcome this?

Pull 1 to 3 cards, same as above.

4. What is the lesson I need to take from this?

Pull 1 card to concentrate on the focal point of the lesson.

5-7. What is an unknown factor about this topic that I’ve yet to realize?

Pull 3 cards. Since this is “unknown”, you’ll have to get a bigger picture. This may trigger memories or uncomfortable realizations depending on the topic.

8. What should I do about it?

Pull 1 to 3 cards, same as question 2.

9. What affirmation can I say to get through this?

Pull 1 card.

Think of something short and simple to remember even if they’re just a few key words. If nothing comes to mind immediately, give yourself the space to contemplate as you soak in all this new information.

Notes

Make bullet points to focus on and what you need to remember and do.

Maybe have a journal/tag to track your thoughts and revelations.

Find a friend you can talk to if you need someone.

#tarot #tarot spreads #magic