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Show & Tell
todays bird
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
$LAYYYTER
Sweet Seals For You, Always

titsay
YOU ARE THE REASON
Noah Kahan
trying on a metaphor
Not today Justin
h

Discoholic 🪩

★
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

if i look back, i am lost
One Nice Bug Per Day

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@the-hittite
Hello. If you're a new user and just followed me, please reblog this so I don't mistake you for a bot and report you. Then go personalize your blog at least a little bit so no one else does either.
What's the best game you never want to play again? Personally I think I have to go with Crosscode. It was absolutely phenomenal, one of the best RPGs I've played, but some of the puzzles were just really annoying to execute and grinding for gear/quests/whatever was a slog given just how long the game already was.
Haven't been able to have another session in like a month due to scheduling and injuries, but I still think about how last session we had all this great tension built up with this close encounter with the big bad eldritch horror that we barely escaped then it all went away when we all spontaneously decided that all conversation for the next few minutes would include the realistic aftermath of gunfire in a confined space without hearing protection.
"A hiding place of the unwanted and discarded, mired in despair, rotted with the stagnation of water and with the One to accept these stray souls" is still my favourite Soulsborne trope. At least in the Top 5 of them.
Demon's Souls was the last game in the series that I've touched and finding out that The Trope TM was present even back then was such a pleasant surprise! It is always so haunting, moving and effective.
Valley of Defilement really stands aside from the other places we'd visit through the Archstones, not a place of the now derelict ancient culture neither a culture that thrived only recently before the Scourge, but instead a culture formed from the the people no one wanted.
People living here are willing to hunt everyone else to feed Astraea in "gratitude", they were too damaged and hurt to figure out another way to show their love and devotion.
It is sad that in this way she was the first outsider human from the "better" world outside of the prison of their excilement AND the last one at the same time.
Risaia was one of the holy people that ventured into the Valley of Defilement, and despite being lost to the place and dying here left their weapon possible to find only if at least two Demons are slain... and it is only three Demons here, one of which is Astraea and another CREATED to protect her in particular. Astraea and Garl do adress the fact that there would be people cruel enough to come hunt for the Demons' Souls here even though the only Demons here literally just exist without going outside to harm the rest of the world, if not help. I think we'd certainly be not the first, and Risaia would be an example of this person predating us.
Vito, another holy knight of the same order as Selen ( x ) simply got killed. However, Vito is also a known saint, not only by name but hinted at as one of the three Rings of Devout Prayer in the game is received by trading her Moonlight sword with Sparkly. I think Vito is meant to contrast Risaia not only as "sorcery weapon" vs "miracles weapon" duality, but in attitude too! The Moonlight Greatsword is a reoccuring trope in Soulsborne games that is always associated with the path of the occult and secrecy, in the shadow of the setting's titular typically golden holy/sun light. Remarkable Moonlight Greatsword holders in Fromsoft's games are Ludwig (became a unique beast, one of the only two still capable of talking and intelligent thought) and Ranni (turned on her family and rejected not only her own privileges but also the order of the world itself to give people equality and gentler guidance). Which might mean nothing...... or, it might mean that in their distrust running too deep, denizens of Valley of Defilement killed their possible ally or a potential fellow intelligent Demon. I guess it depends on how early Fromsoft started placing certain meanings into their reoccuring tropes! ...which might be THIS ealy, because Demon's Souls featrues embryo stages of almost everything else they continued using for the next two decades.
The relationship between Astraea and the downtrodden she tried to help had nothing but good intention at its core but ended up ruining both sides. There are very good reasons to stay wary, but at the same time there is no more discrimination on who dwellers of the Valley of Defilement are willing to murder for her. I don't think Astraea weeps even for the ones killing unfairly because, well, she needs to eat, neither you want to take any chances. Sometimes the damage is just too far gone to change, and they will swallow whatever ray of light shines on them, or this ray of light will only twist their senses as if it was better if it never appeared at all.
