Rebel Leader

Someone's got to make the tough decisions around here.

[the-bellamyblake]

the-clarkegriffin:

Bellamy… [Her hands travelled to her torso, warm blood coating them quickly. She felt lightheaded, but the pain didn’t affect her. She laughed slightly.] So this is what it feels like to die.

Clarke. [In an instant, he reached out for her, placing his hands on top of her own, trying to keep the blood in, urging it to stop. But it didn't and he shook his head.] 

No, no, no. [He lifted one hand away, using his thumb to turn her chin toward him.] You're not gonna die. I... fuck. We have to get you back... 

[He turned toward his sister, toward Raven, both with their hands to their mouths, eyes wide...] 

We have to get her back!

[the-clarkegriffin]

[Clarke was out of breath from running from the Grounder Camp. She had to stop. Her legs burned, her chest was heavy, and she couldn’t move any further. But she couldn’t stay out in the open. Hiding in a bush, she caught her breath. 

It was then she heard the familiar voice of Bellamy Blake. She breathed a sigh of relief. She found her way home. Carefully, she pulled herself towards his voice, peaking out from the bush.]

[the-clarkegriffin]

[the-bellamyblake]

[Bellamy's fingers tightened around his gun the moment he heard Raven say that there was someone in the bushes. Clarke, Finn and that other boy hadn't made it back yet, meaning that the grounders probably had something to do with it. They all knew the dangers of staying out past dark. They wouldn't do it by choice. He moved quietly but quickly. Like hell he would let one of these bastards slip through their fingers. 

When a head suddenly came into view, all Bellamy saw was a knife in their hand before his finger let go of the trigger. It wasn't until he moved closer that he noticed the blonde hair, the familiar clothes, those eyes...It was Clarke.

He dropped his gun, but he couldn't move. 

He couldn't even breathe.]

[the-clarkegriffin]

Fine. What am I doing wrong?

[the-bellamyblake]

Here... 

[the-clarkegriffin]

Not soon enough.

[the-bellamyblake]

 If you let me help you, maybe you'd learn a lot faster. 

[the-clarkegriffin]

Dammnit.

[the-clarkegriffin]

[the-bellamyblake]

Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it soon. 

[the-bellamyblake]

[the-clarkegriffin]

More Than This | Para 001

[the-clarkegriffin]

Clarke welcomed the light tone in his voice. Over the past few days, between the impending Grounder - Delinquent battle and the virus, she hasn’t had much time to smile. She’s snuck a few in here or there, but she hadn’t felt happy or carefree. She longed to feel that again. Maybe it wasn’t a possibility anymore. How much tragedy can one person take before there’s no joy left?

Though, there was something inside her that said it could be possible. With Bellamy.

Clarke gingerly picked up two berries in her fingers and played with them briefly before sneaking them between her teeth. “Yeah,” she said. “We wouldn’t want to go through that again,” she whispered. Though, that was a lie. Clarke saw her father that day. Even if it wasn’t real, she wanted to see him again.

She knew not everyone’s experience was like hers, however. It was after the hallucinations that she saw Bellamy at his lowest. His guilt took over and it was hard to watch. After witnessing that, she knew Bellamy was a good person despite his faults. She needed him; everyone did.

"We should probably head back," she said. "I’m sure people are wondering where we are." She didn’t necessarily want to leave, enjoying the solitude of the forrest with Bellamy’s company, but work had to be done. Whether she wanted it or not. "We’ve got a war to win."

[the-bellamyblake]

"Right." He nodded, slowly standing, his hand moving to touch her shoulder on the way up. 

"After this is all over, we deserve a little break." He mumbled. His hand was still on her shoulder and took him a moment to remove it, her warmth disappearing almost instantly once he did. He popped another berry in his mouth, almost flinching at the memory of being surrounded by the people who's death was his fault. 

Murderer. 

He shook his head a little, a small, sad, smile gracing his features. 

"But who am I kidding." He lifted his eyes to meet Clarke's.

"Leader's don't get breaks." 

