mandyp12

The Feels Assassin Christian Fangirl Engineer

[the-feels-assassin]

No Writing Update

The local SF/F convention I help run here in Albuquerque (Bubonicon, yes like the Bubonic plague) is two weeks from today, and between that and work there just hasn't been any time to write, alas. Hopeful I can still manage to squeeze in some words, but we shall see.

I mean, I am literally trying to write right now in the fifteen minutes I have before bed, but it won't be anything substantial enough for an update!

[nicijones]

Ao3 version that lets you open the 'director's cut' where I, the author, explain every detail in excruciating detail to you and what it is in reference to.

[liesmyth]

#it’s called sending me an ask and I tell you way more info than you actually wanted @newbromantics

[the-feels-assassin]

Writing Update

I literally wrote nothing this week. On the plus side, some of my lack of time was because I went and saw Spider-Man: Brand New Day! On the downside, some of that lack of time is because of work.

C'est la vie. Hoping to get some writing done this evening if I can.

[snahahahahpper]

Just realized I've been into Hawkeye since junior high, but I've never really drawn them. Now that I finally got some time, it feels like a dream come true.

[the-feels-assassin]

Writing Update

For reasons that can't be explained, I started writing a different fanfic than the Christmas fanfic I'm supposed to be working on. Because sometimes, this is how my brain works. So I have a writing update, but on the wrong fic!

The concept of this fic is simple: When Phil Coulson was a teenager, he fell deeply and truly in love at the circus. Ten years later, Agent Coulson hunts the mercenary known as the Amazing Hawkeye.

Fic: (working title) Steadfast Word Count: 3,289

Excerpt:

Phil Coulson is sixteen–a month short from turning seventeen–when he first lays eyes on Clint Barton.  It’s summer in Manitowoc. School just let out, and there is nothing to do. The circus is for babies, Phil thinks, but it’s also something different. It’s better than wandering the streets alone and getting harassed by bullies for being the angry kid with a dead dad or harassed by cops for being a loitering troublemaker. It’s better than sitting in the oppressive grief of his home, hoping his mother moves from her spot in front of the TV.  He swears she hasn’t moved in the two years since his father died. So yeah, maybe the circus might be dumb, but Phil is willing to take that risk for something different.

[the-feels-assassin]

Weekly Writing Update

Did I write anything in the Christmas fic I'm supposed to be working on? No. Did I somehow channel all of my work angst into a now completed 7,300 word fic about the annual SHIELD budget defense? Yes, yes I did.

Currently in beta, should post some time this week.

Fic: The Impact of the Quinjet on SHIELD Operations Words: 7,300

Excerpt:

SHIELD prided itself on its mission focus: mission first, people second, and everything else a far distant third. It was why Agent Phil Coulson filled out so many forms for his assets. Their focus should be survival and getting the job done, not perfecting bureaucracy.   Despite what Barton might think, SHIELD did not actually have that many forms. Coulson had been in the Army, an organization that took bureaucracy to dizzying heights. They used to joke in his unit that there was no better adversary of the US Army than its own red tape. Meanwhile, SHIELD leadership prided itself on having the least amount of bureaucracy to any other federal agency. That said, SHIELD was still a federal agency. So once a year, the focus of its upper management shifted away from the mission and to budget defense.  Coulson sat at his computer, cursing Fury, God, the World Security Council, and the Senate Appropriations Committee as he attempted to shrink the past year’s Operations Schedule into a human readable format on a PowerPoint chart. Two years ago when he’d shown a high-level schedule that he made in excel–the very format he actually used to track missions and ops–he’d been instructed in no uncertain terms that anything less than a two-level deep Gantt chart was unacceptable. The following year, he’d presented the two-level deep Gantt chart and then been told that it was an unreadable “eye chart” and to not get so into the weeds. So here Coulson was, trying to create some sort of unholy cross between the system he actually used, the system they claimed they wanted, and what would actually look good on a powerpoint chart. A twinge of a headache started in his temple as PowerPoint snapped an arrow to the wrong box for the third time in the row. He wished PowerPoint would stop helping so much, and just let him do what he needed to do. He clicked the end of the arrow again, re-aligning it and somehow that messed up the textbox it was attached to. Coulson hit ctrl Z and wanted to kill himself.

