The ADHD feels are real

(Not to be confused with ThatADHDFeel. We are not the same person). Female (33) diagnosed with ADHD at 29. Learning about myself, who I am, how I think, and why I think it. I post this content on Tumblr only. If you see my posts elsewhere, they weren't posted by me

[thatadhdfeeling]

Hi!

And welcome to my blog!

This is my safe space where I can let out the ADHD related thoughts in my head, as well as share some of my experiences. I made this public in the hopes that others can relate to me in ways that make them feel less alone. It's also a place where I try to help others help each other, by understanding why we think the way that we do, and to remind you of the values you have.

A few disclaimers:

I am not a medical professional. Please don't take what I say as undeniably accurate, I make mistakes too, and am also still learning. You're welcome to ask me for advice or tips, but I cannot diagnose you, and I cannot recommend medications. If you think you might have ADHD, please seek proper medical advice.

What has benefitted me, might not benefit you. You are more than welcome to ask me for advice or to share some tips and tricks that have helped me, but what has worked for me, might not work for you, and what didn't work for me, might work for you. Not everyone with ADHD is the same, not everyone is comfortable with or offended by the same language, and not everyone has the same struggles or victories in the same way. We are all different.

I only post this content on Tumblr. I do not have any other social media connections to this blog, I do not use this username anywhere else online, and I do not have a Reddit account. If you see my username elsewhere, that is not me. If you see my content posted elsewhere, it was not posted by me.

If you share my posts, please credit me. I am fine with people sharing my posts outside of Tumblr, just please give me the credit. These are my personal thoughts that I'm sharing with you. Posting without credit doesn't show me support, and it also doesn't allow me the opportunity to learn from others who respond to it.

Please do not edit my posts without my permission. If you feel one of my posts needs to be corrected in any way, please talk to me about it first. I would like to have the opportunity to correct my mistakes myself and learn from them. If you see my posts elsewhere but are slightly different than what you see here, please refer to this blog's version of the post.

I am ThatADHDFeeling and TheADHDFeeling. These are the only two usernames associated with this blog. One I use to post, and one I use to respond to comments. I did this to make organizing this blog easier on myself, because I'm pretty crap at handling social media. I do use my personal Facebook account with my real name to respond to my posts being shared on Facebook, but that is it.

Any usernames other than those two mentioned, regardless of how similar, are not associated with this blog. I am not ThatADHDFeel or ADHDFeel or ThatADHDFeeling-Blog or any other username. As mentioned, I do use my personal Facebook account with my real name to respond to posts sharing my content on Facebook. No other username or account on any platform has anything to do with this blog. Use of my username outside of this blog is not me. If you see something posted by my username elsewhere but it does not appear in this blog, then it was not created by me. Posts that do appear both elsewhere and on this blog may have been created by me, but were not posted by me.

This is my safe space. My journal. My thoughts. You are welcome to feel at home here. If there is something I can do to change or improve in order to help you feel more comfortable, please let me know. This place should be a safe space for you as well, within the boundaries of keeping it a safe space for myself and everyone else.

I hope you enjoy my thoughts and feel welcome to message me any time. Be kind to others, be kind to yourself, and whether you have ADHD or not:

You are wonderful and deserve to feel it.

[thatadhdfeeling]

Maximum word limits

When writing about a topic I'm passionate about, my personal opinions, describing myself, or explaining my experiences

are my nemesis

Minimum word limits about subjects I don't have any interest in are also frustrating

[thatadhdfeeling]

Them: *Says something*

Me: *Responds appropriately*

Them: Did you hear what I said?

Me: Yes

Them: Can you repeat back to me what I said?

Me: ................ No.

My brain knows which facial expressions fit, which yes or no responses could fit, and can even continue the conversation briefly, but it can't always take in the actual words being said well enough to consciously process them.

I'm sorry if you have to repeat yourself many times for me. Thank you for checking to see if I really did understand.

[thatadhdfeeling]

We all have knowledge on that one specific category of a specific subject that we can win any trivia contest with

But it's a specific subset of the topic in general, not the whole topic

If you find a game show based on that specific category of that specific topic of that specific subject, let me know

I could use a million bucks

[thatadhdfeeling]

Hi, I’m so sorry if I’m bothering you and I’m even more sorry for the length of this ask. I was wondering if I could get some advice, if that’s okay. I’m failing school. Like, I have 30+ missing assignments but it just keeps building up. I have a lot of problems being able to complete schoolwork that make it take very long for me to do. I frequently get distracted, zone out, forget what I’m doing or lose my train of thought, am just entirely unable to start the assignment for hours despite sitting right in front of it and trying to start the entire time, etc.

In order to have any hope of passing, I’d need an IEP (I already have a 504 plan, but it isn’t doing much to help.) but in order to get an IEP I’d need a diagnosis for what the problem is. Adhd is something that’s come up a lot because it rings true and applies to almost all of my struggles. In fact, it’s pretty much the only possible candidate at the moment for what I’m experiencing. But the thing is, adhd is something that starts from birth. So if I had adhd, it’d have to have been prevalent throughout my whole childhood.