[the-clarkegriffin]

More Than This | Para 001

[the-clarkegriffin]

A few weeks ago, if someone told Clarke she’d find comfort in Bellamy Blake, she would have burst out laughing. The man she met on the drop ship that day, the one who let chaos reign all for his own selfish reasons wasn’t the man who sat next to her today. Clarke wasn’t sure if Bellamy’s changed since then or if she just saw more to him over time. Either way, she was glad he was with her.

Even if the circumstances were warfare and death.

As Bellamy spoke, Clarke couldn’t help but remember the conversation she had with him when Finn was on his deathbed. We’re not soldiers, Bellamy, she said with such ferocity and sadness. Now, that’s exactly what they were. Clarke agreed with him. The Grounders had the advantage over a group of 86 teenagers.

"We have to cover all our bases. We can’t let ourselves be scared of the unknown, but use what we do know," she said, shaking her head. She didn’t know how to plan for a battle. Neither of them did.

"We have to strike first and strike big. Waiting for their attack would be the death of us all. Somehow, we have to get the upper hand." Clarke turned her head and looked at Bellamy. She tried to mask the worry that filled her eyes. "I don’t know how."

Clarke was sure that she would be able to devise a plan if she had more time and resources; the pressure and time constraint made it difficult to think straight. She would kill to be able to ask her mother or father for advice. She took a breath. 

"I’m sorry I snapped at you earlier," she said suddenly. The sentence was off-topic and pointless in the situation they were in. Bellamy had thick skin and Clarke’s sharp tongue wouldn’t scratch it, but she just blurted it out. Maybe she wanted to say it more than she thought; she didn’t know why.

[the-bellamyblake]

"We'll figure it out." He repeated the same words she said to him, back when he thought it impossible to get pardoned for his crimes. 

"We always do. I'm just relieved we're on the same page." As much as he respected her, they argued constantly. At times he was a better man because of it, but that didn't change how completely frustrating she could become. Other times she wasn't seeing the larger picture. They balanced each other out, but they also set one another off. 

He arched a brow at her surprising apology over something so small, he had already forgotten about it. 

"I think I'll live, Princess." He chuckled, his tone playful for once. Often their conversations were always so serious, so vital to everyone's survival. They've only ever had a moment here or there back when they found the guns and before Finn decided on having Clarke attempt to make an agreement with the enemy. It's one thing to try all our options, it's another to risk Clarke's life. He'll never understand what Finn was thinking when he even suggested no back up.

Pushing the thought away, he reached into his pocket and pulled out several berries, instantly holding them out in front of Clarke. 

"Don't worry. They probably won't make you hallucinate." He smirked, before popping a few into his mouth. 

[the-clarkegriffin]

More Than This | Para 001

[the-clarkegriffin]

Clarke shut her eyes gently. Spacewalker. She wasn’t sure what she heard in Bellamy’s voice, but it sounded like venom. Though, there was a good chance she just made that up. “I’m not going to get into to this with you,” she said, her voice cracking a little. 

It was true, she didn’t want to speak to Bellamy about Finn, but she didn’t want him to leave either. The two gravitated towards each other, for better or worse. They were partners, leading a group of adolescents despite her fear of the unknown. She didn’t always agree with Bellamy’s tactics, and he didn’t agree with hers, but together, somehow, they’ve got this far.

She sniffled, and tried to get her hair out of her face, despite it sticking to her drying tears. Despite the fact that she’d seen him at his most vulnerable, she didn’t like showing that side of herself to him. They were similar, in a way; they hid from the rest of the world as best as they good. Maybe that was why they broke down in front of each other.

"Sit," she said, motioning to the spot beside her. Bellamy wouldn’t be out here looking for her if he didn’t have something important to talk to her about. They were planing for a battle. Time was precious, especially when the grounders could strike at any moment. "What do you need?" she asked, less sharp than the first time.

[the-bellamyblake]

Bellamy didn't think it was in his place to push her on it, so for once he kept quiet. Besides, why should he care? 

But he did. 

He swung his gun over his arm so that it rested against his back before sitting down beside her. He never thought his presence to be much comfort to anyone but Octavia, but right then and there he realized he wanted it to be. It would come as a surprise to everyone in camp, but Bellamy was experienced when it came to dealing with an upset girl. Besides their mother, he was all Octavia had for sixteen years. Who else could she have leaned on? 

