prehistoric @terribleclxw - Tumblr Blog

----hey.

#ooc #is me #trying and failing miserably to focus on one damn thing

Watch your head, there’s something in the trees! What is this creature with a long gripping tail and strange hands? It’s Simiraptor pithicomimus!

Here’s some sneak peaks of my contribution to the Almost Real Zine on Kickstarter. I made some funky theropods with a prehensile tail for a fictional post-cretaceous Mesozoic with a lot of angiosperm trees for them to live in. I made 4 full pages of illustrations for these guys and we have just a bit over 24 hours to reach our funding goal so now’s our last calls!

#;aes #;mars

thegremlincat

Quick sketch from this morning. might actually finish this up soon-is, had fun with it!

#;aes #one of rizzos packmates

usik-paleo-illust

Velociraptor

#(musings);Rizzo

Two distracted look-a-like humans? Easy prey more like.

#ic:chauncey #chomp chomp #dash comm

littlelovelymemes

( * &. – MORE POPULAR TEXT POSTS.

‘ i’m a snack but everyone seems to be on a diet. ’ ‘ i’m gonna replace every bone in my body with a knife, if someone punches me they’re in for a surprise (the knife) ’ ‘ let me just flirt with you and be a brat and send you cute half nudes. ’ ‘ blue-flavored candy is always the best flavor of candy like what the fuck. blue raspberries aren’t even a thing. we are literally eating the color blue as a flavor and it’s fucking magical. ’ ‘ touch id is pissing me off. ‘try again’ the fuck? it’s me with a lil chicken grease. ’ ‘ call me in the middle of the night and tell me you can’t sleep without me. ’ ‘ healthy relationships with fathers? sounds fake. ’ ‘ me to my alarm in the morning: i was literally sleeping but go off i guess. ’ ‘ do i blame my zodiac sign or my childhood traumas or both ’ ‘ *eating microwaved ramen noodles and watching kitchen nightmares* i cannot believe this asshole didn’t use fresh chicken in his paella, unbelievable. ’ ‘ my specialty: the accidental 12 hour nap in broad daylight ’ ‘ quiet little moans while making out is the hottest thing ever ’ ‘ date somebody who will go on a road trip with you to see america’s 10 most haunted places ’ ‘ any vampires who need permission to enter my house…. you have my permission… you wanna come through my window in a flurry of fog and wind? you can do that… wanna drink my blood and take me away to your big vampire castle? alright friend, go for it ’ ‘ i’m the guy from the lady and the tramp who gives stray dogs pasta and stands in an alleyway playing an accordion for them ’ ‘ *nervously calls crush bro* ’ ‘ i don’t have trust issues. i have ‘seen that shit happen before my own eyes’ issues. ’ ‘ fuck summer. i want it to be dark and misty and frigid and october. ’ ‘ concept: we are holding each other in bed, we look at each other and know that all that waiting all that distance was worth it to be close now ’ ‘ i’m so lucky to have gotten to watch you grow so much this past year. i’m so proud of you. ’ ‘ i’m so protective of me now, i’ll cut somebody off for simply having the wrong energy ’ ‘ why are you trying to make me horny. bitch, you know i’m making macaroni. ’ ‘ date a boy who curls up on your lap, even though he is 6’2" because he loves cuddles ’ ‘ going out on a date is cool and all; but what about simply sharing a bed with someone, listening to music and discovering everything about one another, together. ’ ‘ we are drunk and i ended up sitting on the bathroom counter with my legs wrapped around you, but when i wrote ‘marry me’ on your hand with a sharpie, i wasn’t joking. ’ ‘ you’re equivalent to my favorite color. you’re the human version of what is safe. ’ ‘ one of the most toxic things i’ve ever done is ignore the bad in someone because i love them. ’ ‘ you think you want me to shut up? i have to listen to myself even when i’m not talking ’ ‘ why would i fuck a demon? simple, the status. imagine rolling up into hell already havin had your back blown out by one of their own. imagine you and a gang of other losers standin at the gates of hell, they’re all crying, scared to death about having a pitchfork up their ass for eternity and you just walk into the arms of your sugar demon? legendary. ’ ‘ i like wearing your clothes. they smell like you and your scent is home to me. ’ ‘ *therapist voice* you are stupid and gay. ’ ‘ i like to blame myself for everything just in case. ’ ‘ the realist thing you can do for me is keep your word. ’ ‘ love yourself enough to set boundaries. your time and energy are precious. ’ ‘ i haven’t done anything but i sure could use a break. ’ ‘ sometimes you just need to hear how much you mean to someone. ’ ‘ who needs april fools. my entire life is a joke. ’ ‘ i wish i could be near you, my heart misses you. ’ ‘ i’m not trying my hardest but i’m very tired which i think should be taken into consideration. ’ ‘ me @ me: don’t start buddy don’t you dare. ’ ‘ so what’s next? you heal. you grow. and you help others. ’ ‘ my kink is not setting an alarm for the next morning. ’ ‘ if you think i’m cute send me money. ’ ‘ one day i will take a good selfie and you will be sorry….. you will all be sorry. ’ ‘ not a day passes where i don’t embarrass myself but it’s ok because i’m on the path to destroy my ego so i won’t be embarrassed anymore. ’ ‘ there is no reason not to love with you whole heart. ’ ‘ i hope your heart heals from all the damage it took over the years. ’ ‘ sometimes you just gotta say fuck it and send that text. ’ ‘ ‘i can see your nipples through that shirt’ first of all stop being ungrateful. ’ ‘ so much is going on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s too much!