Blighttown is extremely similar to the Valley of Defilement, but it has a gentler turn to it for the comparison.
Some disease effected those that currently live in the Blighttown, and maybe the virus travelled and evolved from the Great Swamp which also feared twisting Pyromancy into Poison spells like what Eingyi did? Whatever happened but the infected were not wanted and simply quaranteened away without attempts to help them or at least soothe their pain. Which is... wild, considering how much Miracles of the Way of the White typically have to do with healing and soothing, even amongst simple human clerics!
There were singular compassionate people. Such as Yulva who left her duties to guard the sunken Little Londo to help those in the Blighttown... or, Fair Lady aka Queelag's Sister!
Queelag herself warning her to not help the diseased is also wild, what a demoness touched by the Chaos Flame had to fear? But Fair Lady still took the Blightpus onto herself, possibly explaining her sickly appearance. In gratitude, people that she helped allowed using their bodies to carry the parasiting eggs of her spawn...
However, unlike with Astraea, it is typically not them who hunt to feed her more "souls". They do get aggressive, but it is mostly the parasites they host seeking more room and they abide. She needs Humanities to birth more babies from, but it is Kirk that is doing the heavy lifting on this one. Although he used to be a Darkwraith, her kindness moved his heart and he chose to redirect his homicidal "talents" to give her the world instead. Heck, Eingyi chooses to give benefit of the doubt and trust you to be another servant! There is some kind of "optimism", albeit twisted! "A thing you've seen in Demon's Souls but not so depressing" is actually something you see in Dark Souls 1 a LOT!
But the Gutter, on the other hand, is THE biggest nightmare fuel of these places, personally. Whereas other places feel sad, tragic and pitiful? I don't know about you guys but I've regretted travelling through this level in the deep of the night as I was so horrified that I couldn't sleep afterwards... Although, I would say that Dark Souls 2 in general has the most "evil" atmosphere out of all Soulsborne games, and Dark Souls 3 only comes second. Dark Souls 3 still has grace within its grimdark vibe, it is decadent, not evil!
Everything in this place is terrible, and it starts instantly, with the giant scary hole interferring with Majula's otherwise solemn and comforting feeling. The Gutter is not presented with subtlety or sombriety in any way, it is a place where the unwanted people quite literally got dumped in like trash. It is not simply a place where the discarded people went to knowing it was their life now, but instead the one constantly taunting them with the hope of getting out of here being just out of reach. A false hope, too. The people in the Gutter didn't simply get their spirits ruined by an unhappy life, but by the attempts to come back crashed again and again.
And just when you think it couldn't have gotten any worse, when you meet Lucatiel who so far seemed like a nice, reliable and comforting presense, she has THIS to say:
I know the order of the locations visited is not quite linear, but I've met her here only after all the previous interactions and it was the most effective.
Also this time, for a change, the one person at the center of it all accepting the discarded and showing them compassion is not a nice pale lady pulled down from her grace by the ones she gave a helping hand to, and pulling others down from their grace in turn, but this Legion of the people who gave up and accepted their fate. What choice did they have left?
The Rotten accepts everyone and offers comfort without discrimination, like the Death itself... Except, "death" is not really a concept during the times of the Fire fading, so it is simply the concept of giving up but also of... finding a company? in its most twisted form. Everyone eventually loses the memory and sense of 'self' and becomes Hollow, just a husk seeking Souls without understanding why, and being accepted in the Rotten's mass is simply no longer having to do it yourself and leaving it to him.
Subterranean Shunning Grounds can be at first mistaken for the simple Sewers, but what I find especially effective about this place is that it is right beneath LEYENDELL. The beautiful, perfect, golden, glistening place everyone wished they could stay at, the concentration of everything the people in the Lands Between revere. Choosing to place Shunning Grounds underneath it is perfect metaphor for the system's ugly underbelly. I think out of all Soulsborne places like this, this one is placed the most effectively.
