thatgirldausi

CW: Me

[poetry-siir]

The great thing about Tumblr is that sometimes someone writes just what you need to read.

poetry-siir © (via poetry-siir)

[thatgirldausi]

Well, well, well... look what we have here. Me, returning to tumblr, AGAIN. Where am I at this point in my life? Working a brand new career, on a new self love journey. I recently was hired on at a Dermatologist office. So far, i’ve really come to enjoy my coworkers, and the doctor. I’ve never worked in Dermatology before, so I will be filled with new information from medications, to procedures, and maybe even a new side of myself. I’ve never been confident in my skin. I’ve always had acne. I’ve never had money or access to healthcare. Now that I do I am excited. I get to work 8 hours a day to pay my bills, and learn how to take care of myself at the same time. A big reason why I wanna share my journey is because I have less than perfect skin. It’s not the worst, but I have combination/ oily skin with huge pores. When I watch beauty influencers their skin is always so beautiful. They really know how to cover blemishes! When I buy their products and try their techniques it doesn’t look how I imagined when seeing them use it. I just wanna join together with people who also want to learn about their skin, different skin types, and what works best for each. I also have an esthetician who has different beliefs than my doctor when it comes to products. This also has sparked my interest in exploring more into dermatology. 

[travel-versa-deactivated2024080]

Shinning moon

[twofivee]

sometimes u gotta be like “ okay ” & leave that shit alone

[streetkillaz]

“Talk with people who make you see the world differently.”

— streetkillaz

[thatgirldausi]

Just give me something to dream about

[amargedom]

““The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.””

—

[thehopefulquotes]

“Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference.”

— Barbara de Angelis

[thatgirldausi]

A million times ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[thatgirldausi]

I have succeeded, but still feel so empty. All these things, and I do what is required of me. I'm not the best, and I could always be better. But that doesn't diminish the hard work I've put in, even tho I'll never be a trend setter. I fade into the back, where darkness grows, but you won't ever know that, because my secrets go unknown. A new chapter, along with new character, until it dies. Help me keep pushing, and I will always try.

[thatgirldausi]

Do you ever take one step forward, and wind up like 50 steps back

[thatgirldausi]

But, I'm not like everyone else.

[thatgirldausi]

I want to die

[thatgirldausi]

I sit here and lay awake, wondering who you are. I once knew you but that person is gone. I walk along the roads at night, inhaling my cigarette I wish I would die. My rock, my anchor, cut off from its ties. There is no foundation for a sound mind. My world came crashing down, future dreams lost, and all because I was never good enough. I always had a feeling, I could never figure why you kept me around. I help you do better when you're feeling down, but other than that, I can't help you out. Two strangers, maybe really good friends, but never lovers. We come from different ends. So different I dont know where to begin, all I know is whatever we had has now come to an end. What are best friends but between them no trust. No room to be yourself, no room to open up. There's nothing I can do, you already chose to be done. In your eyes, I'm the mess, and that's why my hope is gone. I look up to see you looking down, I never thought you would treat me like spit on the ground.

[bookwormingparty]

[autumncozy]

By recklesstonight

[thatgirldausi]

I lay awake on these winter nights, there isn't a day where I have any insight. Staring at the ceiling, stuck with this same feelings, that never go away. It's not self hate, although it exists, it comes and goes in waves. This is when you weigh 110, but you cant get up because a boulders been placed upon your chest. You dont cry, just stare into the deep abyss, the lonely sky. That's also so empty, and you realize you're just a spec in time. What does it matter if I keep living my life, I'm stuck under a rock with no hope to survive. I just sit and think about all the possibilities. How I've felt, and how different I am from others. There's so many things that make me, me. They're all so different and odd, not what society says I should be. All these invisible rules for living, fit for one group of people, its humiliating. It's almost a shame to be myself, to not be everybody else. Happy and successful, dreams and goals. But here I lay until this boulder rolls. As you can see, there is no pattern to me. Just lost and broken, I wish I could laugh freely. Over thinker, I recognize things you wouldn't. I won't put up with your behavior because as an adult you shouldn't. But you're just you, and I'm just me. I'm stuck under a boulder and you're walking around free.

[bitchpleaseimdeadddd]