That's the opening! More to come! I'll let you guys know when it posts!

[the-feels-assassin]

In case you missed it, this fic did post: https://archiveofourown.org/works/88791906

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[the-feels-assassin]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Clint Barton/Phil Coulson Characters: Phil Coulson, Clint Barton Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Marriage Proposal, PowerPoint, Budget Defense, minor off screen character death, I promise somehow all these tags make sense together Summary:

Once a year, SHIELD shifts its focus from the mission and to budget defense.

In which Phil Coulson makes PowerPoint slides, deals with an operation gone to hell, and gets an unexpected surprise from Clint Barton.

[kat-har]

You missing Strike Team Delta or SHIELD era fics? Need some bureaucratic hurt-comfort? Love a good proposal? Just miss Phlint?

Read! Read now!

[the-feels-assassin]

I almost did tag it with the tag “hurt/comfort assuming you believe PowerPoint can hurt you.”

PowerPoint hurts me on a daily basis.

[the-feels-assassin]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Clint Barton/Phil Coulson Characters: Phil Coulson, Clint Barton Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Marriage Proposal, PowerPoint, Budget Defense, minor off screen character death, I promise somehow all these tags make sense together Summary:

Once a year, SHIELD shifts its focus from the mission and to budget defense.

In which Phil Coulson makes PowerPoint slides, deals with an operation gone to hell, and gets an unexpected surprise from Clint Barton.

[kat-har]

You missing Strike Team Delta or SHIELD era fics? Need some bureaucratic hurt-comfort? Love a good proposal? Just miss Phlint?

Read! Read now!

[the-feels-assassin]

I almost did tag it with the tag "hurt/comfort assuming you believe PowerPoint can hurt you."

PowerPoint hurts me on a daily basis.

[the-feels-assassin]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Clint Barton/Phil Coulson Characters: Phil Coulson, Clint Barton Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Marriage Proposal, PowerPoint, Budget Defense, minor off screen character death, I promise somehow all these tags make sense together Summary:

Once a year, SHIELD shifts its focus from the mission and to budget defense.

In which Phil Coulson makes PowerPoint slides, deals with an operation gone to hell, and gets an unexpected surprise from Clint Barton.

[the-feels-assassin]

Weekly Writing Update

Did I write anything in the Christmas fic I'm supposed to be working on? No. Did I somehow channel all of my work angst into a now completed 7,300 word fic about the annual SHIELD budget defense? Yes, yes I did.

Currently in beta, should post some time this week.

Fic: The Impact of the Quinjet on SHIELD Operations Words: 7,300

Excerpt:

SHIELD prided itself on its mission focus: mission first, people second, and everything else a far distant third. It was why Agent Phil Coulson filled out so many forms for his assets. Their focus should be survival and getting the job done, not perfecting bureaucracy.   Despite what Barton might think, SHIELD did not actually have that many forms. Coulson had been in the Army, an organization that took bureaucracy to dizzying heights. They used to joke in his unit that there was no better adversary of the US Army than its own red tape. Meanwhile, SHIELD leadership prided itself on having the least amount of bureaucracy to any other federal agency. That said, SHIELD was still a federal agency. So once a year, the focus of its upper management shifted away from the mission and to budget defense.  Coulson sat at his computer, cursing Fury, God, the World Security Council, and the Senate Appropriations Committee as he attempted to shrink the past year’s Operations Schedule into a human readable format on a PowerPoint chart. Two years ago when he’d shown a high-level schedule that he made in excel–the very format he actually used to track missions and ops–he’d been instructed in no uncertain terms that anything less than a two-level deep Gantt chart was unacceptable. The following year, he’d presented the two-level deep Gantt chart and then been told that it was an unreadable “eye chart” and to not get so into the weeds. So here Coulson was, trying to create some sort of unholy cross between the system he actually used, the system they claimed they wanted, and what would actually look good on a powerpoint chart. A twinge of a headache started in his temple as PowerPoint snapped an arrow to the wrong box for the third time in the row. He wished PowerPoint would stop helping so much, and just let him do what he needed to do. He clicked the end of the arrow again, re-aligning it and somehow that messed up the textbox it was attached to. Coulson hit ctrl Z and wanted to kill himself.

