Karwai Kaveri

a non binary with an empty brain waiting to be filled with poems and lame jokes

[taztukk]

#voiddeck #badart #sharks #familyjourney #lifedeath

If you understand this short clip, 😂🦈😭

[writingdose]

[stoicbreviary]

“Consider the fact that, in a few years, I shall be dead. This fact can seem depressing. But the reality is only this. After a certain time, none of the thoughts and experiences that occur will be directly causally related to this brain, or be connected in certain ways to these present experiences. That is all this fact involves. And, in that description, my death seems to disappear.”

— Derek Parfit, “The Unimportance of Identity”, Identity: Essays Based on Herbert Spencer Lectures (via philosophybits)

[patronsaintofweepingmothers]

"JIJI TIRED" (2007), GRIMILDE GRIMM

[doberbutts]

I have a neighbor in her late 80s who I have lived next to for the past 4 years since I bought this house, that I have to re-introduce myself to every time she spots me outside. She remembers that I am her neighbor but cannot remember my name (unless she's talking to my partner, in which case she does remember my name but not his).

She has a truly ancient tiny dog whose pastimes include shitting on my driveway and picking fence fights with Fenris. Occasionally she will ask me to do his nails and he's actually wonderful for them so it takes like 3 minutes tops. She also will usually hand me whatever bill she has in her wallet for it- sometimes it's a 1, once it was a 50, usually it's like 5 bucks.

Now I have tried refusing her money and even gave the 50 back and wouldn't accept it. I then came home to the $50 bill taped to my back door the next day after work. So, you know, I'm kind of stuck accepting whatever she tries to give me because she WILL tape the money to my house somewhere otherwise.

(Once she gave one of her granddaughters a gift that required batteries and was distraught that it didn't come with any. Knocked on my door to ask if I had any. I haven't used my spare batteries in ages so I just gave her a whole pack. Refused to let her pay for them. Three days later a pack of batteries plus ten bucks was taped to my door. So this is not an uncommon occurance.)

Anyway this time she didn't have any money to pay because we're all fucking broke as shit on this block and she was really upset because his nails were starting to curl and once again I did them in like 3 minutes and when she apologized for not being able to pay me I just waved her off and told her not to worry about it.

I came home on Monday to my backyard being totally cleared of winter debris and the growing collection of winter dog shit as well as my fence repaired in two of the places that broke when the tree fell on it. I texted her adult son whose number I have and he confirmed he did it because he was happy that I helped his mom out with her dog. I tried to explain that it really does not take a lot to do the dog's nails but he similarly refused to hear it and said he'd be back in a few days to finish fixing the fence.

Idk why I thought he would be different from his mother. But I guess I get free fence repairs for the price of doing an old lady's dog's nails once every couple weeks to months.

[taztukk]

Funnily. , it's about 20 days from now till what could have been 1 year. I guess some things , it's better left unsaid

[from-thedeskof]

I still wondered in those pre-dawn hours—perhaps it was still begging—if love would please, please leave me. 

I was no hopeless romantic in life but had found love easily, and given it just as cleanly. He was no different, of course, the love I had for him came to me as neatly and clearly as the sun I’d see in a few hours. He was the sun. I was blinded by him, fully and totally. Each dawn as exciting as renewing and warm as the one prior. I reveled in warmth of him, the brightness of his mind, exposing every inch of me given over to that consuming glow. 

Until, little by little, that atmospheric shield of easy loving began to decay. I started to feel the intense radioactivity of the sun. How it burned deep under the dermis until all of my skin began to itch and damage the cells so completely that all tenderness was lost. How it created permanent damage, borne out at the cellular level, a breeding ground for a cancer that would begin to quietly rot all that was once good.

Yet even when the sun shuttered and its light and heat disappeared on a Tuesday evening, I still felt the burn. There was no relief from the aftereffects of his radiation. 

I begged then, as I do now, in these pre-dawn hours, if love would, please, please leave me. 

[catchymemes]

[amazoogle]

if tumblr shuts down you can find me on tumblr. ill still be here. they cant make me leave

[taztukk]

I hope you are safe and sound amid everything ongoing. I know less than I know since we become strangers but never a late night , you have not been in my thoughts.

Every passing day a testament of what could have been, stay strong they said but i rather stay soft.

Empty words of knowledge that cannot be applied for I am none any wiser to apply it. I know the theories , I know what to do, but I'm not wise enough to apply it.

Should time heal all wounds, let it heal yours and mine. For ours was never a folly, more of a history lost in time.

[bhronzed]

[taztukk]

Today was particularly sad because I don't know how to feel.

Not anymore. Not with letting everything go for the past to be in the past.

So grateful for the life I had, but yet , it has always been creeping me up on me.

The thought, the idea.

[catchymemes]

[yoshidinosaur]

Today, I laid my first egg. It hurt a little but it was over quick. I am excited to have a baby sister!

[yoshidinosaur]

I made a big mistake. I threw the egg. The egg went really far, and it was really fast. I don't know why I threw the egg. I'm really sad.

[krystal-prisms]

Every time there's major political and current events shit going on (largely in America) we get a new Hunger Games and a new Knives Out and I just want to personally thank Suzanne Collins and Rian Johnson for this

[keepscrollinghun]

[willabee]

SHE'S TEN YEARS OLD TODAY 🎂