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@the-brighter-side-blog1
favorite person: *does something slightly upsetting*
me: *splitting* yoU MONSTER YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOUR EXISTENCE DON’T EVER COME NEAR ME AGAIN YOU PIECE OF SHIT YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT ME YOU LIAR YOU’RE THE WORSE PERSON THAT HAVE EVER LIVED
me, a few minutes later: i love you with all my heart, you’re perfect
Literally never tell me to calm down because that’s just gonna make me split even harder and I will enter into Extreme Destruction Mode™
me: sends a message
fp: doesn't reply
me: thats ok!!
fp: is online and talks to other people and doesn't reply to me
me, grossly sobbing on the floor: that s !! ok,,ay !,
Me: *is obsessed with someone who gave me the slightest amount of attention* what a beautiful day to be in love
Me, three days later: lol who?
Does anyone else do The Thing where someone says they love you and you just kinda scoff in your head and go “No you don’t” like not angrily, you just legitimately accept that everyone is lying and that’s ok
up next on bpd radio; intrusive thoughts, “i hate myself and wanna die” followed shortly by mental static and splitting.
I hate the fact that in order to be “stable” (somewhat ) I have to take medication for the rest of my God awful life all because of what other people did to me is this really the consequence why am I serving their time
when you have bpd and someone says something that could be taken a few different ways
me: *does something stupid and impulsive*
me: *immediately after* yikers lol I am going to regret that later
me: wow this person seriously hurt me
them: *doesn’t apologize*
them: *acts like it didn’t happen*
me: ❤💓💕💖💗💟 I’m so sorry I was so mean I would die for you
BPD is this horribly awkward combination of constantly needing validation but feeling really uncomfortable when receiving it
i can go from being extremely anxious and worked up to suddenly becoming increasingly bitter and apathetic towards everyone in a matter of seconds depending on the tiniest action that i over-analysed to be a personal attack.
u ever just be chilling in a good mood when suddenly one (1) minor inconvenience occurs and u feel ur whole demeanor go kerplunk
Extreme anger? Check.
Extreme anxiety? Check.
Valid reason?
My brain is fucked. My brain is fucked and I’m tired of it.
BPD
me: I wonder... what would happen if I just...
me: *acts impulsively, shuts down, destroys relationships, triggers self repeatedly*
me: oh yeah now I remember
tbpdfw you split on someone and you don’t know if it’s your illness talking or if you actually don’t want them in your life anymore