The problem I’m having, though, is that I can barely remember my school experience from my childhood. It’s just kind of a blur. I was really anxious all the time as a kid, and I tend to forget events I was anxious during so I only have, like, 4 memories from school. Did I zone out a ton or just a decent amount? Not sure. Did I hyperfocus? Possibly. It’s so frustrating, because I know that these are things I need to know in order for adhd to be a possibility, but I can’t even remember what I experienced at school as a child! And I can’t rely on others for input that much, because I was a super super sly kid. As in, I’d constantly lie about problems I was having and find sneaky work-arounds to avoid doing certain things without anyone catching me. It’s how no one noticed I had severe anxiety and depression, but would I even be capable of going under the radar for adhd if I had it?

I’m sorry was a lot of info for what I’m trying to ask, but basically, do you know what a person can do if they’re trying to identify if they had adhd, but don’t remember enough about their childhood? Also, do you know of any problems that could mimic adhd symptoms without being adhd? Thank you so much if you read all this, and I hope you have a nice day.

(Also, some extra info in case it helps at all. Here’s what I do know for sure about my childhood: I’d have to put in a lot of effort to not overreact to small things people said to me, I got extremely irritated when changes occurred, I was a daydreamer (Although I’m not sure how extreme it was.), I was a people-pleaser, I chewed on things and fidgeted a lot, and I had issues with talking too fast and struggled with volume. I did very well in school too. (Although I don’t remember how hard I was working to do that well, and part of my success was attributed to my obsessive reading at the time.))

Well first off, I'm really sorry you're struggling so much with school work and being unable to remember a lot of your childhood. It sounds like a really rough time. Take care of yourself and remember that you still deserve self love.

What can you do if you're trying to identify if you have ADHD but cannot remember your childhood?

ADHD is something that many people with the disorder struggle with throughout their childhood, even if they don't realize they have it. Childhood and adolescent experiences are used to help identify if you have ADHD and can get you that diagnosis. However, it doesn't stop affecting you as you grow up. You can learn techniques to help manage your struggles even without being aware of having a disorder, but being able to utilize tools and techniques doesn't stop you from having ADHD. My advice is to talk to a doctor or a professional in psychology about the symptoms you're experiencing at this age, and the little that you remember about your childhood, even if it's not very much. Knowing what you experience now can help them diagnose you, regardless of what you remember about your past. Right now you feel you need help, and that's valid. How you feel right now is valid and should be taken into consideration.

Does anything else mimic ADHD symptoms without actually being ADHD?

Yes. Many ADHD symptoms are experienced by many other people. It becomes a disorder when those symptoms are more severe, more frequent, and interfere with your ability to function in ways society says are successful. Everyone gets distracted. Everyone loses emotional control at times. Everyone forgets things. Everyone daydreams or zones out. Everyone gets fidgety sometimes. Everyone experiences times of low motivation. And at times it can get in the way of their tasks. But that doesn't mean they have ADHD. And there are symptoms that are found in other disorders as well. For example, ASD, BPD, anxiety, depression, as well as some others all have overlapping symptoms. You can be diagnosed with just one of these, or multiple. Diagnosing disorders that are primarily neurological is trickier and tend to take longer, as the criteria are based around a person's experiences, rather than physical abilities. That doesn't mean that there aren't physical aspects, but they aren't as easy to observe for ease of both doctor and patient. Not everyone who says they feel like a failure is going to get a CT scan. ADHD is not only a neurodevelopmental disorder, it is also a nervous system disorder (don't quote me on this, I haven't done the research, this is just what my behavioural psychologist has told me. He also happens to have ADHD. I'm doing my own reading on it, but can't say I know for sure that he's right, although I do trust him). It can take many appointments, many tests, and a lot of self advocating to get a correct diagnosis. But the goal here is to get you the help that you need. Whether that will come from an ADHD diagnosis, a different diagnosis, multiple diagnoses, or just access to aids and resources, getting you the help you need is what's important. Keep trying, keep advocating for yourself, keep talking about what you feel and what you need, keep an open mind about what might be the underlying issue, and hopefully it leads you to what you need in order to succeed.

The path to success isn't the same for everyone. But neither is success in itself. Having ADHD doesn't mean you cannot succeed. You just might have to take a different path to get there, one that works better for your unique brain, and maybe your result of success isn't the same as what society tells you. Society is built for neurotypical brains. That doesn't make us wrong. We struggle to fit into society's way of doing things. But the more we advocate, the more society has to learn to accommodate us. Because we can do some pretty cool things with our brains when given the opportunity to show it.

[thatadhdfeeling]

Hi friends,

I have been notified that in a recent post of mine, I was incorrect when referring to forgetting the existence of an object as an object permanence issue. If anyone took offense at this, I want to formally apologize.

I have since edited the original post to remove that phrase, as I don't want to spread misinformation or incorrect terminology. Why am I telling you this? Because it would be unfair for me to silently change something that people have already responded to. You deserve to know when I edit my posts, and it is not shameful to admit when you are wrong.