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just want to sleep in the forest for 190 years!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i’m tired leave me alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ’ ‘ i heard you like bad girls. well i’m bad….. at everything. ’ ‘ yes, i am fully aware that I’m The Worst™ but i still wanna be like……. loved and stuff. ’ ‘ i really am, from the bottom of my heart, an actual fucking idiot. ’ ‘ let me show you just how good i can be. ’ ‘ i’m just tryna chill on a beach somewhere at 3 am. ’ ‘ i have a serious weakness for thigh grabbing and hickeys. ’ ‘ i’m a snail and god is salting me. ’ ‘ i hate texting people who don’t use a billion emojis and a trillion exclamation points in their messages. just say you hate me and want me to die. ’ ‘ being called baby?????? holding hands????!? being KISSED?!!!?!??????? ’ ‘ i hope your heart heals from all the damage it took over the years. ’ ‘ my heart busts a nut every time someone tells me they saw something and they thought of me. ’ ‘ i have hella heart eyes for you. ’ ‘ you’re cute. i wanna kiss you for a whole hour. ’ ‘ it’s pretty iconic to like yourself. ’ ‘ i am so jealous of animals that get to hibernate, like what the fuck, why can’t i just sleep for four months and then return to real life. ’ ‘ stop feeling sad and acting weird you bitch (the bitch is me) ’ ‘ i’m still obsessed with you like it’s day one. ’ ‘ to quote hamlet act iii scene iii line 92, ‘no’. ’ ‘ i would have a cuter room if i wasn’t a goblin who threw all her shit on the floor. ’ ‘ on two hours of sleep i’m either way too happy or violently homicidal. ’ ‘ let’s go on a date and by date i mean lay in bed and make out for three hours. ’ ‘ alphabet soup. more like times new ramen am i right. ’ ‘ tbh it’s okay if no one else thinks i’m funny because i think i’m a riot. ’ ‘ catching feelings is bullshit. i’m just eating french fries, why i gotta think about kissing you? fuck you. ’ ‘ smiling is so weird like you stretch your eating hole to show happiness. ’ ‘ self care is putting absurd amounts of parmesan cheese on your pasta. ’ ‘ you didn’t go through all of that for nothing. ’ ‘ get you a girl who loses her shit every time you send a selfie. ’ ‘ i wish i could be there to take care of you right now. ’ ‘ home is where the heart is and my heart has always belonged to you. ’ ‘ i just wanna have soft glowy skin, long eyelashes, pink lips, rosy cheeks, lots of cash, and no responsibilities. ’ ‘ ok but platonic forehead kisses. ’ ‘ my heart is guarded but like… very poorly. the kind of guards that would let 3 kids in a trench coat into an r-rated movie. ’ ‘ what doesn’t kill me doesn’t kill me (unfortunately). ’ ‘ do you ever look at a boy and wonder if he moans as pretty as he looks. ’ ‘ life tip: if nothing goes right go to sleep. ’ ‘ by cute do you mean you wanna frick frack or do you mean i look 12? ’ ‘ cats are very pickupable and i think that was a really good choice on their part. ’ ‘ don’t depend on anyone. handle your own shit. ’ ‘ there isn’t one alternate reality where i didn’t fall in love with you. ’ ‘ being my ex must be the worst thing. imagine losing me? ’ ‘ if i say ‘backstreet’s back’ and you do not say ‘ALRIGHT!’ we’re not friends. burn in hell, you sick fuck. ’ ‘ i love every cat in the entire world. every cat on the planet. if there are any cats in outer space, i love them too. ’ ‘ my mom is really that bitch and i’m that bitch jr. ’ ‘ you know you’re fucked when their voice turns you on. ’ ‘ don’t look at my fucking boner when we fight. ’ ‘ not all heroes wear capes. a lot of them wear collars and are called dogs. ’ ‘ it’s you. it will always be you. ’ ‘ why do tattoos cost so much? i’m paying you to injure me. ’ ‘ thank you for being the biggest light in my life and saving me from the darkness. ’

#specify muse #;meme

tier of dickhead dinosaurs from ‘actual satan to will tolerate them sometimes’ as written by chauncey:

Carnataurus: actual satan. Dumbass short snouted ugly satan ass literally the worst push them off a cliff. its always on sight

Allosaurus: Tiny dick energy. Captain prick. Bigass ugly ass bully chicken leg looking motherfucker. Hate him. Burn in the fires of hell. Stealing my fucking food ass bitch.

