Band Nerd

My clarinet’s name is Yvette, and I love her. I am The First Clarinet(TM) in a band where that doesn’t matter because there are three clarinets and one of them has no clue how to even play. Everything here is wrong. The trumpets are shy and bad at playing, the Trombones don’t play even their glissandos loudly, and my fellow clarinets are the biggest crackheads in the band (besides maybe the percussionists).

[seth-storm]

Help an English project out, trans peeps

Tell me:

Gender things

I’ve gotten HRT and am happy with the results

I’ve gotten HRT and am unhappy with the results

I want HRT but I’m currently mentally ok without it

I want HRT and I’m mentally struggling because I don’t have it

I don’t want HRT due to side/effects medical reasons

I don’t want HRT because I don’t think it would make me happy/affirm me

Vanilla Extract (other)

Voting ended onApr 17, 2023

I’d appreciate the help! :)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

If you guys don’t mind helping me out with an English project I’d appreciate it :)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Clarinet: no one girl needs that many clothes…

Drums (male): well excuse me I like to look prettay

Clarinet: well I look like a trash can no matter what I wear so I’ll stick to my five year old shirts thank you very much

(As a clarinet with way too many clothes, I’m with the percussionist on this one, sorry guys 😂)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Tuba: I can breathe through both nose holes today.

Percussion: I think in Kentucky they call that improvement.

…I’ve never been to Kentucky.

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Clarinet: It starts with an ‘E.’

Oboe: Schemes. The ‘E’ is silent.

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

French Horn: Live, laugh, love.

Clarinet: Live, laugh, level up.

Bari Sax: Live, laugh, ligma.

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Trumpet: And then we spent history class learning about… idk it was like Polio or something.

Flute: Aren’t you guys learning about Ancient Greece right now?

Clarinet, facepalming: Yes, and today we learned about *Apollo.*

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

quotes from my band :D

SUFFOCATE -my band teacher

u gobbled ur flute -percussion

pac man eating an apple bro -that one problem flute

i dont focus on tongues -same percussion

[dungeons-and-demagorgons]

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

First day of college concert band today, wish me luck on chair auditions!

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

I messed up the Bb scale in my audition, skipped a note

On the easiest scale known to clarinetkind

HOWEVER

I’M STILL A FIRST CLARINET BABYYYYYY

Placements came out yesterday and I must have played that etude like Mozart because ya boy is a first chair clarinet

(There were 9 clarinets, 3 were put on each part)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

First day of college concert band today, wish me luck on chair auditions!

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

i feel bad for your trombone section… they should play louder.

Don’t feel bad for them they are hooligans worthy of no dog treats

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

I just realized this account has a decent amount of followers, so everyone do not despair! School starts again for me soon and I’ll be in band this year lol so there will be new content soon :)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Ok, my Oboe’s name is Michelle, and she is an absolute jerk. She won’t play anything lower than a low E and makes absurd goose noises in the middle of any piece I’m playing. I recently met my old band director from a few years ago, and she asked me if I still sounded like a strangled duck. Michelle and I are offended.

Anyways, how are you?

I’m well!! Tell Michelle I say hello, and just remeber nobody likes the oboe, oboe players most of all :)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Trombone: CLARINET! I NEED YOUR HELP! I—

Clarinet: Is the living room on fire?

Trombone: …No?

Clarinet: Then it’s not an emergency. *hangs up*

Baritone: Well? What did they say? What do we do about the portal to hell in the living room?

Trombone: Apparently it’s not an emergency.

Tuba: *being strangled by a demon* WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN IT’S NOT AN EMERGENCY?!

[seth-storm]

https://youtu.be/QAJ4E6SU7Qs

Want a villain songs from the POV of a dragon? Here you go! Hope you enjoy it 😂

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

My new song! Maybe you guys would like it :)

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Percussion: I’m going to have an ANEURYSM.

Clarinet: You need to calm down.

Percussion: I am calming down, that’s why I’m holding you. You make me CALM.

Clarinet: It’s not working.

Percussion: IT TAKES A SECOND.

[the-sixth-first-clarinet]

Clarinet s: we look like we’re in the military

Clarinet c: we are

Clarinet s: we are?!

Clarinet c: yeah look at the exercises we do in the morning

Clarinet s: oh my god we are

Clarinet c: or a cult

Clarinet s: def a cult

Clarinet c: yeah cult is more likely

I love people figuring out for the first time that we’re a cult

Like it’s not a big leap, but it’s an important one 😂😂😂