That's the opening! More to come! I'll let you guys know when it posts!

[the-feels-assassin]

Decided to enliven my work purse with a Hawkeye charm. Fortunately everyone at my work already knows I’m a nerd 😂

[sg1]

Stargate SG-1, 10.14 The Shroud

[the-feels-assassin]

Writing Update

Fic: Phlint Christmas Fic Words Written: ~1,500 Total Words: 128,691 Sorry there was no update last week! My nephew was in town, so I spent the week being a tourist in my own city.

This week I still didn't do as much writing as I would like due to being sick. Which is a shame, because with the holiday, I had time, and instead I mostly spent it being pathetic with a box of tissues. But I did write some!

If you do the math between the last update and this one you'll notice the total word count doesn't increase by 1.5k words. But that's because I trashed and re-wrote a whole scene. I don't know the exact amount I wrote, but it's at least 1.5k, but the overall gain with the trashing was only like 700 words.

(Also I never actually trash words, they just go in a different file in the scrivener, in case I ever need to pull them up again).

Anyway, the fic progresses! No excerpt today, because I didn't write anything easily snippable, alas.

[the-feels-assassin]

Writing Update:

Fic: Phlint Christmas Fic Words Written: 5,970 Total Words: 127,966

Taking three hours to write in a coffee shop by myself on Juneteenth definitely resulted in words! Next time I'll get a chance to have that much writing will be July 3rd, and I'm looking forward to it!

No sample of words today, because I usually try to share a lighthearted bit that can easily be taken out of context, and well, nothing I wrote this week was lighthearted. You'll just have to wait until this fic comes out, one day. (Hopefully this Christmas)

[the-feels-assassin]

Since it’s a federal holiday, taking some time to get some writing done!

[the-feels-assassin]

Fic Writing Update

It's Sunday so an update on this week's writing!

Due to a truly insane work trip where I did not make it to my destination but rather spent the night at the layover location due to airline shenanigans, I did not get much writing done. But! I did do some!

I don't know exactly how many words I wrote this week, because for some reason I didn't record the words last week. But I know I wrote at least 2,500 words yesterday.

WIP: Phlint Christmas fic Current Word Count: 121,996

This just an excerpt from Phil and Clint talking about how Phil was bullied in high school:

“I wish I had been there, when they were bullying you,” Clint said. “I wish we had been kids at the same time, and I wish I could have been there to put them in their place. To protect you. To be your friend.” Phil’s expression turned soft, and the man came and sat down on the bench next to Clint. He knocked shoulders, which Clint knew was the most he could ask, here in public, at the gym. “You know, I often think the same thing about you. I wish I had been there, at the circus at the end. To protect you. To catch you.” Clint’s heart clenched, and he had to look away, because yeah. He did too. “I, uh,” his voice sounded heavy, so he cleared it. “I used to daydream about that. Quite a lot actually.” “Really?” Surprise laced Phil’s tone, and how did this man still not know? How did he not understand? He was Clint’s fucking knight-in-shining armor. “Yeah,” Clint said, looking down at his hands, because he couldn’t look at Phil. “There are a hundred versions, I guess, but the best one is I’m sixteen. Barney just left, and Trick is being Trick. And you stride in, smoking hot in a suit, and you put him in his place and you do the whole Terminator 2 ‘Come with me if you want to live.’” Clint put on the full Austrian accent for that last bit. And then he let out a self depreciating laugh. “I wish you had found me sooner.”

