Texts from Ponyville

Hello everypony! Welcome to Texts from Ponyville, where drunk texts meet fluffy ponies for your internet amusement! We accept both submissions and area code requests, and honor when people ask to remain anonymous. Please include an area code with your submission. Submissions DO NOT have to be from Texts From Last Night, we're happy with any crazy texts you give us ^_^ ((Mods' personal blogs: Kaoru Jared Allanime01 PonyPixels)) Sources for Screencaps: Fuck Yeah MLP Rawr-Caps Duets-Graphics MLP: FiM wikia Fillydelphia All texts from submission or from Texts From Last Night Totally awesome ponies romping around your screen can be found here +31 +44 +61 +64 [phone] 205 206 207 208 209 210 212 213 214 215 216 217 219 224 226 228 239 240 248 250 251 253 254 256 262 267 269 301 303 304 305 306 308 309 310 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 321 323 325 330 336 352 360 361 386 401 402 403 404 405 406 407 410 412 413 414 415 416 419 423 425 440 442 443 469 479 480 484 502 503 504 505 506 507 508 509 510 512 515 516 517 518 519 520 530 540 541 559 561 562 563 570 571 574 580 585 586 587 589 602 603 604 606 607 608 609 610 612 613 614 615 616 617 618 619 620 626 630 631 636 641 646 647 650 651 661 662 678 701 702 703 704 705 706 707 708 709 712 713 714 715 716 717 719 720 724 727 732 734 740 757 760 765 770 772 773 774 775 778 779 781 801 802 803 804 805 806 810 813 814 815 816 817 818 828 831 832 843 845 847 850 856 858 859 860 862 863 865 870 902 903 904 907 908 910 912 913 914 916 917 918 919 920 925 928 931 936 937 940 941 949 951 952 954 970 972 973 979 989 Get Yours!

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(480): His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.

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(480): Why is it that my internet connection always crashes when I’m trying to load porn? 

Submission by grabbinglifebyitspages

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(480): He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.

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(518): we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.

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(480):

Why hello there Octavia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?

(774):

Someone just got laid.

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Finally found a text made for Octavia -PonyPixels

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(203): WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS

Submission from: a-stallion-of-wealth-and-taste

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(518): You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It’s my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.

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(518): I’ve wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.

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(203): I’m so high I feel like I’m pedaling a bicycle but I’m laying on the couch.  My body might be vibrating.  I made soup.

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(518):

September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location

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(518): HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.

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(1-210): What should we make tonight?

(210): A baby?

Submission by kisaraforever

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(940): now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place

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(480): Stop. You don’t mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don’t mean that.

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(989): I think I’m finally maturing. I’m happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn’t choke on his tiny penis.

Submission from a-stallion-of-wealth-and-taste

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(203): So I have this game called 14 beers left.  and we both have to drink 7 before we leave

[texts-from-ponyville]

(386): It’s like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina

(386): It really is the softest moustache