the riddler

i am the riddler. i love riddles. ran by @phlegmilys-rambles

[the-riddler-offical]

i have existed for so long, but i am now new. what am i?

you may not guess it, so i will give you the answer - riddler-offical!

for i am the riddler, you see. i love riddles. i want to fight batman. you get the gist

i am not a woman, but i am not nonbinary. what pronouns do i use?

he/him. yes this riddle was awful. i am ashamed at myself for not coming up with a better one.

-

basic dni criteria. im just having a fun time

-

MOD INTRO:

hi uh im emily/onyx. you can find me at @phlegmilys-rambles ! i use any pronouns and i love the riddler a lot. i am bad at riddles, so im trying. "these riddles stupid as hell" unfortunately i know.

[the-riddler-offical]

mod forgot abt this acc whoops.

[the-riddler-offical]

your pronouns riddle is actually saying you use he/him & masc neos :3

howd you figure out my secret

[the-riddler-offical]

i cant even come up with riddles anymore. what has my life become? what am i, if not the riddler?

[spiderman-offical]

Oh.. damn it. I'm in the wrong universe.

@riddlers-assistant-andrew

Uhhhh awkward! Hope you find yourself in the right one buddy!

[riddlers-assistant-andrew]

You guys have a Riddler here?

[spiderman-offical]

I think that’s something you’re gonna have to ask @brucie-wayne-offical or @superman-offical cause that sounds like DC to me

Unless I’m very behind on Marvel knowledge…

[brucie-wayne-offical]

I believe there is a Riddler, yes. Of course, I haven't personally encountered him yet! Surprisingly, considering how many people like to kidnap me.

[the-riddler-offical]

IM GONNAGET YOU ONE DAY

[the-riddler-offical]

Riddle-y dee

Riddle-y dum

How many bottles would it take

To get high off of rum

(IDK LMAO THIS IDEA JUST CAME TO ME AND I THOUGHT ABT YOUR BLOG)

is something qwrong with you

[the-riddler-offical]

How many Lowe’s would rob lowe rob if rob Lowe could rob Lowe’s?

- @bubble-official

All of them? I don't know. hrm....

[the-daily-planet-offical]

are batman and the joker gay and in love

Um, as we are based in Metropolis, we would have no idea. This is more of a question for the Gotham gazette.

[joker-offical]

Yes we are, thanks for asking!

[the-batman-offical]

No.

[joker-offical]

Aw, c’mon Bats. You know you love me!

[the-batman-offical]

No, I don't. And it would take a lot of work for you to get to the point where I would even consider it. Work I doubt you're willing to do.

[joker-offical]

Ha, that’s a good one! You can pretend you don’t love me, Batsy, but I know you do. 🥰

[the-riddler-offical]

why is there a lovers quarrel on my feed

[the-riddler-offical]

i bet you say riddle me this you sick mf

(JOKING OF COURSE, bein silly)

riddle me thi-......

wait a minute

[the-riddler-offical]

opinions on the Bat?

- @twink-offical

he beats my ass, doesnt like my riddles and sends me off to arkham. strong dislike. im sure in day to day life he cannot be as much as an asshole as he is at night. right

[joker-offical]

WHAT?!?! What are you talking about?! The Bat is PERFECT!

[the-riddler-offical]

um, no he hates my riddles hes not perfect at all

[the-riddler-offical]

how about I riddle YOU this:

I speak without a mouth and hear without ears. I have no body, but I come alive with the wind. What am I?

An echo. Duh.

[thejoker-offical]

Crazy I was crazy once crazy I was crazy once crazy they locked me in a rubber room with rats and rats make me crazy i was crazy once rats room rubber

Accurate arkham asylum depiction its so yucky in there not to my tastes ☹️

[the-riddler-offical]

true

[tim-drake-offical]

at least I’m safe from the time loop here

[the-riddler-offical]

however you cannot escape my riddles

[tim-drake-offical]

@stephanie-brown-offical d-list criminal here smh

[the-riddler-offical]

check your mailbox.

[tim-drake-offical]

there’s nothing there…?

[the-riddler-offical]

what??? oh wait i never gave you the bomb.

....

wait wheres my bomb

[tim-drake-offical]

at least I’m safe from the time loop here

[the-riddler-offical]

however you cannot escape my riddles

[tim-drake-offical]

@stephanie-brown-offical d-list criminal here smh

[the-riddler-offical]

check your mailbox.

[tim-drake-offical]

at least I’m safe from the time loop here

[the-riddler-offical]

however you cannot escape my riddles

[the-riddler-offical]

if batman sends my ass to arkham one more time i swear to fucking god

[thebadchoicemachine]

[mythologynerdfelix]

guess what?

It’s BLORBO SUNDAY

Letss goooooooo

My fav time of the month

[can-tab-eater-offical]

Goddamn it, I’m Sexy MeowMeow

[snomeraphim]

IT’S CRAB SUNDAY GUYS

[ur-least-fav-gal-offical]

BLOCK GEORG???? WTFS THAT

[the-riddler-offical]

...... what is a connecticut meowmeow