My debut has surpassed 100 views on Youtube~ Thank you to everyone who has taken time out of your day to listen to it <3 <3
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@thalia-ilace
My debut has surpassed 100 views on Youtube~ Thank you to everyone who has taken time out of your day to listen to it <3 <3
My friend released his first original song! Please give it a listen and show him some support! It's called "Violet Letters" and it's super pretty~
Growing up I tried many things: Gymnastics, Track Team, Girl Scouts, Horseback Riding, Cheerleading, Basketball, Ice Skating, Drama Club, Choir, Writing, etc. I tried to follow 'popular' things I'd see in tv shows like fashion and writing articles for magazines, and I'd try this kind of play but it never felt like anything more than that. Nothing really made me feel "This is what I was meant to do."
I always liked to dance but I was never good at it. I liked to listen to music a lot and I had a CD player. Since I shared a room, I wasn't allowed to do this or that, so I'd stand on my bed (which was my space) and listen to my mom's old Queen CD, The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack or the mixed CD of a bunch of old songs my grandpa had made me and stand on my bed and dance. I wasn't allowed to do that anymore after some time because my brother was bothered by it, but I felt very happy.
My mom's uncle was Japanese so my mom grew up watching anime from going to his house and was somewhat familiar with the language from hearing him speak/yell it.
My oldest brother is 8 years older than me, so by the time I came around my house was full of anime. We all watched anime together - Mobile Suit Gundam, Ghost in the Shell, .hack, Eureka 7, Inuyasha, Bleach, Rurouni Kenshin, etc.
My favorite parts were the songs. I had a little cassette player so I'd make everyone be quiet and I'd sit by the speakers while the themes played and record them. They were my favorites~ TM Revolution, Siam Shade, Do As Infinity, Every Little Thing, Home Made Kazoku, I loved their music.
I was not allowed on the internet, but one day a friend of mine who knew I liked Japanese music, told me of a site called animelyrics.com! I asked my mom if I could use it so she checked it and gave me the okay. Everyday I'd browse through it and listen to the songs. I'd print them out the lyrics and sing them.
At 12 years old, I found a music video and it had a dance shot (choreography only), version. I learned it quickly and got up in my room (which was my own by then) and sang it while doing the choreography, pretending I was performing for a crowd. For the first time I felt "This is what I was meant to do."
I started singing online and posting covers on Youtube, I met my best friends through that! (My current group mates Milky & Misha - as well as my audio mixer for my debut, fairytune!)
I made friends, had fun and found a lot of people who shared this newfound dream of mine - to debut.
I always had pitch problems, I really struggled. Some said I was tone deaf. I was bullied for my voice - told that I was faking it, so I'd try to sing and speak deeper. I was told I was an alto so I was given low lines. My pitch worsened and my throat was constantly in pain.
As I got older I decided to take singing lessons. I told her I was an alto and when we did our warmups on the piano she kept smiling at me and asked, "Would you mind if we tried to go just a little bit higher?" and I'd say "Okay!" It started to get easier and easier and at the end she turned to me and said "You're not an alto, you're a high soprano." and I said "Everyone's told me I'm an alto, I don't sing well." and she said "You're having a hard time down here because this isn't in your range. Your low is all the way up here!" So she helped me stretch my range and as I worked I slipped back into my natural voice. My vocal damage still needed to be repaired and it took a long time but eventually I was able to sing healthy again~
I was in so many groups preparing for debut that fell apart. I wrote lyrics and hired a composer and a topliner with money I had from my birthday. (I am disabled I cannot work). The composer delivered the song that was not at all what I had wanted or asked for. I didn't like it, but I had no choice but to accept it. The topliner sent us the work and my lyrics were rushed, he sang it too low and it was not possible for me to sing. So my money was gone and I had a song I couldn't sing or use. I had worked on an album independently and it was scrapped, I was scouted by a company and then they decided not to take me. My dream was in my hand and like water it trickled out, no matter how hard I tried to grab it and hold on. I was already in my mid 20s. I'd aged out of auditions. I gave up on my dream.
After facing a lot of bullying and harassment these past few years, I've struggled. I've been unable to relieve my stress, had frequent breakdowns and meltdowns and dangerous thoughts. My therapist and my family didn't know what to do, none of the 'supports' were helping, none of the relaxation tools were helping, nothing was working.
I thought about the last time I felt my happiest. It was when I was pursuing my dream, singing and dancing. I started to write lyrics. It was something I always thought was so crazy how people could write and create a song, certainly it was not something I could ever do professionally. Even the song I created way back when, was not 'good'. Even the song that I had written and composed myself were not 'good'. But, I thought "These are okay for my age."
I had no interest in composing, but writing lyrics felt good, so I tried that. For the first time, my stress started to be relieved. So I wrote and wrote and wrote. People told me "These are really good!" My therapist was also impressed.
A friend then turned me to Suno ai. I'd always been against AI but after reading on Suno, I felt it was a good ai to use. So I tried it and I cried. Hearing my words to a song, was crazy and something I never thought I'd ever have happen to me. I sat and just created and created and my stress was finally relieving. I felt "I want to debut" and I was able to face my dream again.
My parents lent me money. I was able to purchase Suno's license and after some conversation, they gave me the rights for the songs that I had made prior. I learned to arrange, I learned to edit songs, and add my own flares and adjustments.
I hired an artist for my single cover with the rest of it and was finally, at age 29, able to achieve my dream of debuting. I felt, "Finally I have found room for myself in this world."
And I made my first sale <3
My life that was stuck in a box because of my disability, because of what others told me I was allowed and was not allowed to achieve, but now my life has opened up and a future came into view.
This year I was able to debut, I was able to make my first sale, and I was able to make my first income writing lyrics for someone else.
