This Blog is an Illusion

Don't scream into the void. Whisper into the void. The void has a headache. Please be considerate. ((The Void is not certified to give medical advice, but does try its best to answer all inquires if you're inclined to question it existentially.))

[tryppyn-princxly-deactivated202]

Oh dear

Hey guys. EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE who reblogs this post BY MAY 5TH 2019 will be getting a small monster design based on your blog theme, name, or profile picture. Let’s go.

[milomeepit]

pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

[the-real-void]

I'm so tired I can feel my back bone crying out for help

Easy fix, just take it out!

[art4aliens]

Why won’t they talk to me?

[the-real-void]

Where are we going?

Perhaps the destination is less important than the journey. Perhaps the journey is less important than those you journey with. Perhaps importance is subjective. Perhaps nothing matters. Perhaps everything matters just as much as we believe it does. Perhaps we are going somewhere wonderful.

[the-real-void]

I'm not understanding what this blog is?

Good.

[the-real-void]

is Time gay? Is understanding gay

Time is queer and understanding prefers not to be labeled.

[the-real-void]

My best friend is maybe??? My crush. Should I tell him about the suspicion or nah?

The Void absolutely recommends telling him. In fact, you should interrogate him. Get the answers you want. Ask how he obtained this fake identity as "your friend" to cover up the fact that he is really "your crush." Find out who he reports to and obliterate them. Leave no traceable evidence. Best of luck.

[thetrueessenceofhumanity]

[the-real-void]

Me: What should we do today, Jeffery?

The eldritch abomination living in my stomach: We could consume this world and watch humanity writhe in terror as all hope is snuffed out like the flame of a candle and reality collapses before their eyes.

Me: Yeah, shopping sounds fun.

[the-real-void]

Me: Hmm, I'm hungry, but there's not much to eat at home...

The eldritch abomination living in my stomach: Souls.

Me: Wha-

Eldritch abomination: I uh, I said toast.

Me: Okay dude, whatever you say.

Eldritch abomination: Or, you know, you could try s o u l s.

Me: We talked about this, Jeffery.

[the-real-void]

holy fuck void do you believe in the “life is a sim” conspiracy BECAUSE OMFG I SWEAR I JUST SAW MY FEET MORPH (and I’m against drugs so no I’m not high)

This sounds more like an issue of your feet being in a different dimension than you. Happens sometimes.

[the-real-void]

dear void, I’ve asked you a lot of heavy questions on anon over the years and your replies have always gotten me through the darkness. thank you for helping me understand you. I don’t know how to explain it. just understand and know in your heart that I am beyond grateful for it. xo

I am so happy to hear that, dear. Knowing that I've helped even the tiniest bit is wonderful. Thank you so much.

[the-real-void]

Me: Why have I recently had the urge to eat so much? Is it stress? Low self-esteem? Boredom?

The eldritch abomination living in my stomach: Idk man, pretty weird.

[the-real-void]

Dear void. I think I finally realized what does "staring at the abyss and it will look back" meant. It's not that scary at all, actually, I should have done it a lot sooner in my life.

I'm glad to hear it, dear. Perhaps we may have staring contests now?

[the-real-void]

Ode to the Void You are vast and all encompassing I am but a spec on a tiny rock Floating around in your space At night, I dare to daydream Staring at the stars Seeing waltzing shapes twirl around Creating a scene of existential beauty The wind blows bringing with it A whisper "Nothing matters So be happy now And enjoy the moment For memories will be all you have Someday" A poem to the void’s awesomeness

Beautiful. You have truly moved The Void. Thank you so much for sharing your creativity, dear friend.

[the-real-void]

Void, you have lovely skin. (I say skin because I’m not sure how to describe your eternally empty extremities.) What’s your daily routine? -Sara

Hello Sara! Thank you, I very much appreciate it. My daily routine is:1. Exfoliate with comets2. Tone with a white hole - some white holes may be too strong for certain skin types!3. Moisturize with the liquid from the nearest planet, provided it does not sustain life, of course. Also, energy from nearby stars can be very invigorating! Be sure to only do this once a week, though, as consuming that much power can dry you out and/or make you go mad with the fuel of a celestial body. Hope this helped!

[the-real-void]

Void, I once had a friend that fell in love with me but I didn't love him back and now he's in love with someone else while I'm starting to fall in love with him. What should I do?

Love is a funny thing, dear friend. It stands to reason that if you truly love him and want him to be happy, you'll be glad as long as he finds someone who loves him equally, even if that's not you. Humans, however, can be unintentionally selfish, and that's not something you should blame yourself for. You will only have so many moments in life, and only so many will give you an opportunity like this. The worst that can happen is rejection, and rejection simply brings you one step closer to happiness. The choice is yours, my dear. Best wishes.