Why are you here?

no, seriously

[inumbrapugnabimus-maybe]

Have a random confused four

[hanfugallery]

chinese fashion (ming dynasty hanfu matched with European vintage fashion) by 远山乔

[hanfugallery]

Chinese hanfu in rosey pink color

[shnowyfox]

it would be so awesome

it would be so cool

[bandtshirt]

LMAOOOOOOOOO

[theblackd4hlia]

no but seriously one time i ordered something from adam & eve (surprise a big ol dildo) and the order said discreet shipping and i was like cool ya know cause i lived with three dudes in an apartment and also had to go to the apartment office to pick up my package so discreet is dope and i got the package delivery notification like sick im about to dick myself so i walked my happy horny ass down to the office and told the lady my name and she went into the package delivery room to grab it and it took her a minute and she came out with a dick shaped bag just grasping the shaft of it and i looked at it mortified and had to grab the balls part of the package from the woman and she let go and it just wiggled and i could feel the squish through the bag and it was just horrible

[anonbuddha]

If it’s any consolation, I get it. I’m a trans guy who wears a packer. One day I was in the restroom and pulled my pants down. I really had to go so I did it fast and the magnet clip came undone and my dick flopped out of my boxers and bounced into the stall next to me.

The OCCUPIED stall next to me.

I wanted to die. There was this horrible forever silence moments. Then the dude just goes, “Uh, you dropped your dick man,” and nudges it over with his foot.

[vaiitrii-deactivated20210105]

“You dropped your dick man”

[radiofreederry]

Typo of the century

[wolfythewitch]

Okay I won’t lie, I didn’t realize what the actual typo was. I thought the joke was that it should have said “pubic health”

[wolfythewitch]

Being ace but not fully sex repulsed is like "Yeah I'd maybe try it once. Just to see what the hype is about."

[fallingtowers]

me: it seems to me that if the door is the cathedral's pussy, then the archivolts are its labia. wouldnt you agree, your excellency?

catholic bishop i cornered on his way to his car: the next time i pray i will ask god to kill you with lightning bolts

[aropride]

[deathstars]

HELLO ! have you thought about Van Gogh’s First Steps today ?

[deathstars]

Here you go. This world is beautiful. Humans are beautiful. I love you

[spiribia]

I like in rpgs where if you don’t romance two of the characters they start romancing each other instead. You think you’re the only fish in the sea

[shiftythrifting]

Please, the 2nd hand books from the bookshop keep on getting more "persuasive"

😩

[cowardsexual]

stratt and grace and the rest of the phm science team running on 4 cumulative hours of sleep at an unscheduled conference. dimitri and lokken are trying to explain a new complication in the hail mary's fueling system and the resources necessary to iron it out but they keep getting interrupted by government officials butting in until grace (who doesn't even look up from his laptop and checked out of the conversation two days ago) snaps "we raise our hands to speak"

complete silence for like 3 seconds. the french prime minister sheepishly raises his hand and stratt smiles for the first time that week (grace buries his entire head behind his laptop screen for wont of a better option, like jumping straight into the sea)

[occudo]

They wear suits, but they don't even know basic etiquette.

Based on @cowardsexual 's post of a very sleepy phm science team and Grace's teacher instincts

[teaboot]

I was debating pre- and post- smartphone existentialism with an older gentleman today and he stopped part way through and said “Why are you a security guard? Why aren’t you teaching this at some college somewhere?” And I didn’t know what to say so I went with “Well I used to make art but nobody pays an artist”

[teaboot]

I want to invoke thought and wonder and introspection and encourage the passions of every soul I meet forever and ever and dig until I find the glorious potential for creation and experience and joy in every single one but unfortunately I must pay rent and so I stand, a meat shield, an NPC with unlockable dialogue

[oojamaflip-whatchamacallit]

#capitalism brain tells you that anyone interesting must fight to the top of their interest#and precludes the possibility of everyone everyone everyone already being interesting

[sutexii]

ABSOL Print ✦ X

[drawnsnake]

I cried watching Project Hail Mary btw