[the-feels-assassin]

A year post baby number 2 and I finally have the time and desire to start writing a little bit again. Just re-read my unfinished Phlint Christmas fic and would love to have it finished by this Christmas.

[the-feels-assassin]

Okay, so since I'm back, I have actually been writing. I've written like 3k words this week, which is insane considering I haven't written in like a year. So trying my best to channel the mojo and keep it going.

This fic is currently standing at 120k words. Even generously assuming that 20k of them get trashed in the inevitable rewrite when I finish, it's pretty long. And this fic is a little over halfway done. So it'll probably be 200k words long when I'm done. (Insert my husband saying, "Did you say it was going to be short when you started it?")

Anyway, since it's been so long, context of this fic is it's a Christmas fic in which Strike Team Delta ends up in Phil's hometown of Manitowoc for Christmas, and Clint and Nat meet Phil's entire family. The set up/inspiration for this fic was sort of three-fold:

What if Phil Coulson was the screw up his family and his siblings were way more successful than him?

Going home for Christmas when you're the only one unmarried and/or without kids sucks. A lot. (Cue stories of me sleeping on the couch in my late twenties while everyone else had a bedroom!)

Isn't crazy that when you're home with your siblings and parents you sort of revert to a non-grown-up version of yourself? Some amalgamation of the adult you, the kid you, and the teenage you? And what does that look like for Phil Coulson? And what does Strike Team Delta think of that?

And thus this fic, which has no real name at the moment, was born.

Since I am determined to finish this for this Christmas (really I am!) I have a Sunday Six for us. And I'll probably try to post status updates every week. Despite having two maniac children now, my husband is also onboard plan "get Mandy writing again" and has pretty much point-blank instructed me to use a few hours every week to leave for work a little early and go sit at a coffee shop instead of heading straight to work. So I think it's gonna happen. I think I'm going to get there.

So enjoy this little snippet of a scene, which it took me a shockingly long time to write, that happens right after Phil has a run-in with one of his childhood bullies at a shooting range in Manitowoc.

“Seriously,” Phil said. “Please, go in there and shoot. I brought you here so you can get some range time in.” “Phil, I’m not going to use the range of some guy who fucking tortured you,” Clint said, exasperation bleeding into his tone. “You want me to kill him? Sure. I’ve killed men for less. But use his range? He doesn’t deserve to see my skills.” Another laugh escaped Phil, and he found himself smiling up at Clint. It was unfair. Phil was meant to be the one cheering Clint up, helping him forget about his past. Clint shouldn’t have to be doing the same for him. “Thanks, Clint.” “Seriously,” Clint said, his expression overly solemn. “You want me to kill him.” “Unnecessary,” Natasha suddenly appeared by their side. “I took care of him.” Phil frowned. From the Black Widow “taking care of someone” could mean anything from a polite threat between friends or hiding the body in a deep freezer. But Phil didn’t actually think Natasha would go that far. Though it filled him with warmth to think of the Black Widow roughing Roger Larson up. Natasha met Phil’s gaze with wide-eyed innocence. “What?” “We’re going to need a clean up crew, aren’t we?” Clint asked, with an over the top sigh. “Fury is never going to let us live it down if we can’t handle Manitowoc without needing to call in back-up.” “I didn’t kill him,” Natasha said disdainfully. “I’m not a monster.” “The SHIELD reports from the seventies beg to differ,” Clint retorted. “At least I was effective,” Natasha sniffed, “and mind you, never caught by SHIELD, unlike some spangled assassins we could speak of.” “Hey now, don’t throw around ‘spangled’ like it’s an insult. If spangles are good enough for Captain America then—“ “Children,” Phil said, unable to contain his smile.