His eyes darted toward Clarke and for a split second he was lost in thought. It actually took a moment to realize that she had just asked him a question. A question that he suddenly couldn't remember the answer to. 

And then it hit him. 

"We need to talk about what happened with the virus." His voice shook a little at the memory of being utterly afraid. 

"We've lost fourteen people. We were not prepared and we can't let it happen again but they have the upper hand." He could hear himself becoming more riled up.

"We've got guns, sure, but they've got experience on their side. They know everything there is to know about Earth and I just feel completely..." 

Helpless. 

He dropped his head into his hands for a moment before looking back at her. 

"We need to be smart about this, Clarke. We can't let them walk over us like they are. We can't lose anymore people."

He hesitated then, knowing she might not agree with what he had to say next, but that wouldn't keep him quiet. 

"I suggest we make the next move." 

[shorgasms-deactivated20141124]

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[the-bellamyblake]

Don't get too close, it's dark inside. It's where my demons hide, it's where my demons hide. 

[the-clarkegriffin]

More Than This | Para 001

"I’m not a consolation prize!" Clarke yelled, fighting back tears. Finn took a step forward and extended a hand in surrender.

"I know you’re not," he pleaded. 

Clarke shook her head and retreated. “If you really knew that, we wouldn’t be here. You would have broken up with Raven and not strung the two of us along.” She couldn’t look him directly in the eye. She knew if she did, she would see begging and remorse. Clarke felt for Finn, she really did. She could’ve loved him. Hell, she even started to. It didn’t mean she would be able to forgive him so easily. Even if she did need him to keep her sane. “Now, Raven breaks up with you and you come here thinking I’m just going to open my legs up for you again?”

Clarke’s gaze finally met his. It was a mistake. Her tears started flowing and she tried to wipe them away quickly. He wasn’t worth the heartbreak. “Clarke, please,” he said, touching her cheek with his palm. “That’s not what this is.”

She turned her head, Finn’s hand dropping to his side. She stared at the ground, refusing to look at him again. “Just leave me alone.”

"Okay," he said, his voice barely audible. Finn’s loud footsteps slowly got quieter as he made his way back to the camp. 

Finally, Clarke was alone. She would forgive Finn eventually, but she couldn’t let herself be with him. Even if it was what her heart wanted, her head was telling her otherwise. She couldn’t trust him. Then again, she hasn’t been able to bring herself to trust anyone since her father was executed.

She found a dry rock to sit on and she hung her head, letting out a few loud sobs before she composed herself.

In her dreams, Earth wasn’t like this. When she thought of the ground, when she drew it, she imagined it to be this place where she would be happy and free. Reality was crushing. She and the rest of the hundred were being hunted, preparing for a battle they could never be ready for. Fourteen graves, biological warfare, and the elements all proved to be too much for Clarke. Though, she’s kept herself together. She had to. People were depending on her. She couldn’t break.

Yet, here she was, crying over a boy. She didn’t hear the footsteps approach until it was too late. He was too close and he saw her. Face wet, she looked up at Bellamy Blake. “What do you want?”

[the-bellamyblake]

This wasn't the first time Bellamy had seen Clarke Griffin cry. Things had a way of going down hill fast. So fast, that this would probably not be the last time either.

She had seen him cry once as well. His moment of weakness after losing a battle against an insufferable amount of guilt. There was no more dodging it. Like Clarke said before, he knew what his actions had done and now he has to live with it. 

"It can wait." He shrugged, a little awkwardly. It was no secret that him and Clarke had been getting along much more than they did when they first arrived. He was slowly coming to terms with the fact that leading their people wasn't a job he wanted to do without her anymore. Whether that made them friends or not - he wasn't quite sure. 

"Let me guess... Spacewalker?" He was a little surprised that he bothered to ask. He already knew. But she was sitting there, pieces of her hair sticking in a few different directions, all the while looking up at him with those sad eyes of hers and well...

Let's just say he preferred it when she smiled. 

[stefnsalvtore]

who we are and who we need to be to survive are two very different things