Utahraptor: Big dumb jock. Just trying to be bigger than us bald motherfucker. Can’t even keep feathers. Egg head bitch who doesn’t know shit. Trying to lap up our success. Idiot.

Ceratosaurus: Not super terrible but still annoying. Literally follows us everywhere. Constantly needing some sort of validation. You play hide and seek for a living you dipshit. Get some actual talent. Stop being a codependent asshole.

T-rex: I tolerate you. Big bulky and dumb with tiny arms. We’re fine as long as you don’t try and scavenge after me your prey is 10x bigger than mine. Just go eat the big fucks and leave me alone and were good.

#tw swearing #ooc

“ For the love of---stop RUMBLING. We are avoiding asshole-saurus and his buddy chungus short snouted satan.”

#ic: Chauncey #dash comm on myself #rizzos enjoying himself let him live

@mellowmuses Luz: Oh my gosh! I love him so much!

“ Oh. Thank you! I am pleased you enjoy my rumblings.”

#ic:Rizzo #mellowmuses #i have no words

Chauncey: why Allosaurus is a hoe and all my homies hate Allosaurus. in this essay i will--

#ooc

“ I was learning!! Cats!! Tasty....but we’re not talking about the taste.”

“ They rumble!! Like this!! See !! ”

He’s imitating a purring cat.

#ic:Rizzo #rizzo............please

mellowmuses:

✨ As she lives and breathes. A Dinosaur. She had read about them. This magic realm had everything! Now it was dawning in the back of her thoughts of how much she wanted to touch a living breathing fossil. She took baby steps towards him also, keeping her cover out in the open. She knew also if Willow, Gus, and Amity especially were here they would all be saying “No Luz!” but she was too tempted.

“.....!!! ”

A rumbling chirp of surprise from the dinosaur as the human figure steps out from the twilight. His feathers puffed up briefly as his green eyes widen and his pupils dialate. It startled him and instinct causes him to hiss in self defense.

----though rather quickly he realizes the juvenile human who’s stalking him and his defenses overturn into curiosity. His head tilts much like a curious pet.

“Oh! Hello!!! human!.”

#mellowmuses #ic:rizzo

askwaterwitch-perbear:

🎮: Ditz lets out a clear cut gulp as the alpha raptor lands by her side on the grass. His movement focused completely on her. Each time he called her out on something she was quick to nod at what he was saying but she also needed to curl her nerves from fangirling out that a raptor pack was on her trail! It was difficult for her not to be so quick to freak about that stuff.

“I’m far from defenseless sire. I’m just here to see an old pal. To answer your question ah, we had plenty of common sense. I regret to say learning about your magnificent species was sadly not the priority of my unit.”

She leaned against the rock. She was still on guard yes, but she was a little too dense to realize half the time the severity of her brash actions.

“Outnumbered maybe yes. But I gotta say I am loving the whole surrounding your prey before you all eat it thing. In the un accurate movies they depict you guys as just surrounding and starin’ at your food. Haha. But I know that’s far from the truth.”

She held a keycard up that she had retrieved in her pocket. She waved it at him to make a case for herself.

“No. You see your highness. If a gem of my type were to walk in anywhere you had to have one’n’a these or you’d been goin’ nowhere. Identification Please. the darn thing would say.”

Ditz did her best to not be so giddy about the dino’s surrounding her because she knew it spelled death for her. Still she did as she could to keep calm and stay a cool lookin’ gaurdian.

“Great. I-I think that’s fine by me. Let’s have a family reunion!”

Click

Click.

Feathers inflated further as he steps less than a foot from the green gem. Chauncey didn’t care what she was blabbering on about right now. He was territorial first, and worried about trivial things second. Mars was one of his offspring and he wasn’t allowing just anyone to fraternize with his pack either.

As if that wasn’t a threat----reflective eyes surrounded Ditz in the forest now. Darkness would light up with pairs of eyes from all sides. A shadow would break itself free from the darkness in the form of one raptor, then two, then three, five, ten...

There was absolutely nowhere to go.

That was of course-----the case for a moment as all the gutteral clicks and rumbles between the avian dinosaurs echoed off the trees. Each one of them taking their chances getting closer, commanded by the alpha himself.

Just a display? Or a plan to take the intruder out?--- A question that wouldn’t be answered as the earth SHOOK suddenly with a roar much too loud to be made by some singular raptor. The trees themselves felt themselves shake of leaves from just the vibration of it.

All raptors heads rear to the location of the noise in surprise. A hiss and call from Chauncey was all it took to send one raptor running,then a pair, and within seconds the whole pack darted full speed in the other direction.

A huff was given from Chauncey before he side steps the gem, knocking her into the ground as he too leaps over the fumbling intruder to follow after his pack.

#ic:chauncey #askwaterwitchperbear