Another thing I especially like about Shunning Grounds is that the true gut punch settles in when you realise that it is not just "some" unwanted and persecuted people in the Lands Between who got thrown into this place but that the ones unwanted and persecuted were the characters you've already met and formed opinions on! Morgott at the very least for certain. It feels way more personal and effective.
Heck, I'd like Elden Ring's narrative more if there was no way to NOT meet Mohg before Shunning Grounds! Just letting it settle in that the scary blood cult Demigod you've just met and died 30 times to was once a child thrown into literal sewers. Having to connect misplaced pieces and then gazing at the final puzzle in ave is a great Soulsborne experience, sure, but some experiences just should be unskippable even for casual players.
...just like how I'd like its narrative way more if they've kept Kale's questline instead because hoooo boy... Watching the NPCs you've became familiar with have their spirits crashed before your eyes because you did try to "help" them would never fail, ever. Sorry Fromsoft, but there was NO reason to remove this questline, especially with how Bell Bearings mechanics allows the player to still buy things even with merchants gone. These events will always be canon for me, no matter what.
(Restored questline video here: ( x ))
And instead of a person at the center of the pain, despair and resentment offering the compassion, twisted or not, it is the manifestation of the despair itself. It is not about living life of the utterly downtrodden hinged on hostility to the outsiders, not about exchanging your burdens and not even about letting someone else carry all your burdens entirely... But, it is about no longer living at all.
Even the way to get to this place is so horrifyingly haunting that to the moment you get to the Three Fingers, you might yourself start to wonder whether the existence is worth it if it will always inevitably result into something like this.
I think Melina's point should have stayed entirely all about questioning the nihilism and pointing out how parting with the pain and suffering means parting with hope and love the existence brings too... The whole thing about "saving" her life at the expense of everything else slightly overloaded the gravity of this concept! We are thinking about BIG and PHILSOPHICAL things here and introspect within our own despair here! The trolley problem makes it more difficult and shifts the emotional focus! Have Melina die (or live) regardless of our choices entirely, and her heartfelt speech about existence and not despairing would fit PERFECTLY!
...I've ended it on a bit of a ranting note, sorry. I just think that whereas other three "places like this" were executed perfectly, Shunning Grounds has the most criticism and room for improvement. However, it ALSO has the most potential for the emotional impact and what it did do right it did REALLY right.
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And, again, I really love that these places always have the filthy waters. Miyazaki loving the poisonous swamps is not just a favourite joke, it is a very important marker of Fromsoft's common themes! Stagnation of water, or "kegare", is one of the most striking ways they're using to show how the soul of the society and individuals gets damaged.
Humanity is historically deluded with the idea of protecting its purity by simply throwing away the ones they do not want and denied the contact with the "good" people they deeply rot within, just like a lake denied any rivers turns into a swamp.
The Gutter gets an extra layer with the Rotten's NG+ Great Soul tying him not to Nito but to the Undead Crypt. A place built to house the undead in eternal, peaceful rest, connected to the Shrine of Amana which is designed to bring them comfort and healing. There's the hints of a story about a previous Savior of the Lost who suffered a tragic end that we'll never know the details of.
You are an adventurer in a generic fantasy world and you use this weapon!
Do you like it?
YES!!!!!
yes
Eh it's okay
No
NO!!!!!!!
Was thinking about the Vault 15 civil war and how we know basically nothing about what actually happened. At first I thought it was kind of sad that there's no actual text or evidence of what happened, but then I realized that it ties into the central themes. Just like how until very recently the series didn't give any hint as to who launched the first nukes. It's just another war like any other and war never changes. It doesn't matter who had the moral high ground or the bravest soldiers. War doesn't determine right and wrong, only what's left. And Fallout (the first one at least) isn't really interested in telling a story about war itself, only the aftermath. The Fallout. Vault 15 is just as much ancient history as the US. What matters to the story and the characters is that some of the survivors were Haves and the rest were Have-Nots.
Was working on a rant about Bethesda's writing again then I remembered what's happening right now and I just... I'm not feeling it anymore. Fuck Microsoft.
