[alisonzai]

[inkskinned]

haha wow i’m really exhausted for someone who only ever does the bare minimum requirements of getting by

[ellenripleys]

peak laziness is being too lazy to even just sit and watch a 2 hour movie

[randomsplashes]

this is 100% true adsadjfalds i feel so attacked rn (x)

[actualbpd]

*doesnt remember 90% of the things i say or do*

[hungwy]

When y'all fake conversations in your heads do you sometimes say random sentences out loud too? I was just tying my shoes and said very sternly and loudly “I DO know how ants work, fucker”

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[bort-the-champion-of-bears-deac]

*flashback to me trying to play with the bear outside the house

[mrsunrepentantwarriorpriest]

All I could think of was this 

[unrepentantwarriorpriest]

Priceless.

[explanatorypower-deactivated201]

“individual utilized the racoon to blow into the interlock system successfully…” might be the greatest sentence ive ever read

[southernbellerva]

@pineland-express

[ameriqan]

can i apologize in advance for basically everything i will ever do

[sabertoothwalrus]

this kitten weighs over 5 pounds already and he’s only 14 weeks old. He’s half the size of an adult cat and he hasn’t even lost his baby teeth yet

[sabertoothwalrus]

He is now 16 weeks old and over 6 pounds. Kittens are supposed to be half their adult weight at 5-6 months, and he is barely 4 months old. What the fuck.

[sabertoothwalrus]

Now at 22 weeks, 5 months old, half his adult weight, this baby is 10 pounds,,,

[sabertoothwalrus]

30 WEEKS. 7 MONTHS.

14 POUNDS.

THAT IS TWICE THE AVERAGE WEIGHT OF A CAT HIS AGE. THE GIRLS IN HIS LITTER ARE ONLY LIKE 8 POUNDS WHY IS HE SO HUGE

[sabertoothwalrus]

Hello it is Time for Another Update!!!

It is June 18th, 2018. Half-n-Half is now 10 months old. Last I weighed him (like 2 weeks ago?) he was over 15 pounds, but he’s not gaining weight as rapidly anymore. Regardless, he’s still Big

[awellboiledicicle]

absolute unit

[steamandsequins-deactivated2020]

ice water is so fucking good

[steamandsequins-deactivated2020]

not only is it refreshing but once you’re finished you can either chew on the ice or let it melt and then you have more water… choose your own adventure

[hawk-butt]

I mean….sure

[princesstigerbelle]

Stick mm legy up real high

[mr-psycho-bunny]

[saturn-itself]

what the fuck century was this set in, anyway?

[jodiefoster]

anybody else here not good at anything

[okaytrue]

*comes across a slight inconvenience* me: you know what would solve this ????? death

[whitepeopletwitter]

Yeah can we talk about this

[o6eiyrskb4hg7rix8hih-deactivate]

good evening (in vampire voice)

[markv5]

The life of a cat is dangerous and difficult

The life of a cat is dangerous and difficult