..inescapable wanderlust..

http://teeeeeee-jay.tumblr.com/sayhellototiffany

[an-inarticulate-senseofsuburbia]

What carved me into the Bitch I am today

[diigiitalviisiions]

The last one

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

You’ll likely end up disappointed if you think people will care for you the way you care for them. Not everybody has your heart.

def learned this the hard way (via kristennjade)

[awwww-cute]

I took my dog to the groomer earlier, I’m not even sure I got the right dog back

[teeeeeee-jay]

radio: doh

me: not again

radio: doh doh doh, doh doh doh

me: this is the 73rd time today

radio: doh doh doh, doh doh doh

me: THIS HIT THAT ICE COLD MICHELLE PFEIFFER THAT WHITE GOLD

[mrdestructo]

I’m opening ‘50 Shades of Grey’ to a random page and posting what I find. Part four.

Christian Grey stood on top of the end of the bed, shirtless, hands on his hips, wearing really good pants that he got at the millionaire pants store.

"Dong," he said. "Dong. Dong. Dong. Dong. Dong. Dong."

"What’s that?" said the girl, aware in some girl way that she was about to sex more than she ever had before.

"Open up," he said, unzipping. "That’s the fuck doorbell."

[firstjumperonfire]

I’m honestly not sure if this is a joke or if it’s actually from the book

[miss-america-is-dreaming-deacti]

Hi I’m playing a woman receiving a dick pic and I’ll be singing “put that thing back where it came from or so help me” from Monsters Inc

[fyeahmainer]

That’s it, this one wins

[as-seenon-tv]

TODAY I WAS RUNNING AND THIS MINIVAN DROVE PAST ME AND SOME LIKE 14 YEAR OLD BOY YELLED OUT THE WINDOW SOMETHING LIKE “RUN FAT ASS” AND HIS MOTHER TURNED THE CAR AROUND AND MADE HIM RUN LIKE 5 BLOCKS WITH ME WHILE SHE DROVE NEXT TO US I ALMOST SLIPPED FROM LAUGHING SO HARD

[susiethemoderator]

Vaccinate your kids folks

I’m not about to get sick and die because you think juniper leaf with organic honey will protect you from Polio

[bedroomfloor-deactivated2013050]

[y2kid]

i will do a lot of things but admitting im cold to my mum who told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them

[intoaquietworld]

Mamrie’s Abbie impression was spot on

[adamsdriver]

but do you ever think about the fact that thor wasn’t even considered for the avengers team, he just showed up to the party and everyone went along with it

[justalilblondemama-deactivated2]

Accidental personal injuries are absolutely the worst. “Oh, how did you do that?” “Well, frankly, I’m an idiot.”

[teeeeeee-jay]

this website is full of 16-year-old children who take themselves very, very seriously and 20-somethings who cannot navigate adulthood if their lives depended on it 

[softwaring]

[thecutestofthecute]

Arlo the Australian Shepherd

[englishmajorloser]

You are enough. You are so enough, it is unbelievable how enough you are.

Sierra Boggess (via jazzandcats)