The only meaningful difference between the peaceful residents of Shady Sands and the Khans who raid their village and kidnap teenagers (or the cannibalistic Jackals, or snake worshipping Vipers, or the implied other factions that died out offscreen) is that a couple generations back, one of those groups managed to both get and hold onto the Vault's GECK and the others didn't. And I can guarantee they didn't do that by asking nicely. It's not a difference of morality or ideology, one faction was just more successful at being ruthless bastards and it gave their descendants the privilege of a comfortable agrarian society.
Gonna be honest, I don't have any faith in the AAA market to produce anything worthwhile anymore. Call me when you're ready to pay your employees more to work less.
Replaying KOTOR 2 again and man this era of moral choice RPGs really didn't age well. There's been plenty of discussion over the years about how even in a setting as black and white as Star Wars, only having the choice between selfless saint and complete bastard really makes it hard to roleplay as an actual person. But I think a more fundamental reason they fail is that they don't really affect gameplay. The games will make a big deal about how choosing the good option is some sort of sacrifice, but the realities of game balance mean that the actual rewards and challenges end up being pretty much the same.
And it's especially jarring in this case because that balance makes no sense with the story they're trying to tell. The diegetic reason why killing enemies and finishing quests rewards you with XP is because (spoilers) you're a walking eldritch horror that feeds on death and chaos. But being niceys and finishing quests in a way that restores order and heals the Force gets you just as much XP as being a huge, self-centered asshole. Kreia keeps calling you out for "weakening yourself" by helping others, while all the time you're stronger than ever. I don't think the game would be better as a game if the light side path was some insane challenge run where you never level up, but it would definitely be a better story.
Some wildflowers I spotted on a walk yesterday. Fire Pink, Heart-leaf Skullcap, American Germander, Deptford Pink, and Yarrow.
Just throwing this out there, but a British man who was a journalist and professional writer throughout the entirety of Thatcher's term might actually have some valid observations about the differences, or lack thereof, between a terrorist and a freedom fighter.
It's been years since I played New Vegas Bounties and it still pisses me off how you go to have this final confrontation with Marko and he stands there and demands you let him "say his piece" as if he hadn't spent every single second of acreen time up to that point constantly yapping about his bullshit straw nihilist philosophy.
One problem I consistently have with any sort of game that has character building or progression is that as soon as I hit my peak I pretty much instantly lose interest in that character no matter how much of the actual game is left. It's worst with RPGs but I can run into it with a lot of other types of games too. For instance in my current run of The Long Dark I just cleared the plane crash. I've got top tier clothing in every slot, at least one of every tool, and food for literal weeks. I could do anything I want but because there's nothing left to really work towards I don't have any interest in doing it. First time through I still had exploration to drive me, but I've already seen everything once and it doesn't interest me. Until and unless I buy the expansion or I guess some of the challenges I haven't tried I think I might be done.
Trip to and through Ash Canyon was pretty unremarkable. Rope to Homesteader's was there already so I took the high road around to the mine. Kinda amazing how generous the region is with matches and flares but I'm not really complaining. Got back to Mountaineer's Hut and the moose hide is still only 66%. Decided to work on clearing out the scattered containers while I wait on the rest. I swear the crates on the ridge overlooking Crystal Lake are cursed because every time I go after them something goes wrong. This time a blizzard rolled in while I was sawing and on the way back I walked right into 5 timberwolves. Somehow made it back to base without getting lost, but that was really annoying.
Not sure what order I want to do things at this point. My next main goals are to get to the Ash Canyon mine and the summit of Timberwolf Mountain to get the loot there. But I'm not sure if I should head out immediately and let the moosehide cure while I'm gone, or wait for the satchel (plus deer pants and rabbit hat I'm also waiting on) and head out fully prepared. On the one hand, I want to get to the summit soon to keep the loot from degrading. On the other, I want to go full loot goblin mode when I get there. Or do I compromise and drag the hide with me to Mountaineer's, leave it there and hope it's done by the time I'm back from Ash Canyon? Decisions, decisions...