I will be reading up on both object permanence and working memory in regards to executive dysfunction and ADHD specifically. If you wish to share any sources you might have on these topics, please do!

I am not an expert on this disorder. In fact, I was only recently diagnosed. I welcome any opportunity to learn and grow and become more educated. Understanding why I think the way that I do has really helped me accept who I am in a more positive light.

Don't be afraid to learn, help educate others, be kind and understanding to those who are mistaken, and remember that it's okay to make genuine mistakes. Learn from them and grow, and use those mistakes as an opportunity to improve. Because improvement in anything, no matter how slow or how small is such a beautiful thing.

[thatadhdfeeling]

ADHD superpower:

I can do magic tricks

I shall now turn around

Abracadabra!

That thing there? It disappeared

Not only do I no longer see it, I no longer think of it

It has gone from existence

I am a magician!

[thatadhdfeeling]

To my fellow neurodivergent warriors: Is today a day you can't do anything?

Some days are harder than others. Some days our executive functioning abilities are at rock bottom and we struggle. It's hard, we have no motivation, we can't focus on what we need to, we can't get up, we can't do the thing...

We just...

Can't.

During these times, do you sit there and think "I can do this, it's easy, just do it. Go! Move!"

Stop.

It's okay.

You are neurodivergent. You are not a failure.

Society isn't built for brains like ours. We think and act differently and sometimes we will struggle to do even the basic of tasks. And that is okay.

It is okay to have an unproductive day. Tomorrow might be better. Just because you could do it yesterday, doesn't mean you can do it today. But that also means that just because you can't do it today, it doesn't mean you won't be able to tomorrow.

It's more encouraging to accept that you will have days of severe executive dysfunction than to tell yourself to just do it, then fail. Don't set yourself impossible standards. So what if you can't do that thing today? Your brain is amazing and can do so many things other brains can't.

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it's stupid." -Albert Einstein

[thatadhdfeeling]

"Today I adulted!"

Oh, happy Birthday! Today you reached legal age!

"No, I mean... I did the laundry."

I use this phrase a lot. "I adulted". And I may automatically use it again. But being an adult is not defined by your ability to accomplish a task society has deemed a responsible adult chore. Being an adult is being above the legal age set by said society.

Society tells us that "being an adult" means we must always be successful with executive functioning tasks, mostly because that makes us better at 40+ hour a week office jobs.

But very few people are actually "good" at those types of jobs, or have the desire to work at them for decades. Even very few neurotypical people are built for that.

Many neurodivergents including us with ADHD struggle with executive functioning, but that doesn't mean we never become adults. We may have executive dysfunction, but we also excel in many other areas. We think differently. We think in a diverse way. We are neurodivergent. We are adults!

Just by existing we are adulting. If you got out of bed this morning, you did an amazing and difficult thing! You faced the day! If you did the laundry today, that's huge! You deserve so much praise for that! If you survived a shift at work, be proud of yourself! That's amazing! And if you did none of those things and stayed under the covers all day, then that's okay, tomorrow can be a better day, but guess what? You still adulted!

Be proud of your accomplishments, but don't let anyone tell you that you aren't an adult, or you failed to be a grown up, just because you didn't do what society tells you you have to do to succeed. You kicked them in the behind and succeeded anyway just by being you.

And if you're underage, well you succeeded too. Look at you go! Keep it up! You're amazing!

[thatadhdfeeling]

To whomever is currently reading this:

Don't forget about your drink that's slightly outside of your line of sight

[william-snekspeare]

working memory bad 💚

[thatadhdfeeling]

Executive dysfunction hitting hard:

"Come on, just do it! It's not that hard. Get off your ass and don't be so lazy."

Omg! Why didn't I think of that? 🙃

...

...

... 😠

[thatadhdfeeling]

This was commented by @darkxwolf on my post about ADHD procrastination. I thought it was so well said that I just had to share it with you guys!

Stress is icky!

Thank you so much @darkxwolf for this explanation and for allowing me to share it as its own post on my blog

[jennhasadhd]

[spoonsforminutes]

I can hardly believe it’s July already, but happy disability pride month!!

While still not recognized federally, July is an important month to celebrate disability in all its forms and to dismantle ableism in our society as it affects and prevents so many people from gaining basic rights and accomplishing their life goals. All physical, mental, and chronic disabilities are valid, and disabled voices deserve to be heard!

non-disabled individuals are encouraged to reblog

[thatadhdfeeling]

Okay thank you for creating this blog

As an adhder the memes are all relatable

You're very welcome!! ☺️

[thatadhdfeeling]

Priorities:

My room is a mess

Clothes everywhere

Cups and plates that belong in the dishwasher

My bathroom needs cleaning

Trash needs to be taken out

I have to work on a Birthday gift

Install a program on my computer

Pick up my prescriptions

Short term....

I need to get dressed and brush my teeth.

What does ADHD brain demand I do?

Reorganize the clothes in the drawers that I forgot even existed and haven't worn for years and should probably donate.

I'm still in my pajamas. My room is horrific. But at least the clothes inside the drawers I never open are folded.

Priorities....