I'm not the best and I have a lot of shortcomings, but that's okay because now I am free to create, and I am capable now of making a name for myself in the way that I feel like I was meant to. I've learned that I'm good at writing lyrics, I'm good at producing and I'm good at A&R directing. Maybe I'm not a good singer, but that's okay, I don't have to be. I can be Thalia Ilace, no matter what.
Thank you for reading all this, if anyone would like to hire me for lyrics please feel free to hit me up. If you'd like to support me with any tips or buy my single, my ko-fi is here: https://ko-fi.com/thaliailace My youtube also has free to download songs (not sung by me, but are just my lyrics/productions): https://www.youtube.com/@ThaliaIlace Thank you, I hope that anyone reading this knows that you do not need to be trapped in a box. You can find your way. Even if you are not the best, even if you are not good at something, if that is your dream, no matter what you can achieve it.
Hello! I've created a short story on #Verbals It's titled "Any Other Day" and ranges 5 chapters. I feel a bit rusty, and this is my first time writing in First Person, so I hope I did it well. Here is my work, please give it some attention! Thank you! https://verbals.io/book/01976437-98e4-77b6-8676-a503c1043886
Hello! I've stepped into the world of lyric writing. Please listen to my first release - Born to be an Heiress. It's a fun, silly little track! Please enjoy with a smile on your face and have a good laugh~ It would mean a lot to me if you liked & followed too! Let me know how you like it <3 https://soundcloud.com/thalia_ilace/born_to_be_an_heiress
What is up with Tik Tok??
Honestly, it was never an app that I found intriguing because I'm not someone who really enjoys watching short videos, so I never had one. Everyone raves about it and said I should join it, especially with my future business endeavors, so I made one a few days ago and it is the worst app I've ever used in my life? First of all, it has taken DAYS for me to be able to follow anyone because it's just kept deleting my follows. Then, finally my friend and I (shout out Pluma thank you <3) were testing it and trying to get it working. I tried in-app AND in browser and now it's flagging literally everything I say and I can't send ANY messages at all?
It also won't allow me to put my phone number in and says that I've tried too many times to enter it already even though it's my first time ever doing so? Wtf??? Anyone know what's up? I can't do anything.
On December 28, 2024 my uncle/godfather, passed away. He was sick, and had a fall and they took him to the hospital. The doctors believed he would return home after treatment. He seemed to improve, and he ate some food, and then suddenly, he was gone in the night. There was a complication from his fall, that I feel is a bit too gruesome/personal to share.
This man, was a 2nd father to me. Someone who I would go to live with at times when I was little, who supported me and eased my anxiety a lot at family functions. When I was little I carried around my baby blanket, and he'd pick me up to take me to his house and say "Oh gosh are you carrying around that rag still?" I remember I got old enough that I didn't carry it anymore and he threw my suitcase in his car and said "Hey! Look at that! You finally grew out of that rag!" and I laughed and said "It's in my suitcase~" and he just laughed. When I got to my mid 20s, I told him I still sleep with it and he laughed, rolled his eyes and said "OH GEEZE!" When I was really struggling with my anxiety, I came to a family function for the first time in a while. I refused to put my purse down and had it on my lap the whole time. Everyone kept telling me to go put it down in the main room with all the other purses, and kept saying, "You can put your purse down!" "Why don't you put your purse down?" but to be honest, I really needed it. I needed to have something to hold on to, it had supplies for me in case I started having a panic attack, gave me something to fiddle with and it also made me feel hidden away a little sitting on my lap. My uncle joked with me and said "Did you win the lottery? Is your lottery money in there? Don't you worry kid, I won't let any of them make you put that purse down!" so I laughed and said "Yeah! They're all trying to get some of my money!" and he laughed and said "Don't leave that thing unattended for one second! All you have to do is take me on a trip with you, where should we go?" Then he kept telling everyone "MY TICKET TO FIJI IS IN THERE! THIS KID'S TAKIN' ME TO FIJI!" and everyone stopped asking me to put my purse down and it eased my anxiety so much. Then, the focus came onto my purse and the jokes they were all making about the "lottery money" I must've had hidden in there, rather than on me.
When he had surgery years ago, I sent him a flowers and a get well soon card, but, I forgot to sign it! He called me up later and asked if I'd sent them and I said yes they were from me, and he said "I knew it! I was like 'There's no name but it can't be from anyone else-'" My own father, has been very ill for many years and I've been constantly told "This is his last year." "This is probably his last Christmas." So, to be honest, I never imagined my dad walking me down the aisle. I had always thought it would be my uncle, who is my 2nd dad, who would walk me down the aisle. Knowing he won't be there to do that, that he won't even be able to attend, or to meet my children, or meet my loved ones, is very hard. For, over a year now, I've been dealing with something very difficult that has caused a lot of stress and strain on me and it has increased my anxiety 10 fold. My anxiety is so bad, I unfortunately, will not be able to attend my uncle's funeral.
My aunt/godmother (his wife) and my cousins (his children) have been kind enough to let me write a letter to him that will be included in his casket and I'm so so sooooo grateful they're allowing me to do that.
I had originally planned to resume Fear to Fortune around January - February, but my uncle's funeral is not until next month. Honestly, I am very affected by this loss and I have been struggling a lot with it. I want to stick to that promise, but I don't know if I will be able to. I'm going to do my best. My focus will be my letter to my uncle.
For now, to my dearest uncle, thank you for being in my life, thank you for being my uncle and my godfather and for being my other dad. Thanks for everything. My rag and I will miss you. <3
Writers when it's time to write the story no one forced them to come up with in the first place 🙄
Hello! My official site has now launched! Please check it out if you have the time!! <3 Find it here!
The Shape of Ideas
While I'm here, if anyone would like to go take a look at my novels, that would be okay~ You can find them here